Hello again,
yes I realize that if my wife was filling a void by seeing an escort, male or female, it would hurt me as her husband. However, after all I have tried over the years I would feel that would be just to hurt me. Before anyone says that is what I am doing to her, I know.
Tenderchichi, I don't mean to be ignorant but I don't know what a "OP" is or what a "DW" is, but really do you talk like that too? you really need to tone it down a notch considering you don't know who your audience is here.
Yes I would like to know more about Robin Suzique.

tenderchichi,

You may be on to something... the fact that he has an ongoing pattern of cheating (and it's not a one time thing) points almost directly to a deep seeded insecurity.

Deep insecurity is usually linked to/causes a Narcissist personality disorder. And, what really suggests the narcissism to me, is that he really doesn't seem to think what he is doing is wrong.

So you have a very insecure man, who cheats, and doesn't think it's wrong. It really doesn't sound like a difference in opinion about the marriage contract, or have anything to do with the fact that guys think different than girls (which he tried to convince us of). And, as accepting or open you may be about different types of marriage arrangements, this is not an open marraige. He is lying to and cheating on his wife. His opinion that this is ok within his marriage, is just irrational.

A good example of this that may help explain it better is Rod Blagojevich... not only was he doing wrong (which we can easily see and believe), but he really, really doesn't see it as wrong (and continues to somehow excuse himself). And, it's not some ploy; he really appears to believe he is innocent. He's a big time Narcissists. That's how they think. He's not rational.

I don't know if this poster (OP) is really a narcissist or is just really insecure and trying to convince himself it is ok. I hope for his sake, that he really "knows" deep down what he is doing is wrong. If not, he's...well... it's not good. He could probably benefit from some counseling either way... but as I would guess you know, narcissists are probably the last group to agree to or be able to be helped by counseling (They've done nothing wrong, of course, so don't need help).

Hey Carla,
who got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning?
First of all, if youre a psychologist then I would accept your diagnosis of "deep seeded insecurity" but chances are youre not. This makes it your opinion. "Narcissist personality" would mean that in your opinion I believe that I superior to others and have little regard for other people's feelings. to me this type of person would be like this all the time.
Second I never said there is nothing wrong with what I have done, I have rationalized it to be an activity that I have chosen to participate in to experience other women without emotional "baggage", and relieve sexual tensions.
I keep this secret to all I know because I do realize that may have bad judgment, but also as to not hurt the ones that love me and I care about.
Youre not going to be convinced of anything, and I don't really care if you are or not. It's a free country and you or I cannot change the facts. There will always be women and men out there that will sell themselves for sexual favors, and there will always be sexually deprived individuals who will pay the price. There will also be people like you who insist on imposing their will upon others and trying to suppress human behavior like this. Personally, I am of the point of view that if it is accepted and regulated, not advertised openly then society could benefit from it.

>> "...the ones that love me and I care about".

Now I really am laughing out loud. In other words: "People love me; I care about them".

Sorry, I submitted too soon. Chazlie, I wish you well in your relationships, and especially feel for your wife. What you are doing and expressing in words is not something that is acceptible behavior or attitude in my opinion, but it apparently works for you personally, and I think you're doing your best, unfortunately. I would imagine that it wouldn't work for your wife if she knew. Therefore, I feel that it's unfair to her and you're lying, cheating, and invalidating your promises to her. But heck - it works for you.

You can because you can; you said that. You have a great way of blaming your wife and justifying, but I suspect that, even if you were good in bed and able to satisfy your wife, you'd still frequent hookers. From all you've said, trying to no avail to make yourself look like the poor, denied man, I think you'd look for any/every opportunity to experience other women, despite any situation at home. You've been pretty clear about that.

It's not my business, you're not in my life (thank God), and you will just go forward with the attitude that this is Ok and you deserve it. I'd venture to say that your wife deserves more than she's getting, too, but whatever. Good luck to you.

