Hi Melissa - ah...Los Gatos......probably the only other city in the area that is as contentious about building as Los Altos...in fact, LG might have overtaken LA...... (Your comment about neighbors suing neighbors reminds me of this short sidebar....this probably really belongs in the "House Disasters" forum...) The architect we hired was a referral from a neighbor, whose house we *love* - in fact, it's the only house in the neighborhood we admire (rancher neighborhood, 50+ years old, many/most have been remodeled, many very badly. A few have been rebuilt, and DON'T ASK ME WHY but people and the city are seeing fit to build mediterranean-style homes that look like they belong in Miami/South Beach...whatever.... Anyhow, this neighbor built a lovely Craftsman that's elegant and well thought out). Turns out, neighbor acted as GC (with no prior experience), loved it, and decided to do it again on a larger lot in the LG hills. Hired said architect with the intention of building and moving in to this home and selling the Los Altos home. Well, the LG neighbors put up SUCH a stink about everything - basement (?!? why do you care if I have a basement that doesn't impact your home or foundation?), sight lines (the home they tore down was a tiny, old house so the neighbors, who all live in LARGE houses, were spoiled by the sight lines the old house afforded), overall size (ironically, smaller than the neighbors who were complaining), etc. So much so, and planning commission meetings were apparently so contentious that my neighbors decided to nix the basement, build a spec house, and stay in Los Altos. So sad! (Though I quite like them as neighbors, so I personally am happy they're here. Just sad for them.) Radiant heat business?!? As in, for homes? We were just discussing radiant heating this past weekend.....quick question - do people put radiant heat under showers? We are planning (in our heads - we're a year away from building) a "wet room" - soaking tub and shower(s) in the same tiled space, and one of the negative I've read about is that it takes more effort to get the shower space warm - we thought a warm floor would help.... what has been your experience? Look forward to chatting with you more about where you're at! Jenny - I don't know the specific modern house you mentioned, but DH and I took a drive down Oakhurst after dinner last night to check it out - there are a small handful of newish-looking houses there - we were just there a couple weeks ago, actually, looking at the 18000 sq ft lot with the 900 sq ft Tahoe-cottage looking home on it (on Rosemont or something?). Looks like it sold! Raising land value.....hooray..... Have a great Wednesday, everyone! Oh - house update, to keep things sort of on topic: survey man apparently communicated with soils guy yesterday, so apparently, he's actually going to deliver his survey map - hooray! Jenny - yes, we like our soils guy quite a bit - efficient, communicative, etc. - we haven't seen the report yet (waiting for survey man), but our architect liked him and we do, too! Email me offline for his contact info, if you'd like....

Linda this is the package I got...it was the Todays Special and it was 399.00. I couldn't let it go this time! Release your creative side with the Cricut Expression and YourStory Craft Bundle. Make large die-cuts for classroom decor, scrapbook layouts, signs, banners and much more with the Cricut machine. Bind and laminate your albums, work reports or school projects with the YourStory machine. These 2 powerful systems give you the ultimate in versatility and make personalizing craft projects - large or small - fun and full of life. Cricut Expression Bundle Includes: Cricut Expression die-cutting machine - measures approx. 22"L x 9"W x 8"H Cutting mat - measures approx. 12"L x 12"W Cutting blade 2 full-content Cricut cartridges: "Walk in My Garden" and "Plantin SchoolBook" 3 Cricut solution cartridges "Indie Art", "Home Accents" and "Camp Out" 3 black Cricut color ink cartridges 2 brown Cricut color ink cartridges Yellow Cricut color ink cartridge Red Cricut color ink cartridge Green Cricut color ink cartridge Orange Cricut color ink cartridge Blue Cricut color ink cartridge Spatula tool Power adaptor Instructional DVD - "Getting to Know Your Cricut Machine" User's manual Registration information card Quick start guide YourStory Binding and Laminating Bundle Includes: YourStory binding and laminating machine - measures approx. 19-1/2"L x 7"W x 8-1/2"H Extra large cover - measures approx. 8-1/2"L x 11"W Large cover - measures approx. 8"L x 8 2 medium covers - measure approx. 7"L x 5"W each 4 small covers - measure approx. 6"L x 4-1/2"W each 6 laminating pouches - measure approx. 9"L x 11-1/2"W each 12 papers - measure approx. 8"L x 8"W each 3 sheets of stickers - measure approx. 8"L x 8"W each Cricut Machine Features: Exciting way to cut letters, shapes and phrases in impressive sizes - up to 12"L x 12"W Multi-cut function - easily cut a wide range of materials including vellum, cardstock, poster board and vinyl; cuts up to 4 times over original cut lines Flip function - easily create a flipped or mirrored image cut of the shape you choose Line-return function - create line breaks between each cut for accurate spacing Center-point function - cuts shapes and centers them on a designated point; use on photographs or patterned paper in the landscape mode Fit-to-length and fit-to-page functions - easily set the size of the length of a designated cut; maximizes the size of the shapes on each page Auto-Fill mode - fills page with as many of the characters selected on the display as will fit on the page Quantity mode - lets you choose the number of cuts you want of those selected on the display Paper-saver mode - automatically arranges selections to take up the least amount of space possible on your paper Shadow option - creates a proportionately larger shadow image of each shape you select Mix and match - use a variety of creative features in the same cut; take advantage of the entire library of existing Cricut cartridges Spatula - allows you to remove finely cut images from cutting mat Colorful markers - substitute for cutting blade to draw designs instead of cutting them LCD screen - shows exactly what you're typing Variety of sizes - cut portrait or landscape Easy to use - no computer necessary 4 languages: English, French, Spanish and German; includes metric options YourStory Machine Features: Large, 12"L x 12"W capacity for binding and laminating Great for unique gifts, memory books and a host of paper crafting projects Personalize books, albums and journals Clean binding system Laminate your own photos and important documents (insurance cards, certificates, licenses and reports) Make your albums, presentations and reports look their very best Additional Information: UL and ETL listed Made in China Comes with a manufacturer's 90-day limited warranty Note: The Cricut machine can cut up to a 12"L x 24"W image if used with the 12"L x 24"W cutting mat and with 12"L x 24"W paper (sold separately).

