I am missing something. Cats do not prey on babies. What is the problem? Does she have a problem, other than your worrying about it?

I don't see a problem. Just sounds like an old wives tale scare.

Who the hell said anything about preying on babies? :rolling eyes: But a cat climbing in a baby's crib is unacceptable.
That is my biggest worry, plus all the cat hair where ever you may lay the newborn down.

Four cats in a small apartment is a lot but cat hair never hurt anyone as far as I know. When the baby starts crawling your DIL might just want to vacuum more frequently.

Most cats want nothing to do with noisy babies so I wouldn't worry about it -- chances are they will stay away.

PS: My mother tells me that while pg with me, our cat started sleeping in the crib she had set up and it really worried her. Once I arrived though he wanted nothing to do with the me or the crib.

Also, if the crib becomes an issue, just keep the door shut.

I imagine it's normal for a soon-to-be-grandparent to worry about things, but try not to. People with pet cats, even four of them, have had babies and have worked things out.

The only thing I might suggest is that, if he doesn't already, during the pregnancy your son should be the one to clean out the litter boxes.

Cats can be resentful of a new baby---peeing/defecating in unusual places/etc.

I agree about the old wives tale thing---but most old wives tales do have some basis in truth. For instance, the tale about cats smothering a baby by lying over its face has some truth. Babies are warmer than adults---cats like the warmth. Many cats do 'get' the baby part---they seem to understand the new arrival is like a very large kitten. And cats do lay in what seems to us to be very uncomfortable positions---like half on a pillow---or a baby.

And, we are just mow realizing babies can smother by being put to sleep on their stomach---a once common practice. Couple that with a family cat----and the cat gets the blame.

So, include the cats in the preparation of the nursery so thay get used to the change. Some folks I know of also had their cats lie on Mom's belly---figuring the cat will 'get' it about the new comer. That seems to me to be possible.

However, the cats should not be allowed in the nursery during nap/bed time---or without close supervision.

Put a screen door in the baby's room instead of the wooden door. Cats can look in but not get in. Cats usually stay away from a baby. Mine took one look at my grandkids and ran till they were old enough to relate to. Kids raised with pets have less allergies than kids that aren't. Cat hair hurts no one..and cats don't smother babies.

Who the hell? Nice.

I think if your poor DIL has common sense, which I suspect she must by now, she should have her bases covered. Make sure the cats are wormed. Not let them sleep on the infant, which most cats don't want anyway. That's why we have doors.

I'll ask again; Does mom have a problem?

I would have been dead long ago if cat hair were toxic. As for babies and cats - babies make frightening noises, so give the cats extra space and reassurance during this difficult time.

I would definitely exercise some caution here. I dont care who says cats dont prey on babies,that is not the point.

I have had my own cat sleep on my face before at night and I woke up and couldnt breathe. So one could assume how easy it would be for them to accidently sufficate a baby.

Keep the cats out of the baby's room for sure.Handymac gave excellent advice.

Jenuwin --

Regarding your concern about cats in the crib, there are special nets made to cover cribs, both to keep pets out and to keep older babies in.

Regarding your concern about cat hair, regular brushing/combing of the cats, an air filter and a washable sofa cover make all the difference in our 3-cat home.

With some simple modifications the new grandbaby should be fine. I know your worry stems from love, but again, please try to relax. They will figure things out.

Will the baby be sleeping in mom and dad's room in the beginning? Maybe they could shut the cats out at night. Also, baby can sleep in a room with the door closed if mom has a baby monitor. I'm sure everything will work out ok.

One thing I can mention though is that your daughter needs to be careful when changing the cats' litter box while she is pregnant. There is some danger of toxoplasmosis from infected cats. She should probably wear gloves or be extra sure to wash her hands really well after litter box duty. I think the incidence of this infection among pregnant women is small, but you don't want to take any chances.

Many years ago I had multiple babies (twins) and multiple cats. It worked out fine.

The cats can be tested for toxoplasmosis. But in any case a pregnant woman shouldn't clean the litter box.

Many new parents want the baby to sleep in the same room or in the same bed. For the first couple of months I discouraged the cats from sleeping with us. But I can't remember that it was a problem, or that the cats slept with the babies. One of the cats had kittens at the same time (this was 39 years ago, before we all realized the problem of cat overpopulation) and it seemed that nursing was going on everywhere at just about every moment!

