Hiya, hiya! First, Suntide, I know what you mean about your male friend. I have one, too. (he's my male best friend, actually) Never in my wildest dreams would I have imagined anything more than friendship between us. I've known him for 10 years, and he's NOT the cheating kind. Neither am I. But, slowly and surely, and very very cautiously, things seem to be edging towards something more. Would I leave dh for him? You betcha. I've always told his wife what a lucky woman she is (she agrees, and 5 minutes later, forgets all about it and takes him for granted again). Plus, during the last two years I've been in search of a job with enough creative moxy to keep me inspired, plus financial muscle to keep me off welfare, so I can get a divorce. Is it stupid to get a divorce this late in life? My choices are 1) Stay Miserable and Married or 2) You Ain't Dead Yet -- Take A Chance. And yes, the cream does help. Of course, I don't know if it helps just by itself (... ladies? please chime in :-) or if it's the combination of homeopathy + cream. The only thing it's not helping, is the insomnia. And bone pain. Muscle pain? My memory-foam mattress feels as hard as a rock nowadays. I'll be laying on my side and my hip will wake me up, hurting, like it's mashed against some immoveable surface ... like concrete. Am I making any sense, or am I just burbling? %-) Cindy

Chinacat..."it's not the smoke, it's the slacker who's abusing it. the prayer goes 'blessed art thou who has sanctified us by thy commandments, and given us the herb of the fields' by the way... and 'treat your body as a temple' applies just as much to things like white sugar and Pringles as it does to anything else..." You said it. I do know productive members of society who smoke, and I know others who abuse their bodies with food, abuse their minds with television. It's not the guns killing people, it's the people killing people. That said, perhaps that is his one vice? If he works as hard as she says he does, he must need some time to relax. Also, is he a homeowner? I thought it was the OP's house. If it is, then expecting him to contribute and feel equal may be difficult. Have you tried interesting him in exercise? That gives a great natural high. Does he have hobbies you could share? If you're really not interested in being with him because he smokes, yet you knew he smoked, did not ever own a home, etc... prior to getting married, you set yourself up for failure. Don't blame him for your inability to change him. You married a bachelor who has the social and homemaking skills of a college student (no offense to college students!) He doesn't want to grow up. You already have. Invite him to grow up with you, or get out. You deserve more, and your kids deserve more. By the way, don't ever assume kids don't know what's going on. They will find out sooner or later, and you will have to reconcile the "don't do as I do (or DH does) but do as I say" and we know that never works. I'm sorry, but you said to be frank. I mean no judgement. Best of luck to you.

I can't believe I had to Google what I did to get here. I'm assuming I am post menopausal. I haven't had a period for almost 10 years but when I was tested is was not menopause. Btw I am 51. I can't remember what it was but a few doses of estrogen started it again but only for couple months I repeated that regimine twice before just not doing it. I liked not having a period. Fast forward 10 years I am now there however I have not had sex of any kind for 18 years. Last year I finally went into hiding from an abusive husband to whom I refused sex to for the beatings. I left him several times during my marriage but the criminal justice system let me down. He has never spent a day in jail for his crimes against me. I can't tell you what it would feel like to sit in a courtroom and hear the judge order him to anger management classes again. Which cost $50 a week so he would be waiting outside the courtroom when I would leave he would walk up and put his arm around me and tell me how bad I was gonna hurt for costing him that money. I am free now and I am suffering the worst case of horniness imaginable. I can't get anything to work and I am in tears. I don't want a man with what I have been through I just want it to stop. I am doing things in my sleep. I have to keep my nails cut off. I was in the women's shelter for abused women before getting on my feet but I can't afford doctors anymore. I left with nothing to escape it including health insurance and I walk with a limp and my face is scarred with a cheap snap on smile for the broken teeth so this is something I cannot understand and I do think men know. I assure I don't flirt or dress provactively but I am hit on all the time. My only urge is to cut their penis off and take it with me. I sure don't want the rest of them. I'm not functioning well and I have had more serious medical issues that I did get to see a doctor for those things and yes I mentioned it. For my other medical issuers the doctor said no hormones that I should give into it that it was the healthiest thing to do. What kind of crap is that? He knew what happened to me Because he stitched me up enough. He wrote a letter to the court but nothing put my husband in jail. He gave my mother a heart attack on Christmas day. He terrorized my family. So I just can't let a man touch me so I am begging to know what there is that I can do. I'm sure it would be a blessing if I had had a good man . it's too late for that now

I don't know or really care if it's a placebo effect of taking Arginmax or not, but the clinical trial data that had been reported in the media is what led me to try it. I noticed NO change in my low libido at the time I posted Jul 6th. When I posted again on the 31st and thought backward, all I could remember was that for the previous 3 weeks, my libido had kicked in again. No, it is not raging and I'm not attacking DH when the sun goes down, but am able to respond and/or initiate now on a weekly basis when there wasn't a glimmer of a chance of that happening before. I ran out of Arginmax for approx 5 days before buying more, and this weekend (when we have more free time) will tell me if that lapse has made any difference. Recommended dosage is high--6 tablets/day. I followed that the first 2 wks or so, 3 in the am/3 in the pm, then dropped back to 3/day as I was beginning to doubt the PR but at the same time didn't want to run out too soon before I'd given it at least a month. Was about ready to give up when I discovered renewed desire. I'm not saying it will work for anyone else; just that for now, it's working for me. If it's all in my head, I don't even care.