I think you should wait a while before doing any more changes. I mean this in a nice way, but I think you have renovation addiction. Your kitchen was beautiful when you first added the counters. It was beautiful when you painted it all grey a few weeks ago and I am sure it is still beautiful now that it is two tone again. I will be honest I liked it best all grey and think two tone is a 2000's concept not as fitting as all one tone in an older home but that is just my own preference. I think something other than your cab colors is not working in your home or maybe your life and you are using your kitchen as a way to exercise control over something bigger that is probally out of your control and than when you have finished trying to control the cab situation you are feeling still empty or dissatisfied because the real issue is still present. I think you should step away from the kitchen for a bit of time and assess it later and see if it works then.
I am not judging you and may be off base but I have been guilty of what I think you may be doing and thought I might be able to offer what worked for me and that was stepping away from the reno until other problems in my life were resolved.

I'm afraid I keep looking at my cabs and how they change in the real natural light and can't stand the idea of not "fixing" that.

I have made myself STOP.
I'm not going to give them an 8th (or so) coat of paint until I'm much farther done with the house.

I've tried to assimilate the idea that I have to step back and live with things a bit. I just can't go adjusting this and that at every instant I think of it.

Have you got your window treatments in? Have you other areas you're looking at addressing? Adjacent rooms? How about just a moratorium on work for a bit? It sounds like you've painted your bummy off and THAT is exhausting.

So rest a bit before you start painting again. And remember SAMPLES first.

I'm confused I just looked at your kitchen on your blog. Were the lowers changed from black to gray ? I think the gray & white is beautiful.
I agree with CEfreeman, live with it awhile, the lighting changes everything. I love my kitchen light(the painted wall colors) in the morning and hate the afternoon light(that's when the pendants and livingroom lights get turned on).
If the uppers are cotton ball(a true white you said, right ?) you might be happier if you match the wall/ceiling to the upper cabinets BUT try a large sample area first before you go through the hassle. Many times I see two tone and the uppers blend in well with the wall color(says me who painted the walls before I picked out the cabinets-but I will live with it for awhile...if I ever get the cabinets :P)
It's normal to want to change something that you just feel maybe slightly off color wise(color can be difficult).

Theresse,

I liked it before and it sounds nice now (only wondering about the two whites together?)

I second the advice to live with it awhile.

And pics, please, since it's always a pleasure to see your handsome kitch.

On a personal note my DH is doing fine, with no fusses from the device. He told me yesterday that now he finds it reassuring. Humpf! Still mourning the flying thing, though. Hope your DH is faring well.

L.

I would not paint the ceiling the same color as the cabinets. I painted my white ceiling a cream to give them a separation from the white cabinets.

I would live with it and not be in a rush to change things. If it still doesn't feel right after a while, it sounds like a lighter shade of the lower cabinet color -- something with some blue or grey might be a nice off-white direction to try -- but no need to rush into things. Sometimes you have to let things settle a bit.

With respect, give it a rest. It's like hating an outfit shortly before you have to leave the house and then you start trying on other things and clothes begin flying all over the room. Suddenly nothing looks right.

The new things in my kitchen that initially felt so foreign and wrong are beginning to grow on me and become familiar. Yeah, it's different, but it's still my kitchen.

I agree about waiting at least a week.
Then, perhaps matching the ceiling to the uppers, lowers or a half/half mix of upper and lower colors (I love to experiment with mixing)....
In any case, I think your kitchen is one of the loveliest around, FWIW. You know it is right up my alley and I bet it looks better than you are seeing at the moment.

Therese, pictures would be helpful, but are you sure you aren't in just a little "shell shock" right now? How long did you have them all gray? The sudden change might be a little too shocking at first, but if you've seen the two tones in other kitchens that you liked, then you may find this will work as well.
Did painting the cabinets white bring out the "Peachy" color in the ceilings and trim? I don't think I would like that, but pictures may help see if they compliment one another or are a peach against a white.
I have a large sample of BM Linen white hanging over one of my cabinets. I didn't know it had a hint of peach to it! I'll be rethinking that sample, don't want ANY pink, peachy, green tones!
That might be what's wrong? The two whites don't compliment one another? Maybe a white on the ceiling that has the same undertones as the Cotton Ball?
In any case, good luck, I've learned that color can drive one out of their mind!

