My goodness mamie he's just a newborn baby. There were no broken hearts in our family, we all visited my parents, all the time, in their retirement community, and the grandkids never asked for money. They adored my parents and my parents adored them (the other side of the family reaped what they sowed). The same thing happened to me and I was caught totally by surprise by the intensity of the feelings. I don't think it's jealousy as much as a protective response for this newest member of the family. I managed to keep it under control until it slowly dissipated. My DD's MIL was suddenly showing up with bags of gifts and lots of plans, even though her two granddaughters were living with her. It drove me nuts. But it was the novelty, and she quickly lost interest and rarely visits or calls or anything, now. I took two weeks off from work and helped out every day after my grandson (and subsequent granddaughter) was born, and went over for a day every weekend. I always made time to help or babysit, or whatever was needed, since they lived an hour away. My family always takes priority over my job. Newborn babies aren't very interesting, but once the little guy is 7 or 8 months old, he'll start noticing and interacting. I took my grandson for walks in the stroller, and wandered through a few nearby stores and then we fed cookies to the cows - he thought that was the funniest thing. You should be able to do the same with the weather warming up. Just playing on the floor with him is fun for him, too. Now that my DD, SIL and two grandkids live 2000 miles away, I fly down to see them every 2 months. My grandson, who's 4, knows that he has many grandparents and he loves them all, but he and his sister are so comfortable with me now, that I'm not worried. I'm happy to share them (though those twinges still come back sometimes!) If the other grandmother is interfering with your visits, then your DD and her SO will have to talk to her, nicely of course and work out times that are just for you. Enjoy, this is the most fun you'll ever have.

I would resist,but that is because I was molested by a male baby-sitter as a child. It really messed me up for alot of years too. Really though,it depends on maturity. Sounds like your son is responsible and quite mature for being 13. My step daughter that is 13 still fights over toys with my 9 year old and acts like she's 5...let alone does any classes or exprience at the zoo.So,he could probably handle it. Maybe you could have him only watch slightly older children,since toddlers and infants can be trying to someone with no child exprience. I agree shielajoyce,have him try it out with people you know with kids. But dont be surprized if you dont get alot of responses from strangers though. I also feel like adellabedella in the aspect I wouldnt hire a teen~be it boy or girl. They arent as child cautious as an adult would be,and wouldnt react well in a emergency as an adult would.(I had a 15 year old girl stay with my daughter for only an hour one night,come to find out she spent the whole time on the phone and ignored my daughter) Sounds like you have a great son though~with alot of ambition! Maybe if it doesnt work out you can help him think of other ways to make some extra money...like,mowing lawns or something.

Well, how did the evening go? Pink, I would take Deborah's advice, she is wise... -BUT- I would also set boundaries. Snooping-no way! You don't want her driving your child? - don't let her! You are the Mom control the situation. I would have been thrilled if my MIL had sent pictures of my child to friends and family. She was good to my child while she was growing up but there was always tension between me and her- I was always the outsider or outlaw(and the closest neighbor). I sucked it up and carried on, never called her on anything. She was never overtly mean to me but made little comments and made many demands around the holidays. My DH was always aware of it but never took a stand even when I ranted and raved over her. Ten years ago my husbands father died and there was a huge rift in the family, we didn't see or speak to MIL for over 8 years even though she was 1/2 miles down the road. I was shocked last Christmas when I saw her comming thru the yard on her walker! DH's brother had brought her to have Christmas dinner with us. She had had a stroke, and was much older looking than when I last saw her, but I greeted her with a kiss. Then I went out on the deck for a smoke and a drink! I stayed on the side lines and kept my mouth shut, just let DH and DD visit with her, it was strained, but at least they got to "visit" for a while, and all went well. It felt so good! I think she must have seen what shes been missing - family! She came back for Easter too. I am the one that cooks for the holidays now and the house is always full of her kids, gkids and ggkids and I like having her here too. I try to dwell on the good times, DH and DD are still wary (they were very hurt)but they are comming around. She taught me alot, about being the wife of a farmer, raising kids and how not to be a mother in law. I hope I can be a good future mother in law. Things change, be open to it.

They have been more of a parent to me than my own parents ever were, which is why I am resistant to cut ties. My husband has been trying to tell them to at least move into the new trailer, using the logic that it is considerably larger and therefore won't be junked up the way the current trailer is. I've sensed that he has given up on trying to get them to move (the new trailer is just a few yards away). I can tell he wants the best for them, but their resistance to change is taking a toll on him. His mom is in her 60s and his dad in his 70s. A couple of years ago, he voiced his worry about them being too old or sickly one day and having to live in a house where junk touches the ceiling in places. He also said once that it would be useless to talk them into moving into a larger home, when it would just become as crowded and filthy as the one they are in now. When I told him about the roaches (my first visit over there since becoming pregnant), I added that for health reasons, I am not going to risk it by going over there anymore while pregnant and brought up them not being allowed to babysit. All he said was "I know" and left it at that. Whenever he gets quiet about something, it's a sign he is giving up. This is my first pregnancy (has not been a smooth road health wise). I'm stressed enough as it is about other things and steadily tell myself to quit worrying about this particular situation. I have spoke with friends and family members. Their advice ranged from making an anonymous report about the condition of the house to avoiding them to not knowing what to say.