Hi, I am 46 in January and have been going through perimenopause since I was about 40. Started with sore swollen breasts, then heavier periods and even heavier then I had PMS for the first time in my life (It took 2 years before I realised it was PMS due to the cycles and timings of my symptoms) then I had insomnia around my PMS time and as the years have moved on my periods are all over the place. Then night sweats, nothing major just one a night and certainly no drenching of the bedding but enough to wake me up. I have periods with no symptoms and symptoms with no periods. The hardest part is no longer being able to say "Ahh! I feel like this because I am due on" the symptoms just hit me at any time and there is no rhyme or reason to them anymore. I have been waking up every night at 5am for months and thankfully I go back to sleep within 20 to 30 minutes sometimes less. Sometimes I get insomnia when and anxiety about insomnia when I wake up and cant go back after 4 hours etc but that usually is followed by my period which is now no more than a tiny spot of old blood, if that. I am using Progesterone (Natural) pessaries 400mg daily every day no break and have done for two years. Progesterone is the calming hormone, nick named "Natures Valium" were as oestrogen is an excitatory hormone. Over the years, as we age, progesterone starts to drop, when we fail to ovulate our bodied produce no progesterone at all (Except a small amount from the brain) and this is what causes a worsening of PMS symptoms as we reach menopause. Oestrogen levels on the other hand, remains the same (over time, of course it dips and ducks throughout the month) and with xenoestrogens in the environment and in our foods, cosmetics, microwave foods contained in plastic, meats etc that women are now no longer accepting the old fashioned belief that we need "Oestrogen" when facing peri and menopause, in fact quite the opposite! Oestrogen Dominance is no more a gimmicky term used to sell progesterone products than "Oestrogen Deficiency" is to the pharmaceutical companies who sell chemical hormones to the medical profession who prescribe them. The studies done on menopause were last researched in the 1950s and were incomplete and yet the medical profession are still treating hormone issues based on that out of date information. If you research the net you will discover *new* studies showing post menopausal women in their 50s with as much Oestrogen as a 20 year old woman but almost no Progesterone. The modern era has enough xenoestrogens to push our Oestrogen levels up already without us needing to put more into our system. It's not a case of a lack of Oestrogen, its the balance or lack there of, of these two hormones that cause the issues.. and as I say, modern research shows a decline in Progesterone whilst Oestrogen remains more or less the same. Women who have PND do so due to the sudden drop of progesterone once they give birth. Our bodies make 400mg of progesterone when we are pregnant. We give birth and suffer from depression anxiety etc due to the sudden drop in Progesterone. This is why many women say that their PMS goes when they were pregnant but comes back with a vengeance when they give birth. All that said, and despite my Progesterone therapy (Which I had to convince my female doctor to prescribe as she wanted me to have a coil fitted) I DO have bad weeks and hours and not all of the symptoms have gone and I wonder if I am getting worse the closer to menopause I get. According to my research you cannot overdose on progesterone, the only thing that would happen is you would feel sleepy! Take too much Oestrogen and all Hell breaks loose not to mention the links to cancers. If anyone is interested in the research and papers to back my own belief up here is a link to a forum on the subject http://www.progesteronetherapy.com/#axzz3KNpFIkMz I am very interested in womens experiences who HAVE taken HRT in either combination, for how long and whether they feel it was working :) Many thanks, Here is a link that might be useful: Progesterone Therapy

Weight gain during menopause is one of womens greatest fears. Women fear menopause makes it harder for them to keep weight off. The fact is, it's hard to tell exactly what the cause is for the weight gain. Women need fewer calories because generally, women become less active as they get older. But be careful when you cut back calories because you can actually slow your metabolic rate, which means you burn less fat and actually sabotage your weight-loss efforts. You'll also notice you store the extra weight in different areas. Hips, lower abs, and bottom store more due to gravity. Do you attribute weight gain to water retention? If it's fluid retention, you will probably notice that your ankles are swollen and your hands are puffy. It can also be related to excessive salt intake or a heart, kidney, or liver condition. If you have heat or cold sensitivity, suffer chronic fatigue, or experience difficulty concentrating, these are symptoms your thyroid could be out of balance. You can also work to control your blood sugar which will help you control your weight gain. In weight loss and weight control, your first goal should be to keep insulin levels from getting too high since insulin clearly promotes fat storage. hope this helps, Bob Here is a link that might be useful: menopause weight gain