I love this forum and all the honesty!! :)

I have to live with it a while just cause the painters are almost done and we have a huge annual neighborhood easter potluck on Sunday. And I totally get what you're all saying about giving it a rest, addiction, something going on in my life (yikes) and all else. That said (and I'm truly not defensive - I love you guys!), the new white's not alarming but is pretty ridiculous if you're into these nuances like I am - those of you who are will get it I think when I show you a pic. But most people could care less. It's not like it's bright yellow that has no place. ;) It was a lame attempt to go from a kitchen that was overpowered by a gray that looks pretty dark in my kitchen except for a couple hours each day, to something a bit more cheerful. I wasn't doing the painting myself and the painter and contractor team have been doing all kinds of useful work on my house including the finishing touches in kitchen e.g. hardware that never got replaced in a few places, so I thought "hey this is my last chance (since I'm sure as hell not going to do it myself - haha) to try throwing in a bit more white, before they leave (as many of you had suggested I do on another thread). I'm not wringing my hands about it and can totally live with it a while, but because the painter's about to paint the ceiling anyway since in-ceiling speakers were just installed, I thought making it a lighter paint might make the cabinets seem less all on their own/sticking out so much.

HOWEVER, lascatx, I'm glad you warned me about that, thank you. And Roarah, the minute the white was up, I came to the same conclusion you just shared with me: the way it would have looked a hundred years ago - the classic look - would have been to have it all gray and that's what felt right, aside from my wishing it weren't so dark. In other words that wins out over the light issue. Even the nickel hardware I added had brightened things up in their own way (you guys haven't seen it yet), and opening up the transom with new hardware, etc. So when I get around to it I'll make the uppers AND the center window (already painted gray now), gray. I'm in no real rush as there won't be time now before the big party so I won't have to worry about it for a while. I just want to make a good and final decision since that window area had never been painted yet - just primed - and so I can FINALLY be done iwth the kitchen!! I think I'd paid too much attention to the comments from people in that other thread wanting the white back in my kitchen instead of just sticking with what is classic in an old home. And they were right to think white helps, but it can be done with accessories and lamp shades etc.

Liriodendron - thank you for telling me how he's doing! I've been meaning to write you forever to ask if he's feeling better with it in. Wow - what a relief. I'll have to pass it on to my ever-reluctant husband. I'm so happy he's better and that you're able to sighhhh with relief at long last!! Oh man you have been through the ringer. I can only imagine the horror you dealt with. Feel free to call/write anytime and I'm sure you'll be hearing from us again too. Hugs, and best wishes (and congratulations) to your man!

I am SUCH a narcissist for writing so much all that time (blush blush blush)!

theresse...i've only commented a time or two on your posts, but I couldn't let your last line pass w/o comment. Please don't be hard on yourself...what you may label as narcissism (even half joking), may in fact just be a desire to connect. Perhaps I am way off base and you have a full life of close friends/family to connect with, but I know that most people (including myself) probably come to these communities not necessarily for the topic at hand, but more likely for the deeper connections to people that are sometimes missing in our face-to-face lives these days. Nothing wrong with that...

I, too, think you should live with the paint on the cabs. I doubt you ruined any of your kitchen's charm. And although a pain, it's only paint. You can paint it again if you truly aren't happy in the space. :)

Theresse I did not mean to imply that a two tone kitchen can not peacefully and beautifully exist in an older home. I liked your orginal white and grey kitchen a whole lot i only meant to say that for me the all grey was my favorite. I loved the all grey but that was in a photo and if after living with the white for a while it sings to you and works better in the space in real life then appropriateness no longer matters and maybe the two tone should have been done a hundred years ago. You know the real space better than us.
I was only worried that maybe you are acting to soon because your final product is not meeting your vision or expectations intially and that maybe living with something and letting go of expectations might help to produce a satisfaction with you and your relationship to your kitchen.
You have a wonderful kitchen and have done such a lovely job and made beautiful choices and I just do not want for you to forget that! I hope you enjoy your wonderful kitchen this weekend!!!

Well since it has been said I will add I too absolutely loved the all Fieldsone! I am not afraid of dark, my first choice was gray, I lost and we have dark red cabs with soapstone. I am sure the gray/white looks beautiful too.

Theresse -- can you post pictures so we can better advise you?
Or, perhaps I missed the new pictures of your white uppers?

Sorry these pics are so lousy - had to use the iphone. Wish I could find my missing SD card for my real camera! Obviously ceiling isn't done and there's blue tape above the drip rail under the sink, etc. I don't know why this always happens in my photos but in this one it looks as though the ceiling's a different color from the walls but it's not. Also the white cab seems almost to match the walls which it doesn't.

