Liz, Start by getting rid of EVERYTHING that doesn't fit, without any exceptions that it might fit "some day". Make it your goal to know that you can pull out any item of clothing and not have to put it back because it's the wrong size. I am familiar with that "finding a good home" idea and I kept things way longer than I should have because of it. Send your clothes to the thrift store and just picture in your mind someone finding your outfit and exclaiming, "This is PERFECT!". About 2 years ago I discovered the joy of thrift store shopping. LOL It takes time to go through the racks, but I like the thrill of the hunt. Never again will I pay $100 for a wool blazer (bought a like-new one yesterday for $1.60) or $50 for a pair of my favorite jeans (bought 2 pairs yesterday for $2.40 each that looked brand new) etc. I ended up with a new blazer, 2 pairs of jeans, one wool sweater with tags from the Gap, 3 long sleeved tops nice enough to wear to work, a half-dozen scented Yankee votive candles, a brand new big heavy weight fleece blanket to take to my sons football games (for $1.40!), 7 paperback books, and a pair of mens snow pants, all for about $23. Now I find it MUCH easier to get rid of clothes that aren't "me" because now I know that someone out there will find them and be happy. All the clothes in my closet are the right size except one turtleneck I pulled out yesterday that is a size too big. It went directly in a bag to be given away later. Bud--funny story: We work in a conservative midwestern office where we often get those "trendy" dressing, young, transfers from California coming in. They call it "trendy" but we call it "inappropriate". LOL Julie

My Skids have plenty of clothes and they do bring a bag from biomom but in the last 2 years or so she has stopped phoning and saying there is somehting missing and my dh now has stopped being petty as well cause i tell him its there clothes...who cares what comes and goes! they wear it not us!. There are times where there is an event we go to when we watn them dressed nicely, we have back up that here at our house. They also have 'good' clean clothes at moms for good occasions that they also do not bring here. And i read a thread of not cleaning clothes or use of laundry machine? what load of crap is that!!! my sd had her period a few months ago and was embarassed to go to her dad so she came to me inteh bathroom and asked if i would clean her underwear. She was worried she ruined them cause of the stains. I had oxyclean..works wonders on those monthly bills for nature! she appreciated it and regardless to the fact that we are not always onthe same page me and her, i will not leave her feeling bad about underwear stains. She looked humiliated. and i felt it was my right as a woman to help her. I even helped a poor father in the pharmacy last week...lol..he looked lost and panicky inthe pad section. lol...he said his 12 year old daughter just started her period that morning, mom was at work what do i do!!! i can't reach her on the phone...i thought to myself..why the panic? i guess its a guy thing. Pointed him out several brands and sizes..he bought 3 of each! heheehhehe..

Y'all're so civilized. My ex's brother & sister-in-law were not civilized. Ron had left his wife (the devoted mother of his children) for a woman from work. who got pregnant faster than Princess Di. The first wife hadn't worked outside the home since her marriage at age 17, Ron being one of those guys who said, "No wife of mine is going to work". & they'd been married for about 12 years. So she had to start from scratch taking secretarial courses to qualify herself for a job. The last time I saw Ron was at his mother's Christmas party, just about 2 months after he moved out, so his wife or ex-wife had no income of her own; she was completely dependent on him for everything. The new wife, all of about 20 minutes pregnant, kept rubbing her tummy & moaning & rubbing her back. (Can you tell how well I liked her?) The kids were subdued, to say the least. When they came in to tell everyone goodnight, I was shocked at their nightclothes. They looked like street urchins. The girl's nightgown was about 10" too short, & it was so worn-out you could almost see through it, & the little boy's "pajamas" were long underwear, stained & ugly. Their mother would *never* have sent them out looking like that. I must have looked shocked, because their new stepmother said, "We can't keep them in good clothes. *She* sends them to us with nothing, & whatever we buy them never comes back to our house (duh, they'd been married less than 2 months, & they'd moved to Oklahoma!), & *we* (!) pay *her* enough money to buy clothes." That was probably 25 years ago, those kids undoubtedly have half-grown children of their own by now... but it was so tacky & so vicious that I still remember it. I'm proud of y'all for being gracious & reasonable & all those other good adjectives. Well done.

I find it distracting. I expect the author to have a certain amount of credibility and consistency, even if it is fiction. The number one rule of writing is to be aware of your audience. Getting some details wrong shows a lack of awareness of your audience. The author should know the reader will be distracted by those sorts of errors, and that, as a narrator, some credibility will be lost. Also, the setting is a part of the story that should enhance the story. The author should choose it for a purpose in their overall creation. If accuracy of description doesn't matter, it's like saying an entire chuck of the story (setting) doesn't even matter. The author might as well say, "It doesn't matter where my story is set, pay no attention to that." In a good book, it should all come together, setting, plot, character, etc. But, the world will go on. I just won't be likely to ever pick up anything by that author again. The quality of a book I read probably matters a little more than it should to my life. It definitely matters more to me than to most people I know. ;o)