"what do i tell him? " In this reply, I'm assuming he's competent. Thinking may be better time for discussion and listening rather than "telling". He will likely have his his own opinions about these matters. Especially since he's already had considerable experience with chemo, I suspect his opinions may have been sharpened more than a little. Some people are willing to fight through anything for even a small chance at improvement or recovery. Some aren't. IMHO, either opinion deserves respect. His not wanting to die and not wanting to leave you are, doubtless, troubling thoughts for him. Discussion with you may help him settle his thinking about both. He may not come to a point of any particular confidence, but he may well come to a point of peace with whatever decision he makes. And your support of that decision will add to his comfort in making it. Terrible time for you both. Sorry for your trouble.

It is based on basic principles...back to the "wild days" on reading body language and displaying non verbal communication (ie. whispering). It is not a new concept, it has just been given a new name. I have been training dogs since I was a teenager and can easily get them (and the horses) to react accordingly with a glance or a motion...or as simple as my own demeanor.

Yes - I take it. I am Cdn. - I take one 100 mg Prometrium pill a day, plus one pump of Estrogel (the instructions on the pamphlet read 2 pumps but my doctor said just one). I have been on it for nearly 3 years - I didn't hit meno until age 57. There were no health considerations that would have affected my decision to take HRT - and in fact I take it because I was born with extremely dry skin so at 60 it sure hasn't gotten any better and the HRT really helps with this. I am just happy that I am able to take it - I am allergic to so many meds that HRT is all I take. I have very high body acid and do not sweat - the words "hot flash" do not apply - and I do not sweat - not even with the heat we had this summer. I can tell you though that the ability to take an anti-histamine, decongestant, sleeping aid - anything - would be preferable to me. I am one of those that wakes up in the operating room - and also locals wear off in 5 minutes. Procedures themselves do not scare me - it is the waking up part that does - or no freezing. So I will continue with my HRT until I am told otherwise.

Wow, this thread took wings again! Let's see if I can answer. missymoo - we wonder, too, about the discomfort of being still. But as I said upthread, she stops the pacing when we're not paying attention to her. She was never a particularly active dog, so other than maybe being bored, I'm not sure it's discomfort. Yesterday DH was gone and I was puttering around the house. She landed in one of her favorite spots and was there the entire afternoon. tibbrix - We live in NC, so the water is really cold right now. I just don't think I could do that. I wouldn't want someone tossing me in a cold lake in February. And she hates water unless DH is in there with her. I don't think he'll go for that. :) mimi - the vet has done a bunch of range of motion and that type of testing. There haven't been any tests with machines or anything. She doesn't think the dementia is really an issue because of the dog's attentiveness, being in-the-moment when she's there, etc. She said there is still a lot going on upstairs, and there are no other symptoms of dementia. We have her on pain management drugs, which are limited because she is also on Prednisone, which means she can't take NSAIDS. She's also on a supplement and fish oil for arthritis. I will look into the PAWS, that might help some. starsplitter - we have not used glucosamine/chondroitin for this dog, although we gave to another dog years ago. I'd have to ask and research it, it might not work with the Prednisone. The Pred is for a chronic liver ailment, and is keeping that well controlled. She only get 5mg every other day, so super low dosage, but long term. Thanks to everyone for all of the suggestions and words of advice. We've never had a dog live this long, so we're in new territory.