My son is going to be 20!

14 years ago

I had to think a minute...was about to type 19, but no, he is going to be 20 next month. NOT possible! I thought we would go out and see a comedian at Comedy Off Broadway in Lexington and then go out to eat. Just the two of us. I pulled up the guy who is going to be there and Lauren listened to a short clip of him and didn't think he was funny at all. Sola probably wouldn't understand the jokes because of the language barrier so I thought he and I would just go.

Sort by:Oldest

Comments (24)

houstonmom_gw
14 years ago
My son is also going to be 20! He's the youngest of 4, and his birthday is on the 26th. Happy b-day to your son! Enjoy your evening out to celebrate his birthday!
mary3444
14 years ago
Tell your son Happy B'Day. I bet no matter what you do with him it will be special. Have fun & enjoy the day.
Related Discussions
My son, my ex and my son's taxes
Q
Comments (18)
oh, definitely--have the son put a freeze on his credit w/ the credit unions, in case dad tries to take out a loan or credit card. (is it possible that dad doesn't realize the son will not get his refund bcs of this? Maybe dad thought the only party affected would be the U.S. govt? And so dad didn't think he was actually stealing from his own kid?) And help your son figure out what he'd need to prove that he is not his dad's dependent: -rent receipts and utility bills from the entire year, to prove that he paid for his own roof -ATM-card records to show that he bought groceries often from a grocery store near his home, to prove that he paid for his own food -pay stubs, other work documentation to prove that he was occupied full-time and therefore not a student If he doesn't have any of these things, he can substitute letters (notarized!) from the appropriate people--landlord, boss, roommate. "Junior was a full-/part-time employee who worked X hours a week, from Start Date to December 31, 2006"--especially if he doesn't have pay stubs w/ hours worked, etc. Also to prove he wasn't a student. Have him put it in a folder, and label it, etc., and find a place to keep it so that he'll find it when he needs it. (I keep all receipts, etc., from every tax return in a folder w/ the return itself--just in case) Another thing perhaps, to help w/ the immediate crisis, is for someone who could be a go-between (paternal uncle? paternal grandma? you?) to call the dad and tell him he needs to give his son some money to make up for the fact that he has stolen his kid's tax refund. I know you're using the term "adult" lightly, and in this situation, you *should* use it lightly. Things like this are hard for kids to learn while they're still "kids" and being taught by their parents. This sort of grownup-finances stuff is why parents' work isn't done just because a kid turns 18. This could be a good lesson for him in how to prepare documentation for court, in how to keep records of finances, etc. (all the best lessons hurt, unfort.) I wonder if your son could take him to small-claims court for the amount of the refund? print out the reply from the IRS, ask his brother to testify to the conversation? The ideal would be if he could get his hands on his dad's tax return; I don't think you can subpoena documentation for small-claims court.
...See More
My 16 year old son wants to quite private school and go to public
Q
Comments (15)
popi We are Christians and wanted a Christian education for our kids. What I have found out though is that many of kids at this school put themselves on a "I am a better Christian than you are" pedestal and judge very harshly students that don't follow their lead. My son is more outside of the box. He skateboards instead of playing football. Listens to harder rock "Christian" music than most and is does more his own thing. We are far from wealthy and don't run with they parents who are and who have seats on the board or contribute extra money to the school. My older daughter had the same experience and she left the school. She told me that the kids that got up on stage and professed their love for and commitment to Christ were the meanest, most two faced and hardest partying kids at the school. She never fit in either. I have a concern of being able to get him to school when the weather is bad since I will have to be driving SD10 to school if he goes else where. The drive to the school that we have chosen, should he go, is about 20 minutes without snow or ice. That is something that we have to discuss. My DH says that he will find those types of people at the other school and not like it there either. I agree that he will find those types of people there but since the school is much larger he probably won't be with them the entire day nor will the mold that he is expected to fit into be so strict. I want to meet with the principal and see what they have available to address his learning disabilities. I need to speak to his special ed teacher at his current school and get her honest opinion about it. I emailed her today but have not heard back from her. I will also talk to the super at his current school and let him know why my son would be leaving and that he should take a hard look at what is being learned there about being a Christian as apposed to what is being taught. I think it's a shame.