"There will also be people like you who insist on imposing their will upon others and trying to suppress human behavior like this"

Ok, Rod, you're right, you're not doing anything wrong and who am I to try to suppress this type of human behavior?

It's not your cheating behavior that I'm worried about. Many men cheat. It's your rationalization and excuses behind it that seem odd. But, I'm certain you don't see it; that's the problem...

I see it,
I don't think I am imposing my will upon you or anyone else. I am not making excuses for what I am doing, I know I am doing for pure self gratification, I know that. I could be doing more hurtful things like haveing an affair with emotions involved. This could be with a man or women. I believe that having an affair with all the emotional events that goes with that is worse than seeing an escorts. I also realize that you folks don't see the difference.
Please don't compare me to "Rod" he's just a A**ho**.
What about Bill Clinton, what about all the other guys out there who have no other way?
if your partner is asking you to do a couple of things outside your sexual or emotional comfort zones and being refused, why is everyone surprised when they go outside the relationship to get it?

As opposed to taking "No" for an answer?
Oh, the horrors!

And for what it's worth, if I thought my Hubby was seeing escorts, or wasn't pleased with our intimate relations, I wouldn't exactly be thrilled about sleeping with him.
You say your wife's lousy in bed?
That's probably WHY she's lousy in bed!

A woman doesn't feel sexy unless her man seems to find her sexy;
and a woman who doesn't feel sexy doesn't act sexy.
And the last thing a woman wants to do when she's not feeling sexy is something that crosses her personal comfort line.

The OP is attempting to make the point that going to escorts causes the least amount of harm to the most people. In that, if he were to divorce and find a suitable mate or just continue seeing escorts without marriage, that it would do more harm. Divorcing his wife or apprising her of the situation would do more damage because no one is the wiser if he does not tell. As a result, the OP must live a lie. Up to this point it has been working out.

It does not seem like an authentic way to live. How do you appear to yourself to be happily married? It is an oxymoron.

The OP uses Bill Clinton and "all the other guys out there" who have done the same thing. Consider, that "they" were caught. That they suffered the consequences of their actions. And, we do not know how their wives, families, close friends reacted to the deception.

It seems a lot harder to maintain this lifestyle than it would be to divorce and live an authentic life with or without the use of escorts.

On the other hand, if you were to say that the burden of separating your finances as a result of a divorce would create havoc in your life then, at least, that would make sense. But, remaining in the marriage as it is at the present time is unfair to your DW unless you disclose to her what you are doing.

You might want to consider the 'non divorce' as an option. Many couples who cannot strike a happy balance are entering into such a relationship. At the very least, it would offer you the opportunity to live an authentic life.

I would never consider it an option for myself, though.

It does not seem like a very healthy way to live as it defies the way marriage is defined in our culture.

Quote from article:

'Though the situation varies, a couple in a nondivorce usually remain living together under one roof, more like passionless roommates than spouses. There are no hard statistics, but some divorce experts say they're seeing more of this unromantic phenomenon, driven by three big financial factors: the high cost of legal fees in divorces, the expense of setting up two households and the difficulty in obtaining adequate health insurance, especially if one spouse has a pre-existing condition.'

Link to article:

Salutations,
first things first, I have tried for 15 years to make our sex life what it could be between my wife and myself. is that not enough trying, experimenting and getting turned down and refused every time. I try to make her feel sexy, wanted and needed in the bedroom, again rejected. Once or twice a month we do have relations but it is always my wife disconnecting, she does not tell me what feels good and what does not. It takes 2 ya know.

Tenderchihi, I'll ask again, what is an OP? and what is a DW?
Your kind of right however, I don't want a divorce - my parents were divorced and growing up in that environment was terrible. My Wife's parents are still together, but they apear to be unromantic with each other. I have never seen them kiss, hug or even hold hands. My wife and I have 2 kids that we love dearly.
Yes I am too cheap to give up the home we built together and I am certain that my wife could not support herself. I don't know what you mean by "a authentic life" but this is about the only way I have found to hold on to my sanity and enjoy being a family.
I am not looking to be analyzed by you nor am I looking for your approval. I think it is important for a person to express themselves sexually durring their life time.