This pic was just after they got the transom opened (yay!) but before taking the paint off and installing the hardware...sorry about the messy sink/countertop. OMG you guys...having in-ceiling speakers is AMAZING for this girl who was really cut off from the music in the kitchen which is so far from the living room stereo speakers until now! It's one of the best things that's ever happened to me - or at least it feels like it! Pandora on the new receiver is amazing too (as is Netflix via the internet - this is all new to me! :)

Looking at the wall of gray - the following pic was taken when windows above sink were still only primed (white) and upper cabs on either side of them were painted the gray color prior to my deciding to brighten up things more by painting them white and changing the windows to gray. Transom window wasn't done then, nor had the little island had the makeover it now has ;) and the pot rack's now gone.

Great - now my battery's about to die before I get to respond to individual posts (!) so I'll respond after I wake in the morning! Sorry about that!

P.s. in response to past posts about lightening up the room, I just don't think I have it in me to pay for canned lighting (the electrician). At least no time soon. I never responded to that before which is why I bring it up now.

p.p.s. yes I can live with this - at least for now and maybe I'll like it more later!

Ok I'm back (plugged the laptop in).

Hlove - I think there's some truth to that - that at times it gets isolating being a stay-at-home-mom. I'm a pretty social butterfly so I'm not as isolated as many moms (I go out for mom's night out and hang out with friends maybe more than some extremely devoted wives/mothers do) ;) but yes I still want to connect on some other level through forums occasionally. The topic at hand does bring me in but doing so has allowed me to get to know some of this forum's great people and that has its own special place in my heart, different as it is. ! I also like how I can be in my jammies and chat any time of the night if I have insomnia and there's something about the anonymity factor that's sorta comforting too, don't you think? All that said, I really am a lot like my chatty father and just seem to like to hear myself talk (plus I'm a fast typist). I just go on and on and on and on..... yeah I think there's some narcissism in there honestly! : - o I hate to admit that but it's true. I just appreciate those of you that tolerate it. See - I've just done it right there. Look how long this paragraph is!!! ;) Thanks for your kind words about the kitchen. I'll sit with it as I have no choice anyway - haha.

Roarah - I completely understand and STILL agree with you anyway! :) It just felt complete before (not that the window and upper cabs were ever gray at the same time but I could tell it would have had this relaxed, finished, symmetrical, complete feeling about it, even if a bit on the dark side). I agree about sitting with it a while and seeing how I feel over time. I know it's an adjustment that I need to at least consider getting used to. I wish you could see it in person - it's so true about how different it is in the pics! Thanks for your encouraging words! It is after all just a kitchen (and not a very big one at that)!

Eandhl - hahaha thank you for your honesty!! How can I see your kitchen pics? I never can figure out that on this website - how to actually hunt down others' pictures. Actually that sounds fun and different. In the beginning, Sally Wheat's kitchen that inspired me seemed so new and different but then I soon realized that (I think) she got the idea when Martha Stewart did a gray kitchen. Now, I'm seeing a lot more gray kitchens but not a lot of red ones! :) Thank you...

Francoise47 - there you go! Do these pics help? It's hard to tell, not having been able to use a real (decent) camera.

Thanks again everyone.

Theresse --

Thanks for posting the pictures!
I always love seeing pictures of your lovely kitchen.

This is a big help with visualizing. I like the newly white upper cabinets.
But I think it might help if you incorporate more of the same white
elsewhere in the kitchen to help make those upper white cabinets feel more integrated.
This would make the kitchen two-toned in a more balanced way.
But where to put more white? On the trim and window above the sink?
On the doors and the 'wall of gray'?

I'm happy you are enjoying your kitchen ceiling speakers!

It definitely is a beautiful kitchen, and I agree with you about painting the ceiling white. The white cabs blend in well with the grey, it has a lot of character.

I don't think you have enough wall cabinets to make this look work. I liked them gray. I could see something two shades DARKER and shinier than your wall color - in other words much more cream - but I don't think it would work as well as the gray. I could also see a stronger accent color IF you had other things that could tie in - like a robin's egg blue.

Painting the ceiling lighter(but still not brilliant white) will cause the room to look a bit taller but I don't think it will help the cabinets blend in.

I love the addition of the white on the cabs! To me that takes it from pretty (in all gray) to just the right fillip of differentness/unexpectedness. Like a great outfit that fits well and makes you feel pretty and easy that's cut or draped in an unusual way. All you need now is a splash of some color you love in a bowl, or artwork, or painted side chair and you are done!

