I'm ADD which is supposed to be a "mild" form of autism and, I guess aspberger. I wasn't diagnosed until I was in my late 30's and then only because a friend of mine was complaining about her husband's behavior and she was describing me to a "T". Typical of someone who is ADD, I hyper-focused on researching it and by god, I'm classically ADD. For me, finally knowing why I didn't think like everyone else or behave like everyone else or find it necessary to be like everyone else was, I can't describe it, it lifted a huge weight off my shoulders. Opened my eyes. Most people with ADD have IQ's off the charts like autism etc., but we still crave typical social situations, so we "dumb" ourselves down with drugs (both legal and not) and alcohol (age doesn't matter), and try to focus with caffeine and tobacco (we are always trying to go up or down depending on the situation and how we feel). Structure is really important to keep us focused but it thwarts the creative side and we hate that. We are either off or on, there is no middle ground. Drugs like Xanax and Ritalin help greatly but only a psychiatrist "gets"it. Other doctors think we are addicts waiting to happen. Truth be known, by the very nature of our "disease" we can't remember to take our meds often enough to become addicted. I'll head to the kitchen to get my bottle of Ritalin or Xanax and decide along the way I need to go the bathroom and forget all about it, until 2 days later. In my case, once I knew what I had and why it made me feel different or act differently, or want to act differently from the rest of the world, I was able to learn to use it to my advantage. Truth be known, I learned these coping skills as a child, just didn't know I was coping. There are times, weeks even, where I can't keep a thought straight in my head, I know to just chill out and play dumb. Yes, Ritalin will help but I need to take such large quantities I can't sleep and then I take too much Xanax and can't think. Yes, vicious cycle. I don't like it, so I just allow myself to be a total airhead since, frankly, nothing helps anyway. I've learned when drugs will help (most of the time actually) and when they won't. There are times I wouldn't trade being ADD for anything in the world. When I was diagnosed with breast cancer, I gave myself the equivalent of a couple years of med school in one month. Only someone with ADD could pull that off (we've all heard of the kids who finished med school at 21). Unless I'm having a "duh" period, I defy anyone to get the better of me, unless I decide the fight isn't worth it (hey, I'm lazy too). What I'm getting at is find your kids strengths and weaknesses and do your best to give him what he needs to succeed by focusing on his strengths. There are strengths there, you just have to learn to see the forest for the trees. Teach him to compensate for his weaknesses, or as Stacy and I did, let him figure them out for himself. Remember, your kid's true problem is he is smarter than 90% of the rest of the world. You have to figure out how to make him feel as though he fits in. I will say, though, based on my parents mistakes with me, don't make him do anything he isn't interested in other than forcing social skills on him. We shut off and tune out so fast you won't know what happened. Never give ultimatums. We don't care. Suggest alternatives. If he is drawing on his bedroom walls, don't threaten to beat him, let him draw on the driveway instead. That will be the end of it. Beat his butt and send him to bed and the next thing he will do is draw on the house with a can of spray paint. Remember, his peers already think he's "weird", you can't top that. Okay, I hope this makes sense. Good luck. Basically, just use your gut instincts with the kid and forget what the experts tell you. He's an individual like no other in the true sense of the term, learn to make the most of it. Laura

"what do i tell him? " In this reply, I'm assuming he's competent. Thinking may be better time for discussion and listening rather than "telling". He will likely have his his own opinions about these matters. Especially since he's already had considerable experience with chemo, I suspect his opinions may have been sharpened more than a little. Some people are willing to fight through anything for even a small chance at improvement or recovery. Some aren't. IMHO, either opinion deserves respect. His not wanting to die and not wanting to leave you are, doubtless, troubling thoughts for him. Discussion with you may help him settle his thinking about both. He may not come to a point of any particular confidence, but he may well come to a point of peace with whatever decision he makes. And your support of that decision will add to his comfort in making it. Terrible time for you both. Sorry for your trouble.

Posted by deedee-2008 I have not heard of any scientifically proven studies linking it vaccines, except for the old "swine flu" vaccine in the 1970s. This is what I'd researched 11/22/08. I don't know what's been documented and what has not. After doing research on the vaccine, I decided my daughter can make her own decision about the vaccine when she turns 18. I know there are a lot of mothers that are upset they trusted their Dr's with the vaccine & their children are either dead or in bad shape. I don't mean to throw the post off topic; but want to add what I'd researched back in 2008. - I'm going to directly copy a post I made elsewhere. Some reading for those interested- Gardasil on Wiki - scroll down, to where it says Safety - it mentions Guillain-Barr Syndrome - an acute inflammatory demyelinating polyneuropathy (AIDP), an autoimmune disease affecting the peripheral nervous system, usually triggered by an acute infectious process. article - Serious Questions About HPV Vaccine - July 7, 2008 CDC Gardasil reports - on the left, it says HPV Related Quick Links Guillain-Barré Syndrome Fact Sheet

Yes - I take it. I am Cdn. - I take one 100 mg Prometrium pill a day, plus one pump of Estrogel (the instructions on the pamphlet read 2 pumps but my doctor said just one). I have been on it for nearly 3 years - I didn't hit meno until age 57. There were no health considerations that would have affected my decision to take HRT - and in fact I take it because I was born with extremely dry skin so at 60 it sure hasn't gotten any better and the HRT really helps with this. I am just happy that I am able to take it - I am allergic to so many meds that HRT is all I take. I have very high body acid and do not sweat - the words "hot flash" do not apply - and I do not sweat - not even with the heat we had this summer. I can tell you though that the ability to take an anti-histamine, decongestant, sleeping aid - anything - would be preferable to me. I am one of those that wakes up in the operating room - and also locals wear off in 5 minutes. Procedures themselves do not scare me - it is the waking up part that does - or no freezing. So I will continue with my HRT until I am told otherwise.