"OP" translates to "Original poster"

"DW" is "Dear wife"

When posting, there should be an expectancy of contrasting opinions. Especially, considering that this board is confined to marriage and the post is controversial.

By authentic, I mean Honest with yourself. Not necessarily to your significant other, family and friends. There is a wide gap between who you are and what you are pretending to be. The persona does not match up with the reality of a happily married man.

It is a form of "Doublespeak" which helps a person to accept the unacceptable to avoid the consequences of having a conscience. Deceiving both the deliverer and the receiver of the ambiguity contained within one concept. Eventually, gnawing away at the individual's freedom to make choices about good, bad, right, wrong, moral or immoral. The person that practices this becomes amoral.

Who are you? What do you stand for? Even, if 'people' judged you badly, at least you are standing for something and not living a lie.

DW has a right to know, and decide to approve and stay or disapprove. The ball would then be in her court.

If you remain as you are it must be out of fear of the consquences for yourself and not about you not wanting to hurt others.

That is my take on it. It all seems very fake to me. Marriage does not allow for the use of escorts. It negates marriage unless both parties agree.

To read about the concept of "Doublespeak"

I understand the rules,
I understand the fourm, I disagree with your advice that my wife should know.
she is happy not knowing, and would be hurt if she did. I don't want to hurt her, but I don't what to hurt myself by stopping my behavior. So for now I am happy with living with the secret.

I really don't care if you agree or disagree. I am happy with the fact that we can agree to disagree. Since none of you can fathom the heart ache that brought me to this point but you are quick to judge, not understand. You too take the easy path as I have. it's human nature.

I will admit that I haven't read through every post on this thread. I just want to make a couple of comments.

I have told my husband that if he wants sex at night he needs to start working on it in the morning. A point not always taken.

I don't think the question is really should someone tell their spouse that they have cheated on them but rather what type of person could live with that on their conscience and not confess, ask for forgiveness and try to work out things in their marriage. Some marriages can survive, others shouldn't.

If you want to behave as a single person and sleep around, be single.

Men usually don't cheat for the sex alone, don't blow that smoke up my chimney. They cheat because they need to be feel appreciated or valued. I suggest they do something to be appreciated and valued for and see how that works for them. Breathing and belching and farting don't count.

Contrary to popular belief, most woman don't live for doing the laundry, dishes, cooking and acting like a whore in the bedroom. They have been given other gifts that they ENJOY using...if they had the time. A lot of men will do for their mistresses what they wouldn't do for their wives. Married men can be very attractive. No cooking, no laundry, no kids, no cleaning. Add all that to the mix and she'll look at you the same way your wife does....like another child.

What is lacking from a self indulgent sex life is emotional intimacy, for which there is no substitute.

"I have told my husband that if he wants sex at night he needs to start working on it in the morning. A point not always taken."

Priceless Believer!

Silver,

Thanks!! At least if I know he is working on it in the morning I can tell him "NO' a head of time and save him all the trouble he'd have to go through during the day!!! LOL

i think its funny how this thread has so strayed from its original topic and purpose. So bring it back, not to freak you out but i was on the america's most wanted website and i read this story about a man who got killed by the owner of a escort agency because he was paying the call girls directly!(http://www.amw.com/fugitives/case.cfm?id=54657) if your husand is getuing involved with this type stuff, suggest help cause thats dangerous!

I have read every post here, and I just want to commend Chazlie for what rings true as a male perspective.

I was raised with many older brothers, and watched and learned in amazement what lengths men will go to keep the truth about their sexual escapades away from their significant other, and what lengths they will go to to experience that pleasure.