L

Kitchens of old were dark, your kitchen is already too modern looking to go for 100% authentic so why not embrace a brighter, updated version. IMO the kitchen looked best with the uppers, trim and wall of built in cabinetry painted white and just the lowers in gray. The painted trim reminds me of the 80's attempt at colonial and disconnects the kitchen from the rest of the house. And paint the ceiling white. PS - I love your kitchen so much, I would probably be happy with any version of it.

theresse-I don't know...I really like the white cabs! But online, of course, never looks the same as IRL. From here, I think they tie in with the sink and the light fixtures. What may be the problem is the ceiling. What if you did a very light blue ceiling? A friend has this in her 19th c. home and it looks wonderful! I'm thinking of doing that throughout my 19 c. home, too...but not for a while as I think that's one painting job I'd hire out!

As for the more personal stuff, I'm a stay-at-home mom, too. It can definitely be isolating, even if you know other SAHM's. I also find that I wish I had more free time to do the creative things I like to do (like decorating!), so coming on boards like this "feeds" my creative side. I definitely resonated with your narcissism comment...I have struggled with this, myself. And to make matters worse, my DH is the most giving (to a fault) person you could meet...so I often feel guilty. However, I also have to give myself credit for staying at home with the kids and know that I am giving of myself in that way.

Anyway, I bet the "right" answer will come to you re: the kitchen. My kitchen is done, and I'm still looking around to see what I may have missed. :)

Another vote for white cabs and window trim. If I were in a small room with all that dark gray you'd have to hide all sharp objects.

Theresse, I've loved every variation on your kitchen I've seen so far (though it was a bit darker than I could live with when all gray).

However, since your door and transom are painted to match the cabinets they adjoin, it seems to me that your window over the sink should also match the cabinets flanking it. Does the contrast throw anyone else off, or am I just short-sighted and not seeing the big picture of trim in the house?

I'd also want to paint the wall of cabinets around the door white to tie in with the uppers, but that would be a lot of work and I don't think you can go wrong no matter what you decide (unless you get a hankering for lime green, that is)! ;)

I meant to also say that I can relate to your use of this board as a little social (and narcissistic) outlet! But I don't think your second guessing your choices is necessarily a sign of renovation addiction. It's like we spend so much time making the decisions for how to "get it right" that it's not done until it's "right". Sometimes you can spot right and wrong while while doing paint sampling...sometimes it doesn't become apparent until the project is (supposedly) done. Nevertheless, there are more important things to worry about, so I suppose the reminders about priorities and life balance don't hurt!

I agree with several others - you can't mess up this kitchen! Every picture you've shown looks beautiful. The white cabs in the latest pics seem to break up the gray, which is really nice. (BTW, I love the Sally Wheat kitchen!) I think you've made some great choices for your kitchen (countertop, BS, paint, etc.) so far, so just do what feels right to you. This site is awesome, but for every opinion, there's usually on opposing opinion. Also, who says it has to be 100% period accurate? I love period kitchens, more than most, but this is your kitchen. Thanks for sharing it!

I am agreeing with Jessicaml's suggestions re the trim color around the window
and the 'wall of gray' on the side of your kitchen with the door.

The picture below of a Todd Hansen kitchen is not your style at all.
But, notice that the two-tone scheme works so well because your eye is carried around the room with one color of the white uppers all in one horizontal band and the warm wood lowers in another horizontal band:

[

[traditional kitchen design[(https://www.houzz.com/photos/traditional-kitchen-ideas-phbr1-bp~t_709~s_2107) by minneapolis architect Christine Albertsson and Todd Hansen

Another example (from DecorPad) of how the two-tone scheme works harmoniously unify the kitchen:

{{gwi:1774733}}

Francoise47 - I know what you mean about the white but at this point I feel like I'm going to leave it be and then when/if I paint again, it'll probably be gray just to keep it all consistent. I just can't find the right place to add white anywhere else - no matter how hard I try to imagine a good place. I think it would look even stranger. I might eventually add something lighter to the ceiling, we'll see. I do love the speakers, thanks!

Mitchdesj - thanks - that's probably what I'll do (eventually paint the ceiling white or something lighter). Or, because the upper cabs are near the window, their being gray isn't as dark as that wall of gray is so it'll probably be fine if I go back to gray there eventually - fresh and happy as the white looks. I just keep adding white where I can and that helps (white bowl on island for example). Thanks!

Bmorepanic - you nailed it, I think. I'll leave 'em white for a while just cause I'm taking that badly-needed break now that the guys are finally gone, and if I do any more painting in the future it'll most likely be to make the uppers the gray again. It just looks more balanced and consistent and period-appropriate, yada yada. But it doesn't look *bad* for now at all - especially to those who aren't looking at it the way we all do here! ;) Thanks!

