Taken! Thank you very much!

Both Grandma-to-be and Great-Grandma, too Can't wait to welcome the baby that's due. So they're hosting a shower to celebrate And let everyone know they can hardly wait!

"I always thought you were not supposed to put where a person is registered on an invitation. And especially not ask for gifts. But oh well." The entire point of a baby or wedding shower is to "shower" the guest of honor with presents, so putting the registry information in with the invitation is typically considered appropriate. It's events that are NOT specifically oriented toward the gifts, such as the wedding itself or a graduation party, where open reference to gifts is inappropriate. Did anyone else think a shower invitation from the cousin's daughter-in-law, whom the OP has met maybe three times, is casting the "gimme" net just a tad far out? Maybe if OP and cousin were very close friends, sure, but good grief! My standard shower gift is onesies. Lots and lots of plain white onesies, because my baby brother (now changing his own kids' diapers, how time flies!) could easily go through a dozen in a day. Budget is pretty much always around $25 unless it's a really close friend, because that's what MY budget can afford. If you shop right you can get a lot of onesies for $25! (I think my record is 10 6-packs that had been put on clearance for $2.50 a bag, down from $10, because the packages were ripped up. So I took them out of the packages, folded them nicely into a pretty box, and went merrily off to the shower - where I got in a viciously polite whispered argument with the host because I refused to play the "baby food tasting" game *retch*). Kiddo often outgrows them well before they wear out anyway. No one I know has done the "clothesline" although I do think it would be pretty cool to do a clothesline specifically to donate to the local women's shelter, and put that right on the invitation; I do find it very ironic that my lower-middle-class family ("you might be a redneck if...") thinks wishing wells are tacky. Diapers can be tricky, unless a specific type is noted on the registry, because of that whole cloth-vs-disposable thing. There are some verrrrry strong feelings on that subject! I do appreciate registries, both for weddings and baby showers, if I'm not very close to the recipient because it tells me what the recipients are interested in - I don't necessarily need to purchase something off the list, but if I see 20 Winnie the Pooh items on a baby shower list, that tells me that Mum is diggin' Pooh and might appreciate some mint-condition vintage Pooh books to read to her child or decorate a shelf in the nursery. It also does indicate to me what's NOT really welcome. For instance, if I see on the registry that everything the parents chose is either khaki, sage, and/or cream (such as at the last shower I attended), it's a pretty good bet that the parents are unlikely to be overly enthusiastic over primary colors or the old pink/blue routine.

I agree that what makes this feel over the top is the sheer number of things in such a short time. But I agree with a previous poster that, although I, too, think some of them are kind of silly, especially the gender reveal stuff, none of them is unprecedented or bizarre. Like, why do you put the word “registry” in quotation marks? Surely you have heard of bridal and baby registries before. Many people don’t like them, but they are not considered rude per se; it’s only pushing them on people who have not asked for them or expecting guests to buy only gifts that the recipients have chosen for themselves that is considered rude. You don’t have to send a gift at all, although it is certainly customary if you attend a shower or a wedding, and if you do send a gift, you do not need to limit yourself to registered items, cash, or gift cards. You can choose or make a gift that you want to give. In other words, if you don’t like the registry, just ignore it. I can’t help but notice that you complain both that you ARE invited to events and that you WEREN’T invited to an event. People send invitations not only us gift grabs, but also to show people that they consider them connected and want them to feel included. What is your own motive when you send an invitation or share news? I assume it is not just to get gifts. Well, these are people you don’t even know, but you are ascribing only the worst possible motives to their having sent you invitations and announcements. That said, I would be rolling my eyes at some of the stuff, too.