At times it seemed superhuman effort (and no sleep) was involved in getting what they sexually needed/wanted.

I envy males for their ability to experience pleasure without attachment. I don't know how 'escorts' can give of their bodies night after night and not get emotionally attached.

Okay, so from these last two posts, you'd think that all women are destined to exist with men who cannot or do not control their sexual urges and that the only option in life is to learn to live with men who have no sexual boundaries or self control.

This is unfortunate. Sex is a human need, indeed - that doesn't justify infidelity. Sex, with a girlfriend, a prostitute, or office supplies is still sex outside the marital bond - and the secrecy is what creates the betrayal and the pain.

You can always request job changes. Beyond that, being on a business trip doesn't mean that an escort service is part of the package. It's not like, here sir, is your towel, your hand soap, your meal ticket, and your warm body. If it were that way, we wouldn't be having this discussion. Sounds like there is a lot of justification for his behavior, which will only lead to more of it.

You are right! Any sex outside of marriage for me in considered completely wrong and only serves selfish personal needs. I have always been very clear in our relationship that if this situation every came up I would be gone. I did leave for a few days and after some soul searching I needed to see if we can work things out.
I do not in any way agree with his decision. I am only in control of my actions.
I am tracking our bank accounts and credit bills more closely. We have set up an account with GPSed which tracks where his blackberry is (not fool proof because he can leave it where ever). I have located private eye services that can track and report his activity when away for work which I will do at some point in the future when he will be unaware. I will be travelling with him for a while.
We have a long way to go in terms of trust and I am not sure we ever will have that back. I have said several times that you do not have a marriage if you do not have trust.

It's been a while since I have posted here -
I would like to first thank xminion for not be ratting me or the my decisions to seek the company of beautiful sexy women, yes even if I pay them.
For the folks that agree with Believer that sex should be earned and not enjoyed your missing the entire point.
Like many things in life there are levels, steps that one goes through.
Seeing escorts is no different - the more you see the more you learn to enjoy yourself, seek out your sexual wants - experience what the body can do - and can't..
how many of you can honestly say you have an excellent sex life? How many of you can say that you have had the opportunity to spend more than 5 hours having fantastic sexual experiences that you will fondly remember?
my guess is not many, epically when sex is used as a weapon or a tool to get what they want, not just for the enjoyment of it.

"For the folks that agree with Believer that sex should be earned and not enjoyed your missing the entire point. "

Chazlie, that's not what Believer meant, IMO. And I don't see sex as something I want to share with someone I'm paying to pretend to like me. That is gross to me. I have a EXCELLENT sex life with my husband. It gets better and better as time goes on and we get to know one another better, what works, what doesn't, what's fun, what isn't. I would rather "...learn to enjoy (my)yourself, seek out (my)your sexual wants - experience what the body can do - and can't.. " with someone I love.

I have a very attractive, sexy husband, and I think I'm rather good looking and sexy as well. I'm sorry that you cannot attract a beautiful, sexy woman who is both interested in you and willing to be with you without payment. That sounds like a personal problem. If I were you I'd work on my social skills and personal hygiene to make myself more attractive to the many women who are good looking, sexual beings who would love to explore sexuality with the right man.

Xminion "...commend(s) Chazlie for what rings true as a male perspective.

News flash. All men are not the same, just as all women are not the same. MOST prostitutes are lesbians and do not like men. It's business. It's acting. It's not real, boys.

Wonderfully said, silversword. I agree. It is always interesting to me how men who engage hookers actually seem to believe that the hookers like them and enjoy sex with them.

And I, too, think that enjoying sex over a period of time with the man whom I love, trust, and loves and trusts me is the ultimate.

Suzieque

Isn't that the oddest thing? How so many men will believe that these women like them and find them sexy? Despite having to PAY them?

But then, just as many women seem to fall for the "You're so beautiful -- I've never met anyone like you." line, and give it up for free -- so I guess it's probably about the same.

