The Being a Confirmed Single
Tinmantu
20 years ago
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walksalone
20 years agoTinmantu
20 years agoRelated Discussions
The worst things about being single
Comments (35)Hmmmm....I love being single and fully enjoy being "captain of the ship". Not that I wouldn't enjoy spending time with a compatible man, or having someone around to clean the gutters once in awhile, however my happiness is not contingent on this. The worst thing for me about being single is being misunderstood and subjected to other people's ignorant misconceptions about singlehood! For example, most people assume that because I am middle-aged, single, and never married "there must be something wrong with me". Perhaps I am too independent, but basically, I've never met Mr. Right and wasn't willing to compromise (and there have been many suitors). On more than one occasion, married women have assumed that because I'm single I am interested in poaching their husbands. Wow, the LAST man on earth I would be interested in is a married man, especially your pot-bellied, boring husband. What's more, do you know how many married or attached men have solicited me? Despite the fact that I do not give them the slightest encouragement nor do they get a toe in the door. Being single and alone, having the luxury to explore your own inner psyche, control your own destiny, and follow your own spiritual path unfettered - it is grossly under-rated....See MoreGood Things about being Single
Comments (38)tinmantu, you mean you don't have a bag of beef jerky or a sandwich next to that beer, computer and football game? Now and then make a phone call at the same time. Now THERE'S multi-tasking! ;) Somehow I was thinking about this very topic just the other day. There's certainly advantages to being single, as are there disadvantages. And when people would ask why I never married, I got sick of hearing it so I came up with the answer because 100% of all divorces started out with marriage! It shuts them up. And if I know they've been divorced, especially more than once I'll occasionally throw in that I can't afford a divorce and my religious beliefs require "till death do us part..." That really puts a cork in the religious ones! A few other lines when appropriate too! I definitely enjoy solitude. Time to think great thoughts, solve the world's problems and come up with some great jokes. Then again, there's nobody handy to tell the jokes to and the cats don't appreciate my sense of humor! There's times I'd enjoy a board game or game of cards with some intelligent conversation with someone other than myself or now the cats. But there's the reverse too. Yes, there's nobody to split the chores, but then there's the other advantages you've pointed out before. If I can't sleep and want to get up and wander around, have the TV on, etc, it's no problem. But I will say, it would be nice to have someone make a bowl of soup when I'm not feeling well... I know I have my quirks as does everyone, and laundry is one of them. When I lived with a gal, she washed her own clothes and I washed mine. I didn't want anyone doing mine and I didn't want to do anyone elses! BTW, one of the other advantages, toilet seat notwithstanding, is that the toilet paper is ALWAYS put on the right direction! I know people who feel they HAVE to be married. Some, or most of them I feel sorry for. Either must have someone take care of them or have someone to take care of. Can't be a mutual thing. Hope I never feel that way and feel fortunate I never have felt that way. Course it makes me the oddball in most social circles. Everyone's life could be better in other ways. But then again, they could all be worse too....See MoreAm I being irrational? (vacation ordeals with SO's DD)
Comments (16)thanks everyone, I go on trips with my DD21, we went to Paris this April break. And DD went wiht dad's family on a trip during her other break in the winter. In neither case DD forced herself on neither me nor her dad. But both I and X have more vacations that that. It would be normal if his DD would spend SOME of the vacations wiht him, but it is all of the vacation he has. KKNY DD27 and her mother had fights on travels, during those fights SO was forced to take sides (he took daughter's side), all those fights were bad on a relationship. It almost feels ot me that she was trying to stand between her dad and mom. Of course that's not what caused a divorce but I believe it contributed to it. woudl she stand between me and him? It is entirelly possible imamommy that she is trying to do just that, but it's been like this always. the only change is that SO finally stopped going just him and her and now she goes with us (or actually the way it looks like they go two of them and I am dragging along LOL). KKNY we went on many trips and vacations together but as we got more serious, DD27 wants to be wiht us all the time and since she is always here whenever dad has vacations, we simply cannot go anywhere anymore. i was looking forward to July vacation but now we can't even do that. On few occassions we planned on going somwhere ona trip, but DD changed her plans or alternated them, left earlier than plannned or flew in alter etc. My SO also cancelled his trip to college reunion past winter because DD27 decided to visit the last moment (when she found out he goes to reunion). Bizzare....See MoreA single bloom, a single rose
Comments (14)Suzy, by the way, I hope your shipping container DOES turn out to be robbery proof! Are you growing other Chinas in your woods? I admit I find it hard to reconcile those sun-loving plants with the mental image I have of your property. Well, to continue: the pleasures aren't necessarily what we thought they'd be. There's the expectancy: seeing that the seeds did sprout, that the plant did survive that hideous freeze, that the cutting stuck in the ground the fall before did start to leaf out. I love the new foliage of the once-blooming old roses, so fresh and tender. It starts to get disease right around the start of flowering time, so you have this window, once the roses have leafed out and are forming their buds, where there's just beautiful living green. I've thought about the difference between what my garden is to me and to my rare visitors. The guest sees what's there at the moment; they haven't lived the history. They're not thrilled at the little Daphne laureola, which was dug up in the hills nearby and successfully transplanted; they don't get excited that the Cyclamen cilicium is seeding around. They enjoy the handsome Daphne odora 'Aureomarginata', but don't share my triumph at having figured out that it was exactly the right plant for that spot. My sister the horticulturalist, a wonderful plant person, saw more than the guest would who just wants a sea of flowers, but even she was there only at one point in time. I'm in my garden through the year, living the succession of flowers and all the various beauties, but experiencing also the soil--lots of soil--the weeds and little herbs, the change of the weather and the seasons. And even though I'm not very observant, still I see quite a lot, sooner or later, simply by being there month after month and year after year. What is most beautiful in the garden is serendipitous. I can never wholly plan for it, though I do a great deal of serious planning. Some combination of plant and moment and light and my mood do it. There are moments of delight, sometimes with seemingly slight causes: I love oak leaves and acorns and buds, and have been tickled pink by clematis stems and foliage. Scent will do it too, of course. Titian, that's exactly it....See MoreDaisyduckworth
20 years agoTinmantu
20 years agowalksalone
20 years agolpinkmountain
20 years ago
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