Hello Fay-Lisa, You've been through so much, you should get a medal for staying as strong as you have and being able to maintain your job and relationship. You are absolutely NOT insane or anything close to it. Many people have that moment in life (or several) in which they feel like they have *had* it. They may not use markers to vent their frustration/anger/anxiety/depression but they do all kinds of other things -- eat too much, drink too much, have affairs, spend too much, leave their families, withdraw completely and so on. First things first, you are doing the right thing by getting all the physical tests out of the way. My first thought after reading everything you've been through is that you might need to see an endocrinologist to have your thyroid and hormone levels thoroughly checked (forgive me if you said you have already done then). If all the tests turn out to be in the normal range, then it's time to consider other possibilities. You may have some kind of chemical imbalance which might be helped with the right kind of medication. This process is most definitely trial and error, and I certainly understand your frustration with the various medications and their respective side effects. I don't like taking them either, but they do have their place as part of an overall approach to tackling and managing symptoms. One suggestion I have is for you to find a *good* therapist -- someone who is very experienced and has training in working with people who may have emotional damage from childhood. You mentioned in your post some unkind things your mother said to you when you were young. I imagine there's a lot more where that came from. Was there alcoholism in your family of origin? Are there others in the family or extended family who have struggled with mental health issues? One psychiatrist I consulted with asked me what kinds of mental health issues there were in my family (I, too, was struggling with terrible depression and panic attacks/anxiety). When I told him there were family members with bi-polar, extreme anxiety, schizophrenia, alcoholism and chronic depression, he said, "well, what did you expect?" The truth is most families have members who cope with these illnesses. A psychologist said that each of us has a collection of genes that contribute to our personalities and temperaments. We just have to work on doing the best with what we've got. You sound like a very self aware, strong person. Please please please do not be so hard on yourself. I am an easy going, peaceful person usually-- but when I have gone through difficult times in my life the anxiety and depression caused me to behave in ways I'm not proud of -- angry, irritated, crying, throwing things, hiding, having major panic attacks where I felt outside of my own body. That's called disassociation and it can happen when anxiety and depression go on for too long without proper treatment. In addition to all this, there is the real possibility that you are now in perimenopause and many of your current symptoms may have been caused or made worse by it. I think I've had every symptom in the "34 symptoms of menopause" list." I've always dealt with anxiety and depression, but this was so deep and dark -- I'm thankful to God that I finally found a competent therapist, the right medication and inner strength to choose to believe in myself and stop condemning myself. This is a choice you can make too and I hope you will. It sounds like you're a caring, compassion, intelligent and very sensitive person. Those are gifts worth celebrating!! It's so easy to slip into that groove of basing your self worth on your job. I'm a decade older than you, and I'm here to tell you, the quality, richness and success of your life is not about what you do to earn money to support yourself. It's about your relationships and your experiences. What do you do to relax and have fun? Fulfilling life experiences don't have to cost a lot of money. You don't have to have a lot of friends, but you do need a support system you can turn to for a listening ear and encouragement. There are many ways you can cultivate loyal, kind and supportive friends. You deserve to have people in your life in addition to your wonderful boyfriend who care about you and will treat you like the amazing person you are. Life goes by so quickly. Take each day as it comes and don't worry so much about the future. As the saying goes, we only live 24 hours at a time. And if I'm having a really bad spell, I take it about an hour at a time : ) Be good to yourself. You might find yoga relaxing or some other kind of exercise class. You might also find a support group beneficial -- it's always comforting to know you're in good company when it comes to dealing with life's difficulties. Think about what makes you the happiest and resolve to pursue these things. Don't ever let anyone make you feel "less than" about anything -- whether it's your job, appearance, hobbies, friends -- all these belong to *you* and if someone doesn't have something supportive or helpful to say to you, tune it out!!! It took me years to learn how to do this, but I am happy to say, it can be done!! Keep posting and let us know how you're doing. I am interested in finding out what the test results will show. But no matter what, cherish yourself and look for the positive things that happen each day -- even the smallest good things matter. God bless you and good luck with your appointments next week!!

Yes. I'm 50. Early last month after a year and a half of no periods, I get a period. Of course my mind went to the worst place. I made a doctor's appt since I was due for an exam anyway. He ordered an ultrasound and that came back normal as well as the Pap smear. He said it's possible to have a "last hurrah." My hot flashes ended during that time and I started sleeping well again. Unfortunately that didn't last long. Other things can cause bleeding so it's a good idea to get checked out. Hope all is well.