The cats mainly seemed to be concerned that I wasn't keeping the babies' heads clean enough, and would wash their scalps when I was feeding them. It did seem to help the cradle cap.

The house should of course be kept clean, but hopefully that would be the case anyway.

jcin,

Great story! Thanks for sharing it (and for nursing your babies 39 years ago).

My sister had three babies while she had cats as pets, plus now her grandkids all sleep over at her place (she still has cats) and she has never had anything untoward happen. No problems whatsoever.

"The cats mainly seemed to be concerned that I wasn't keeping the babies' heads clean enough, and would wash their scalps when I was feeding them. It did seem to help the cradle cap."

That one made me LOL.

I wanted to add that I truly think dogs and babies/toddlers deserve much more concern than cats. Also, you said she lives in a "small apartment." Just shut the door to the crib. When I brought my DD home from the hospital I put her in the nursery and turned on the baby monitor. Receiver was on my nightstand. What a joke -- you could hear that baby cry from downstairs and five rooms away -- no monitor was ever necessary (and I live in a 2600 SF house).

We have 3 dogs and a toddler--give your DIL a nice supply of lint rollers to clean the hair from the babies clothes after rolling around on the floor. A little hair never hurt anyone.

De

I am sure you mean well, but you are starting off on the wrong foot if you start telling your DIL how to deal with her cats or her child. The advice is so obvious (close the door and get a monitor, don't let the cats sleep with the baby, clean up the floor so the child is not covered in fur, etc.) that you risk seriously insulting her if you give her this advice. If the advice you really want to give her is that she should get rid of 2 cats (based on you writing that 1-2 cats is ok) then you are REALLY taking a chance offering that advice.

Sue above is absolutely right, and I hope you will re-read her post and take the message to heart.

Your DIL will become very resentful if you try to micromanage her pregnancy and her care for the baby. You want to have a good relationship with her at this special time. She will love the baby as only a mother does, and she will take good care of the little one. I would not say one word about the cats. If they are a problem, your DIL will figure it out herself.

I agree with that too.Maybe a better way would be to ask her DIL politely if SHE has any concerns about it or what her plans are?
I'm sure she will,because all new mothers have questions/concerns about everything.
My lovely mother in law tried to tell me there was no such thing as toxoplasmosis when I told my husband he had to change the litter box.Unfortunately,my husband refused to change the litter so I had to find the cats another home!
I wasnt going to put my unborn child at risk.

I was very worried about how our cats would react when we brought our new baby home a few years ago. Our cats were 12 at the time, so long use to being the center of attention. As we set up the baby's stuff, it was never off limits to the cats, we didn't want them to feel misplaced. After all, the baby was joining an existing family that included cats.

Cat hair is good for little ones. Kids who are raised with cats are less likely to have certain medical problems- asthma for instance.

Most cats really don't like babies all that well. They are loud and unpredictable. When we brought our DD home, we put a chair by the bassinet so the cats could sit at the edge and check her out as much as they wanted. Our girl cat hopped in the bassinet the first day and curled up, but the first time the baby wailed, she left and never got back in there! :)

When I was about 7m PG, my DMIL informed my husband that we were going to have to get rid of our cats after the baby was born, which totally offended him, but struck me as typical for her. This was based on the fact that B&SIL alienated their cats after they had a baby, so the cats acted up, and they got rid of them. Personally I don't believe in shutting cats away from babies, it will stress them more to not know what is going on (hence the acting up), and once they figure it out they will probably be disinterested anyway.

Cats and kids are fine together. If you have concerns, gently ask your son if *he* has any concerns about the cats once the baby arrives, but don't push your opinion or will on them, it will only breed resentment.

GL.

Boy does this thread take me back, and not in a good way. I had the MIL from H*LL 27 years ago when I was pregnant. I had the baby at home with midwives, everything was peachy. She drove down the next day and when my then-husband timidly explained to her that I didn't want her to smoke in the house because of our one day old baby, she got mad and said, "Well, all of this cat hair in the house will do him more harm than my cigarette smoke." And she was a registered nurse! Grrrrrrr. BTW, we had one cat at the time...