...See More
20 year old son is verbally and physically abusive to mother
Q
Comments (7)
You're participating in his assaults by NOT reporting him. How will you feel if next week he abuses that little baby and it dies? Will you feel badly that you could have done the right thing and reported it, but didn't? or will you just be glad it wasn't you he killed? I'm sorry--really I am--to be so blunt, but you're describing a very serious situation. Your son SHOULD be in jail. He won't learn to grow up and be responsible until those around him insist that he face the appropriate consequences for his actions. At the very least, Monday morning, call your lawyer, sit down with him/her, tell them everything. Find out what your responsibilities are (could you be charged with a crime if you DON'T report the crimes you know he's committed?) and what your options for protecting yourself are. Get the right answers from a professional in your jurisdiction. And while you're at it, please also research shelters in your area. Keep that info on you, just in case you or the baby's mother need it. I do wish you the best, but I also hope you realize what you have to do and do it.
...See More
Sueb20, questions about your son and college ...
Q
Comments (12)
Another here with two cents to add. I hear your worry and have watched many young adults go through this. I had a niece change schools having received a basketball scholarship but with a change in coaches and a realization she had a career in mind that school did not offer, she made a change after two years. Many young people are just not ready to choose a career path as seniors in high school, so the college they choose then does not fit when their future becomes clear. The reasons such a huge percent drop out/change schools are as varied as those making the different choices. Our youngest started last year. All the orientation information told us most change in or around freshman year. If a college can keep them into sophomore year, most stay put. With our three the visits we took to each school really solidified their wants. Truth is most students can find their major in hundreds of colleges..for mine it came down to intangibles. They just "felt" more comfortable/at home/liked the school they chose. It was the right fit. Our oldest did not appreciate much about the workings of his University. The professors were not particularly good, the business office could not get his transcript correct, it was a nightmare of fighting for credits and needed classes not offered. But he never once considered changing schools. He was very happy with the life he was living there. In the end he graduated with honors and went on to easily find a job as an electrical engineer. With each one we did not know FOR CERTAIN how they would settle in. Until tested..how does a parent ever KNOW how an off spring will do in these situations? Will they deal with being far from home, or should they be close enough to come home if they want? Is the prestige of a certain school so important to their future career, they are willing to do what ever it takes to be there? Is a smaller more intimate campus more in tune with their personality? Is the debt load they will incur logical given other school choices that would be much less? Our second child chose a very small campus. For a gal who dreams of living in NYC one day I was a bit surprised she didn't go for a larger University. She LOVES IT. She is editor of the paper,does theater productions, writing a blog for her Student Support Services office. Our youngest will graduate in three years due to credits earned in high school. She is already sad. She LOVES everything about college life. She began her search for a school with the attitude I will NEVER consider school at _______. In the end that is exactly where she chose. The campus visits made all the difference. Truth is there is no one path to assure success,both my brother and I took a year off mid way through college..we both changed majors but not schools and finished. If it happens it does not have to be the end of the world. Sometimes the lessons learned in those situations are what that person needed to become who they are to be. Bottom line lesson I learned with three transitioning from high school to college so many of the SO IMPORTANT are not, once the choice is made and their lives have begun. High School, SENIOR YEAR angst looks so silly when looking back from their first visit home from college!!!
...See More
Kathsgrdn
Original Author
14 years ago
Thanks! Happy birthday to your son too, Houstonmom!
socks
14 years ago
That's wonderful!
summer_tx
14 years ago
That just seems so foreign to me Kath, like it's not even possible. I can imagine that you feel that way and much more! :) I like your idea of the two of you going out for a comedy club experience together. You're a good Mom Kath! Always have been.
glenda_al
14 years ago
Just sharing a picture when ya'll stopped by my place for a visit.
Georgysmom
14 years ago
The years pass quickly. My daughter is going to be 50! Just how did that happen?
carol_in_california
14 years ago
It has been wonderful following his life via your postings.
You are an inspiration!
sue_va
14 years ago
Kath, are you sure? ;-) He was just a little boy not long ago!

