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mommabird_gw

15 year old son - friend died, now he sees no point in life

12 years ago

My son is 15. This week a terrible tragedy happened in our community, where 3 kids were at a home alone, with no adults, during the day. One of the them got out his grandfather's gun. Thinking it was unloaded, he pointed it at another kid and said "bang" and pulled the trigger. The gun was loaded, and the kid is dead. The third kid had this happen right in front of her.

My son is friends will all three of these other kids. He is so angry that loaded gun was left unlocked. He's a Boy Scout, so he has shot guns and earned two gun related merit badges. He knows to treat all guns as loaded guns. He's angry that other people don't teach their kids how guns work, that they don't leave their guns in a gun safe, that his friends who were smart, good kids did this thoughtless act.

I took him to the candle light vigil last weekend, and we're attending the memorial service tomorrow night. He says he's not as upset about the boy who died because he's in Paradise. He's upset about the boy who has to live his whole life knowing he killed his best friend (he has not been charged with any crime) and he's upset the other kid has to live with what she saw happen. He's upset for all the families involved.

All the kids in the community are just in shock right now. 100s attended the candle light vigil. He and he friends want to reach out to the by who accidently shot the gun, but that boy has retreated from the world, deactivated his Facebook, won't come out in public, won't answer texts or calls.

I wish there was more I could do for my son and his friends. I tell him I'm here to listen and do listen when he wants to talk. Today he told me he doesn't see any point in living in a world where you could be dead any day. That scared me because it seems like a vague suicide threat.

He already sees a therapist for issues relating to mine and his dad's divorce. The therapist only gives appointments twice a month, for an hour each. I've tried to call around to other therapists but they all seem so booked up in my area - none have any better availability.

Other than continuing therapy and being there to listen, what else can I do? Do any of you have ideas?

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