Thanks Suzie. This thread just got on my last nerve. I think it's sad that these men are really so disconnected with their emotional sexuality that they would believe sex with a prostitute is the answer to learning about sex/getting sexual fulfillment.

To me, sex is a lot more than the actual physical act. Like Believer said (and this is what I think she meant...) if you want sex with me, you need to act like it all day long, not just jump into bed expecting some. This means building up to the intimacy all the time. No, not spreading flower petals from the front door to the chocolates on the pillow every day, but it's the little touches, eye contact, loving moments that warm a person up and make them want to get closer.

Yes, a prostitute will get into bed with you when you want, act really interested, compliment you on your size and brevity and do what you like. But that does not fill the cup. It's like empty calories. An hour later you will be hungry again. And I'd rather fill my plate with sustainence than fluff.

Sweeby, you're right, it's not very different. But, I think the difference is that women know they are not "the one" but are willing to hope and dream for that because of low self esteem. They pay for feeling wanted, desired, loved with their body. These men actually believe that the best sex to be had is with a play-toy girl rather than a real woman. And they are willing to pay for the deception in dollars.

Re: "To me, sex is a lot more than the actual physical act."

But this simply means that you are a woman and have no understanding of men whatsoever.
For men sex has nothing to do with love, it is a physical act, and they don't cheat as a way of doing something bad to you. I cheat on my wife on regular basis and I'm proud of being honest with myself and not cheating myself thinking that one partner is sufficient - no matter how sick this makes you. But at the same time I love my wife dearly and wouldn't want to lose her, but I would choose sexual freedom over marriage. Unfortunately as a woman she also has no understanding of men's nature and needs.
What many of you may be forgetting is that less and less people get married and more and more get divorced or cheat.
For example for me the main reason to get married was for convenience - have a soul to talk to, someone to cling to, and to raise a family. Later I've grown to love my wife, but without these benefits I rather wouldn't have strong motivation to get married. And I started to cheat after I realized that these benefits are just that - benefits, but I cannot cheat on myself by subduing my sexual nature and sheer curiosity.
The world cannot be perfect unless everyone can become a swinger, but of course 80% of women won't accept that. And because of not accepting this you will usually be cheated on and feel hurt. We're not in heaven, pain is part of life, so either get used to it or learn how to live with men and support what's natural for them.

Re: "I have told my husband that if he wants sex at night he needs to start working on it in the morning. A point not always taken."

Wow. There is nothing worse you can do than withold sex! This is not only a turn-off for a guy but it can cause an emotional disaster while providing 10x stronger emotional stimulus to cheat.

If your husband doesn't cheat then in 80% of cases he is either ugly, or sufferring, or you are swingers. 10% may be getting a lot of sex from you (good). The last 10% are just gullible loving hubbies.

And why am I even writing all this? Because you women never ask why men cheat. Go to a bar, find a man and ask, discuss, learn. Hey, talking to your own husband before you even know that he cheats may also not be a bad idea.

"Re: "To me, sex is a lot more than the actual physical act."

"But this simply means that you are a woman and have no understanding of men whatsoever. For men sex has nothing to do with love..."

How presumptuous of you. Do you honestly think you can speak for the whole male population? Where's Asolo when we need him??

"If your husband doesn't cheat then in 80% of cases he is either ugly"

Are you a statistician? Ugly guys get sex too. If they have enough money to pay for a drink and enough brains to listen to a drunk woman at the bar, they can get laid easily. Getting sex is not hard, and getting sex with women who are not paid for their services is not hard either.

"And why am I even writing all this? Because you women never ask why men cheat. "

Why would I ask you why men cheat? It's obvious you know very little about relationships and make broad assumptions about the lives of others based on your poor rationalizations.