You have done such a good job with him and Lauren, and the exchange kids, and the dogs and cats, and the surgery and weight loss. What am I forgetting? Oh, yeah . . . your job!

You deserve this:{{gwi:1581906}}

Sue
phyllis__mn
14 years ago
That just doesn't seem possible....where has the time gone. I have to echo Sue's post above....I'm so impressed with how you have handled your life.
kim_okla
14 years ago
How can that be? We haven't aged, how did he grow up?
pekemom
14 years ago
My oldest son is going to be 40 this January.. ack!! He's old enough to be the father of your son..double ack!!!!
How could this happen to me??? Oh wait, I'm 65 this Jaunuary, never mind....
OklaMoni
14 years ago
and life goes on. :)

Mine are 37 and 35... and they are the coolest daughters ever.

But it sure seems like yesterday at times.... and one thinks of them when they were small/younger.

Kath, enjoy your evening out with him.

Moni
lynn_d
14 years ago
Wow, what an accomplishment! Good job Kathleen!So you had a child at 10? LOL!!!!
jel48
14 years ago
Happy Birthday to your son! Mine (my baby) turned 30 in October. Those years do go by so fast...
bigfoot_liz
14 years ago
Happy Birthday to him! I was going to say something similiar to Lynn LOL so ya started really early huh?! LOL ;-)) how is college going for him??? ~ liz
susanjf_gw
14 years ago
dd1 is going to be 40 in may! our 42n anniversary(feb)...
dees_1
14 years ago
Kath, you need to "do" ages like I do. Sum the numbers in your age. Your son's not turning 20; he'll be 2.

This is how you never grow old!
kacram
14 years ago
wow.. hard to believe. I hope you guys have fun!
Kathsgrdn
Original Author
14 years ago
Liz, he is doing good at UK. I worry about him finding a job when he's done with the economy the way it is.

Glenda, I can't believe that was 8 years ago!

I was talking to a patient of mine yesterday, he was a little older than me and his clock wasn't working in his room. The battery was corroded so I got him another one and he was joking about how last year went by too fast. I told him because he was old, like me...the older you get the faster time goes. LOL! It's true, when you're young you can't wait to become an adult and do your own thing, but as soon as you hit 21 it's like a speeding train.
grinch_gut
14 years ago
I can't believe he is going to be 20! Gosh I remember watching him grow up also! Amazing happy birthday to him!
bigfoot_liz
14 years ago
Kath, is he in Physics, math or engineering right??? i remember it was something similiar to my dh, mechanical engineering. he will have NO PROBLEM finding a job in math, sciences or engineering as long as he gets A's or B+'s. my DH has never applied for any jobs and for 3 yrs now job offers are constantly coming in from all over the country thru the job center at school (UCF). a year and a half ago he got an engineering job w city of orlando as engineerng project manager because he belonged to this ASHREA (HVAC) organization he joined thru UCF. the job offers have ranged from the low of $65,000 for a BS (all over FL) to a high of $100,000 in Huntsville AL for a BS. the MS offers are even higher than that...don't let the bad PR scare you if you do very well in school the jobs will find you. jobs outside this country pay the most. every single person DH has known for 4.5 yrs at UCF has found a well paying job in mechanical or aerospace engin. The exception is 1 person w a GPA of 3.0/4.0 took him a year to find a job and had to take remedial courses to get into a MS program at UIC (univ IL chicago). most jobs in these fields expect you to continue to MS and get your PE stamps, those that don't, don't pay well. my dh is about to start his very last graduate semester, 2 classes, and we are done and can finally figure out where we will go!

now i will say to get into master's programs in sciences or engineering has become extremely difficult w sooo many people going back to college in this economy. the minimum GPA for 2010 mech engineering was 3.8/4.00 and they had mostly 4.0's filling all the spots. the program is sooo full they also have high requirements to stay in. 2 C's and you are out...1 C and you are on probation and have to repeat the class which might as well be death to your MS degree because then you will have trouble finding a job after all that... don't worry about him finding a job, he will! it is also in the best interest of the school to help students find jobs as those #'s are tracked and touted for those that get their students out in the working world! ~ liz
Kathsgrdn
Original Author
14 years ago
Liz his major is Physics.
Marilyn Sue
14 years ago
Here's wishing him a happy birthday and hope you both have a great time together.

Sue

My son is going to be 20!

Comments (24)

houstonmom_gw

mary3444

Related Discussions

Kathsgrdn
Original Author

socks

summer_tx

glenda_al

Georgysmom

carol_in_california

sue_va

phyllis__mn

kim_okla

pekemom

OklaMoni

lynn_d

jel48

bigfoot_liz

susanjf_gw

dees_1

kacram

Kathsgrdn
Original Author

grinch_gut

bigfoot_liz

Kathsgrdn
Original Author

Marilyn Sue

COMPANY

BUSINESS SERVICES

GET HELP

CONNECT WITH US

My son is going to be 20!

Comments (24)

Related Discussions

KathsgrdnOriginal Author

KathsgrdnOriginal Author

KathsgrdnOriginal Author

COMPANY

BUSINESS SERVICES

GET HELP

CONNECT WITH US

Kathsgrdn
Original Author

Kathsgrdn
Original Author

Kathsgrdn
Original Author