Liriodendron - wow - thanks for that uplifting, positive juju feedback! :) I'm keeping them white for now and I see what you mean. That's such a nice way of looking at it! I had a huge Easter brunch that we do with our neighbors every year and the little changes resulted in some big compliments that day. Everyone seemed to notice the changes and loved them (not sure if it was adding more white or adding polished nickel hardware or giving our kitchen island a makeover or what but people were so great about the kitchen that day. Loved having the in-ceiling speakers in there too, for the party. SO glad I did that! Thanks again.

Athomeinva - thanks for your honest opinion! I had it all white for soooo long (and then had just those lowers gray as you said, for what felt like so long) that I really felt i needed something new. I agree that nothing cheers up that kitchen better than some white but I just can't go back to all that white after how long it took to get where I finally am. I also agree that it would balance things out better that way than this way, hence my original post. There's happy snappy white then there's sultry sophisticated gray and the gray's working fine...but if anything the white that is there is a bit odd now so might go back to gray eventually. When it's all gray, it's interesting how much the white marble, the white sink, the white hood/stove and the white light shades POP though - so that'll be something anyway. I"ve always been a white kitchen girl - I'm right there with you in spirit - but it's just been too many years of having a white kichen, you know? As for the 80's colonial look, I know what you mean sort of but not really...I remember in the 80's a bunch of ridiculous ducks and lots of blue in kitchens but I don't remember this so much. I remember people painted the insides of their cab door panels different colors from the frames. That I remember! What I have going on (and what admittedly is the current trend which I'll probably tire of pretty quickly) is the imitation of woodwork being unpainted, with lighter walls, only it's painted darker, with lighter walls. That's very craftsman (and possibly also victorian, I'm not sure). There was a resurgence I think during the 40's or 50's too, wasn't there? Anyway, blah blah, sorry. I like to hear myself talk. Blech! ;) Thanks!

hlove - have always considered a light blue ceiling. Not sure if adding a third color might not be a bit too much for this kitchen though, but I've thought a lot about doing just that and i'll still keep it in mind, thanks! Thanks for understanding the narcissism comment, too! ;)

Linelle - thank you! Duly noted! I hear you - it's been a tough transition, having all that darkness. But I'm just too tired by it all to redo that much. Maybe later! That kitchen's pretty dark no matter what. But yeah there's no denying it's a lot darker looking that when it was all white!

Jessicaml - thanks - I totally agree about your contrast-throws-us-off comment re. the white cabs being the only white. I think both your thoughts make a lot of sense. Either all gray, or all white except for the lowers which could stay the gray (as I had it)! So for now, I just wait and see how I feel and then at some point in the future I can re-paint either a little, or a lot! Re. the comment about renovation addiction, I agree with you that I don't think I have it like some people have it. I deal with the kitchen for a while, then let it go cause I don't have the time or money to deal with it, then I pick it up again every so often...never doing so because I'm fussing over something that can never be right but rather cause it never got done in the first place! E.g. the window was painted with just white primer for the longest time and it's only after I finally painted it that things became clearer re. the whole picture. I just couldn't tell till I got that far. Truth be told, I really like to get things done and then be done with it. This kitchen's been going on forever and a day - it's been pretty ridiculous! But I do like updating in little ways every so often e.g. with new kitchen towels or art or what have you! Anyway, thanks for the reassuring comment (that I'm not losing my marbles - haha)!

Lake Girl - thanks very much for the positive attitude and the positive feedback! The main thing is that it's clean and fresh with new hardware and a "new" island and music in there at long last...it just feels like something I no longer have to feel so embarrassed about, you know? Well except for the white 12 year-old GE electric stove, but I'll save that for another day!

Francoise47 - yes - I totally agree and I LOVE those kitchens! Again though, I needed a change after having it that way for so long - and a little sophistication - and now that so many people's kitchens are white now, I just can't go back in that direction for a while. Two-toned is great but still won't work as well without doing it the way you're suggesting and the way you're suggesting is just something I lived with for too long, you know? But once I'm not feeling so sick of it all, I'll consider moving back in that direction. I just wish the white kitchen craze would die down a wee bit first! : - / Thanks again!

Hi theresse - When we built in 1996, everyone said white cabs were OUT, but I had wood at the time, and had always wanted white. Sure white might not be the hottest thing going at the time .(I was convinced that white hadn't really been out in 60 yrs, because my grandma's kitchen was white from like the 30's, even though I'm pretty sure her's were metal.) Anyway I used white cabs, and still have them now. If I built a new house, the cabs would most likely be white. My advice is do what you love! The hardest decision are the things that you really don't feel strongly about, like backsplashes for me. Oh well, all the best!