"...for me the main reason to get married was for convenience - have a soul to talk to, someone to cling to, and to raise a family. Later I've grown to love my wife, but without these benefits I rather wouldn't have strong motivation to get married. And I started to cheat after I realized that these benefits are just that - benefits, but I cannot cheat on myself by subduing my sexual nature and sheer curiosity."

Here's what stands out for me:
1. Convenience
2. Someone to cling to
3. Subduing sexual nature and sheer curiosity
4. Having a soul to talk to

I didn't marry my husband for any of those reasons. I married him because I love him to the bottom of my soul and back. I am thrilled every night to climb into bed beside him. I don't need to subdue my sexual nature with strangers, I can do that with my husband. I don't want a soul to talk to, I can find people to talk to on every corner. I want to talk with him. And I don't want anyone to cling to me, nor to cling to them. That just sounds icky. I got past those types of relationships in high school.

"I love my wife dearly and wouldn't want to lose her, but I would choose sexual freedom over marriage. Unfortunately as a woman she also has no understanding of men's nature and needs."

And you have no understanding of women. To say you love her, but would choose sexual freedom over being with her, yet keep this a secret from her, exposing her to disease, not participating fully in your marriage... this is not love. If you had integrity you would leave her. To stay because you like the comfort is what disgusts me. Were you just out sowing your oats I'd have no problem. Most people are not mature enough to nurture a stable relationship.

"I'm proud of being honest with myself...lately I've grown to love her..."

I'd be interested to know what is your definition of "love". Does your wife know how proud you are of yourself for being honest with yourself? Does your wife know you only married her so you would have a clean nest to drag your dirty a** back to when you finished tomcatting around?

I know why men cheat. They aren't being sexually satisfied at home. And I know why women cheat. They aren't having their needs met at home either. Sexually, emotionally, mentally. I don't need to go to a bar to ask the drunk degenerates why they are cheating.

Swinging has no appeal to me. Do you know the statistics for STD's? One in five Americans have genital herpes (yet at least 80 percent of those with herpes are unaware they have it). Lovely. Yes, I'd like some casual herpes... oh... I mean sex, please. And don't tell me you use protection. That's a joke.

I'm sorry you married a woman to satisfy your nesting needs rather than a partner with whom you are compatible. Not everyone has that problem. Your attention span is so short you attributed Believer's comment to me. It's no wonder you can't satisfy your wife. It makes me laugh to consider the different sides were we to question some of your sexual conquests. I daresay they would have a different opinion of quality and quantity than you would.

Well said Silversword!

Wife_cheater - So you are proud of being honest with yourself and not cheating yourself in thinking that one woman is sufficient. Wow! at least you are honest with someone. What about the woman you entered into a marriage/partnership with and claim to love dearly, doesn't she have an equal right to the truth?? Let HER decide if she wants to stay with a cheater.

"Do you honestly think you can speak for the whole male population? Where's Asolo when we need him??"

Be calm, my lovely. And don't feed the trolls.

*s* I'm still learning *s*

Wow, that is lame that he would do that. I would get a divorce.

As long as nobody is feeding trolls, has anyone tried pheremones? LOL I actually have, and found them to be quite effective....

Aloha, My husband of 7 years has done the same thing. I know that he loves me and is not "cheating" He just seems to need something else. We have a great relationship and a great sex life. So, what is it? A sexual addiction? I think so. Any advice?

Find a new husband?

Is he ok with you getting "satisfaction" elsewhere?