You two sound very well matched! (As I've said before, your guy sounds like a real gem.) One other secret to making a marriage and blended family work: Always divide the inevitable problems into 'around you' and 'between you', and don't ever let the 'around you' problems creep into the 'between you' territory.

I admit I've only just scanned these posts, and I'm going to go back and read them more closely later to get all the smaller details, but I'll share my impressions based on what I've read so far: SD is in a horrible situation, as we know, with her BM's unreliable nature. Of course, Ima & her DH are in a bad bind, too, as is any parent is who has to step in and pick up another parent's slack. This tends to happen ---in varying degrees of severity--- in one way or another with almost all children of divorce. In that both parents essentially resent doing anything that smacks of what the other parent should be doing, according to them. Even in the best of situations, even when everyone involved is very nice and congenial and caring towards the child, there is bound to be some of this back-and-forth resentment and one or more of the parental figures feeling "put out" by the other. And too often the child is put in the middle of the conflict, and sometimes the resentment starts to get directed at the child, and the parents can easily underestimate how difficult that position is for the child to be in, because many children don't show their upset and sense of basic insecurity. Largely because they haven't yet reached a point in their lives where they can even comprehend it. They are thrust into a no-win situation that just isn't fair. That being said, though, it's very important for SD to begin the lifelong lesson that the number one person she can rely on in this world is herself. It's sad that she has to learn this at such a younger age than many people, but the circumstances are what they are. In the long-run, if handled well, she'll probably be better off for it later. The key distinction that I think is crucial to make in this situation is the difference between making sure SD learns to be more independent and self-reliant not because there is something wrong with HER, but because too often there is something wrong with OTHERS who will not keep their word. This doesn't have to mean either the extreme of breaking the 100% full-on truth about her deadbeat mom nor the extreme of taking the "tough love" (aka "tough s--t") approach of saying "you're 100% on your own, kid, can't help ya". There is a way to impart the helpfulness of the lesson of self-reliance without the risk of it being brutal. It should be explained to her that it's important to start to try being more self-reliant because what other people do/don't do is largely unknown and out of your control. They may or may not do what they promise, so you've got to have a backup plan because YOU are in control of what you yourself do. Explained this way, it doesn't badmouth anyone. And it also doesn't mean that ---at her young age, especially--- the situation should be such where she is truly without a lifeline if she absolutely needs it or if the circumstance at hand is larger than her capacity to deal with it. Everyone, including many fully-grown adults, needs some help every once in a while. Any steps that any adult in her life would make to help her become more self-reliant should be very clearly understood by her to be truly helpful guidance and not a punishment for having a crappy unreliable BM nor for having tried to trust this BM. As long as that is very clear, the goal should be that every year SD is alive she will learn more and more to rely on herself before anyone else. And that's another key distinction: she doesn't have to grow up and be a totally self-reliant person *overnight*. There's no need for any sudden, 'shock-and-awe' type way of teaching these lessons. Every stage of this learning process, and the well-intended reasons for it, should be totally transparent to her so that she actually feels grateful for being shown in a positive way how to cope and feel personally empowered. This way she won't develop the sense of jilted and deprived bitterness that can develop when circumstances & people thrust a person very suddenly and mercilessly into the realization that life can be brutally unfair and ---what's more--- that everyone else is too busy with their own problems to give a damn. Unfortunately, that is too many kids' introduction to the lesson of self-reliance, and it doesn't have to be that traumatic. So in a nutshell, the motto that seems very fitting for SD's main lesson from all this is: "Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst."