It may not be appropriate for this incident, but in other sad occasions, sometimes it would be helpful if someone brought paper plates, plastic utensils, paper cups. both hot & cold, garbage bags and napkins. In this case, Mac 7 cheese is something every likes. How thoughtful of you. Dottie

I often take a tray of fruit and sweet rolls. Have been told is was especially welcome as close family often
feel they don't want or can't eat a full meal.
Suzi

I think anything you bring her would be appreciated... It may be a regional thing but personally, I don't think of Mac and Cheese as a meal, but more of a side dish. It would be like bringing green beans or potato salad... Still, I'm sure she would appreciate it.

If you don't want to do a full meal... which may not really be needed now anyway... I would consider the fruit tray mentioned above, or maybe a breatfast type cake that could be eaten at any time of day. If you want to go all out... maybe a smaller precooked/sliced ham with some rolls she could eat on as she likes for a few days...I would guesss people will proably visit/stop by - even family members in town to go over things, etc... But don't over think it, just bring whatever you want... I'm sure she'll like anything...

A large pan of lasagna is always good. It freezes well should there be leftovers.

What I have been doing is taking drinks. I always have on hand one of the big plastic tubs, fill it with ice and put all kinds of drinks in it. I pick up canned drinks on sale all the time and then usually pick up some juice boxes for little ones. The first time I did this for a neighbor they told me after all was over that this was the most helpful thing. If kept in a garage thr drinks stay cold for several days. You always offer someone a drink.. I usually send a tub of lemonade to fix, too. I pick them up when they are buy one get one free. Always an appreciated gift.... A couple neighbors could go together on it, too.

Susie

My DF recently lost her DH suddenly.

I pondered over what to take, and decided on this:

Farmers Casserole
3 cups frozen shredded hash browns
3/4 cup shredded Monterey Jack cheese
1 cup diced cooked ham
1/4 cup chopped green onions
4 eggs
1 can (12 oz) evaporated milk
1/4 tsp pepper
1/8 tsp salt

Directions
Place potatoes in an 8 in square baking dish.
Sprinkle with cheese, ham and onions.
Beat eggs, milk, pepper and salt; pour over all.
Cover and refrigerate for several hours or overnight.
Let set before baking about 30 minutes.
Bake, uncovered, at 350* for 55-60 minutes or until a knife inserted near the center comes out clean.

I also took a quart of strawberries.

NOTE: She and I lunched recently and said HOW grateful they were to have this.

They had plenty of food, but not breakfast food. They cooked this the morning of the funeral, so they would have something substantial to get them thru a noon funeral.

It's a make ahead and cook later. Freezes well.

This was a little different occasion, but when we were moving into this house, a neighbor brought over a "bucket of chicken." That was so wonderful! I put it out for those helping us move, and they woofed it down!

I think chicken would be good for this occasion also because if it is not eaten right away, it keeps for later.

I conssider Mac and Cheese a meal. It is a nice lite meal and if there are kids around it would be sure to please them too.

You don't mention when the funeral is. That would make a difference in what to take.

I think something more like the fruit tray, veggie dish, finger foods, or a cake, pie, or anything that doesn't require cooking or freezing would be best.

Then it is ready at any time.

When my DH died, I could not eat anything for a while. Snack food for those coming to visit was very helpful.

Sue

Great ideas above. If it were me, I'd take over a basket with an assortment of coffee,teas, cookies and baked goods. Things they can pick at as they wish or save for later.

Something that can be frozen. I though we would NEVER finish all of the ham when my grandfather died! He died in late September and I am not sure that side of the family was very excited to see ham even at Thanksgiving, lol.

The disposable dishes and especially cups would be great. And maybe tuck a permanent marker in for the cups- we were always mixing them up and there are some family members I do NOT want to drink after, lol.

I think it all depends on how much food is going to be coming to the house. I wouldn't want to take anything that would take up too much fridge room. A bucket of chicken is nice, cups,and a can of coffee, along with breakfast pastries, or if you know there are children in the house ordering and delivering (or having it delivered) a pizza is a great idea.

What dotmom said, plus some kind of breakfast food--maybe the egg casserole, or donuts, plus some fruit juice. Seems like everybody brings hams or fried chicken or casseroles--breakfast stuff is just great!

As my friend said, they had plenty of food, but not breakfast.

There were 4 of them at the house, before the funeral, so the Farmer's Casserole was just right, plus the strawberries.

When my FIL died, our next door neighbor brought us a huge pan of baked ziti with meat sauce and cheese. It was a godsend. We were running here and there, not home at regular times for regular meals, didn't feel like cooking anyway. It was wonderful to have something like that (that's pretty much a meal in itself) in the fridge. We'd just plop a bit on a plate, zap it and eat.

I'd recommend something along those lines. Baked ziti is easier to throw together than a lasagna, I think. And will be such a help in the coming days when a fuss-free meal may be all they want to cope with.

Oddly, when my mom died 2 years ago, we had different neighbors in the house next door, and THEY brought us a pan of baked ziti. It was an incredible (and appreciated) coincidence--guess it's becoming standard bereavement food.

I often make a large meatloaf. If they don't feel like eating a meal, it makes for great sandwiches. Also bring a bundt cake (generally a pound cake,) because that goes a long way, too.

I always make a lunch meat and cheese tray, accompanied by different sandwich breads and a pasta salad. Also, some type of dessert.

I think something that doesn't take up much refrigerator room or that doesn't have to be refrigerated. I know when my brother in law died my sister was having to find coolers to put things in out on the porch.

Sue

I just made a Texas Sheet Cake to take to the neighbor across the street.Her DH passed away Tuesday.It's a big family and we have seen huge amounts of food going in over there so I decided a dessert would probably work.There are a lot of kids.I think mac and cheese would be great.We can make a meal on that.LOL I agree with Marilyn though.Sometimes it's hard to find a place in the refrigerator so something that doesn't require refrigeration might be a good thing.

When my father in law died, a friend of mine brought a roast, with tators and veggies. It was the BEST of all the meals/food brought in.

Now, when ever I need to take something I take a roast and veggies and tators.

Put it in a toss away alu container, cause it is hard to get dishes back to the people that bring food.

Moni

PS, she also brought a cooler and a bag of ice. What a friend....

I think anything will be appreciated, although the people may be in a fog, they may not even remember what they've eaten. Your food should be a help and not create more chores for them. The disposable pans/plates is a great idea. Don't send something that will take up too much space in the fridge in case lots of people send/bring food.

I've always heard there is a ton of food in the beginning, maybe you could send a small meal, or a larger one portioned out, a few weeks from now when the widow is adjusting to being alone for meals now?

But if you want to do something now, mac & cheese is good since it can be eaten alone, or with other foods.

You're sweet to think of her in this tough time!

Our family really appreciated good paper plates, ground coffee and ice cream.....and paper towels.

Thanks for all your suggestions. I ended up taking a platter of deviled eggs and a coffee cake. All her family members showed up and there was lots of pasta, chicken, cakes, a large calzone and other good food. I think her sister might have done some coordinating with family members during the day. The eggs were gone very quickly.