I've given up on most of your hypocritical opinions here folks.
Wife_cheater - Bravo! nicely said.. but watch out the riotous silverword will rip you apart with the quotes and comments of the emotional.
Suzique, there are guys and gals that have been involved in this "hobby" for decades. They are smart enough to understand that it's all about the money, and sex but foremost the money. No money, no playtime.
however if one can get past the initial barriers of monogamy and trust, and open one's mind to being sexually free this can open more opportunities that these "working folks" can open up to one person.
you really don't get the idea that an escort can provide services that no one else can. Yes you need to pay them for their services. But with my personal experiences this lifestyle has opened a few doors for me to enjoy more than one woman, yes at a time and even some other mutual enjoyable activities that most of you would find discussing. Ladies, how many of you ever wondered what it would be like to have 2 or 3 guys within you at one time?
Getting wild in the bedroom is not for most, and definitely not for the frigid.
Personally, I know of more than a few ladies that are married and their husbands are aware and support their decisions to see other men for money, some only do it because they totally enjoy the sex during play time. Some do it for the money.
I've had the pleasure of getting to know both the wife and the husbands of these folks, and their open mindedness is enlighten to say the least.
They do it because, basically, everyone cheats, in some method or another. Whether it be looking at a guys bum walking down the street, or screwing the milk man to hiring a escort or two to provide services you know your wife wont do.

Chazlie,
I guess it all comes down to what you value. If "not" having a craving to have more than one man 'within' me makes me frigid, then I am OK with that label...because I know I also carry other labels that I value.

To each his own. Sad, really.

Amyfiddler & others that find my posts "Sad" I am surprised and it is I that feels sad for you. I say this because of your closed minds.

chazlie you are definatly the sad one

Chazlie,how sad and pathetic it is that you have to pay for physical intimacy. What is it that prevents others from engaging in personal relationships with you that lead to a bonding of sorts? In spite of your braggadaccio, you sound lonely and sad, like the last kid picked for the team.

Don't kid yourself into thinking you're special because you have partners willing to play for pay. Without the cash you're willing to fork over, your "friends" would go to the next playground and leave you to play alone.

But maybe you're not the Payer, you're the Payee. If so, your talents will fade and so will your looks and your "market value". If you think you're lonely now, just wait until age starts to show its marks on your face and body.

Come back then and tell us how great your life is.

For anyone who may be wondering if Chazlie is the norm, let me clarify. Chazlie is a classic case of a person who has been wounded at a crucial point in life - maybe more than once. He has a deficit of compassion, love and respect for women as a whole. He justifies his acting out by belittling those who live a life he cannot fathom, one of true intimacy and security. I can predict fairly easily that such a man does not have a partcularly close, loving relatioship with his own mother, and I would also guess that his wife struggles with some codependency. He would probably argue both these points, since it is so hard to look internally when such a deep pain exists.

The brain works exceedingly hard to "feel good" - and such acting out (yes, it's acting out, it's not socially acceptable, reasonable, nor is it normal) - is an attempt to make up for the pain that exists mentally and emotionally. That is the ONLY reason people are self destructive - and yes, blocking real intimacy through multple partners and infidelity is without question self destructive.

This is sad, no matter how you slice and dice it.

The initiative taken for the concern is very serious and need an
attention of every one. This is the concern which exists in the
society and needs to be eliminated from the society as soon as
possible.

Yo, atul....wasn't one of those your mother? The one in bed with the goat? No wonder you're ugly and stupid. She certainly is...and the goat, whoa! Please do eliminate yourself from society as soon as possible. Everyone who knows you will be pleased. The initiative taken for the concern is very serious and needs your attention. Yes it is true and exists.

DIE THREAD DIE!!!!!!

I found out my husband hired escorts very often, He travels for work so he would hire them where he was traveling. I had been using his computer and to my surprise I discovered his e-mails to several different girls to arrange meetings. We have been together for 27 years and he says he has been doing this for the last 10 years. I am devastated. We had a pretty good sex life until now. I made him go to the doctor to get a STD check. His results just came back negative. It still doesn't matter to me. He says he wants to try to work things out. He has an appointment with a sex addiction therapist. I feel like my head is spinning. I don't think I can forgive him. I'm giving him the opportunity to try to fix this but I don't know if I can stay.

No end to it.

No end to it.

No end to it.

I've looked at them out of curiosity but would NEVER hire one. The fact that he joked about it says to be that he is curious but not really looking to do anything.