If I were the DIL, I would not appreciate being pressured to give up my cats. For everyone's protection, babies/children and animals should never be left unsupervised, even if there is just one cat or dog. That is just common sense. So as long as there is supervision, I really don't see what the problem is.

If you are asked for advice, you'll be ready with good "suggestions"...Years ago, I worked with a gal that was pregnant and while setting up the crib, she filled it with balloons...When the cats would jump in, the balloons would either bounce around or pop...After a couple of times, the cats never bothered with the crib....Good luck with that new baby and enjoy (the baby and the cats)....

Yeah petaloid,put that baby in a cage and let the cats have run of the house!
I'm sure your DS and DIL will use good sense where cats and baby are concerned.

My only suggestion would be to either A) keep babys door closed, as soon as baby stuff is in that room. Baby or no baby. Or B) Place balloons, tinfoil sticky tape, whatever, around anything important.

My friend had a baby over a year ago now. But for 3 months before the baby arrived, she had the nursery set up.

One day she realised her cat had been spraying everything in that room. He ruined all the crib bedding and stuffed animals they'd put in the crib, and the small rug they'd put on the floor, as well as the cushion on the new rocking chair.

I'd never get rid of any of my pets when I have kids, unless they prove to be a danger to my children.

But I also agree, to not push any opinions or advice on her. Advice is only appreciated when it's asked for.

I have two cats. Neither one of them had any interest in the crib, with or without baby. They would snuggle onto a baby blanket left on the floor, couch or chair however. If I was napping with the baby, they would come and lie with me with maybe a single paw on the edge of the blanket or the baby's foot LOL, but unless I was involved they wanted nothing to do with that noisy, stinky thing we brought home.

Once in a while the younger cat would sneak a nap in the baby carrier (empty of course).

After the baby started moving around more? Forget it. They would walk a wide circle around the door of her room, let alone go in there LOL.

Other than not cleaning the litter box, I can't see any reason to be concerned about the cats at all. My MIL cried and cried and insisted the cats would smother the baby ("Steal her breath") or attack her, or she would choke on cat hair. Now, I am not the best housekeeper. But to my knowledge there are no chunks of cat hair lying around for babies to choke on!

I say don't be worried unless a problem presents itself (and it would more likely be an issue like the cats peeing in the baby's room to voice disapproval or something).

Dances.

quote..If I were the DIL, I would not appreciate being pressured to give up my cats..unquote

I don't see that comment anywhere in my post, nor would I do such a thing. That is why I am posting HERE and not voicing my worry to THEM.

"I don't think 1 or even 2 would be a problem, but 4??"

"To me the baby has to come first, no matter what."

sure sounds to me like you already had decided that she should get rid of some pets & you phrased your "question" so that people would know the answer you wanted.

You want her to get rid of a couple of cats, & you want forum members to provide support or ammunition.

Instead, you've been given some excellent advice on pets & on relationship management, & you haven't even offered a "thank you" for any of it, you've just defended something that you said you didn't do.

It doesn't sound like they think any change or decision is called for, but if circumstances do necessitate a decision, it's *their* decision-

If I were in your boots, I would not breathe one single negative word to either one of these young adult people who are starting *their* family:

If you're sensitive to the suggestion on this forum that you're meddling, just hint to the parents-to-be that you have an opinion on this personal matter & see what kind of reaction it provokes.

Other than the litter box, the only concern is if the baby just so happens to be allergic to cats, I don't know what the percentage is of people being allergic though. My son was allergic, took months before we figured out it was the cat making him sick.

I just wanted to add out of all the people posting I was the only one that had a child that was allergic to kitties So really the chances of this happen are probably very slim.

I had two cats and two babies born a year apart. The cats never bothered the babies, never attacked them, never tried to get in bed with them. The cats were aware of the children in the house but didn't seem to mind at all. I still petted my cats and gave them good food. We all got along fine. My MIL said she had heard that cats suck the breath out of babies because they smell milk. Old wives tale. Not true. My MIL hates all animals and specifically fears pets , dogs and cats.

Thank you all for your help and advice.
Sylvia, your's were the only posts I scrolled by. You are a know it all that knows actually nothing.
Everyone else was quite helpful.