Writing Our Life Stories: Assignment One
Lois Daniel, the author of the book I'm working from, suggests setting up a looseleaf binder with lined pages to use as your "memory bank." The idea is to write down memories and ideas for what you want to include in your story, and stash them in the binder. She also suggests that you write the name of each assignment at the top of the first 50 pages of the binder. So you'd have one page labeled "Parents & Grandparents," one labeled "Birth," etc.
I haven't done this, partly because I write very little in longhand. I figured if I need to keep a memory bank, I could easily do it in the form of a Word file on my computer. It's up to you how you want to handle this. As for writing the story, again, Iim doing it on the computer. I set up a folder called My Memoir, and each chapter will have its own file.
Here's my condensed version of the author's Ground Rules:
Don't worry at all about how your writing sounds. Just write whatever comes into your head, as if you were writing to your closest friend. We can talk about revision, if necessary, when we're finished.
Be yourself. Write the way you talk.
Be honest. Don't write about things as you wish they'd been; write about them the way they actually were. Take time to think through each incident and be sure you're telling it exactly as it happened, without anything you may have added mentally through the years.
Don't let your story be just a sterile recital of events. Write about your feelings and opinions. Talk about your relationships with the people in your family, your co-workers, schoolmates, etc. How did you feel about them?
Whenever possible, relate things that happened in the distant past to things that have happened in the present or recent past. This isn't always possible, but when it is, it will greatly enrich your story.
Remember to include humor. Your life wasn't all serious, so don't let your descendants think it was. Tell them about things that made you laugh when they happened, and other things that didn't seem funny at the time but inspired laughter later.
Share a little wisdom with your descendants. What sustained you through life's rough spots? The people who read your story are bound to have difficult times, and it may help them to know you had problems and survived. But don't lecture them!
Describe the scenes in which the events you recount took place. Did the kitchen have a wood stove? Kerosene lamps? A rag rug? (Lois wrote this book 30 years ago.)
The first topic she assigns is your birth. Again, I didn't do this. I took a topic that appears later on the list, "Parents & Grandparents," and put it at the top because I felt it was important to introduce the people who made my birth possible. Since my family is to a large extent more interesting than I, and because I wanted to answer questions I know my kids will someday regret not asking, I've spent more time than I planned on this chapter. In fact, I'm not finished yet, so I'll writing more on it this week.
The author says that although your parents, and perhaps your grandparents, will appear in many of the stories you write about your life, you should, if possible, include some information about their character and background in a section of your book devoted entirely to them. Include dates and places of births, marriages, deaths, etc. (Oops--I forgot the dates!) If your parents and grandparents are deceased, perhaps some of their friends are still living and would be glad to answer questions.
Here's a small excerpt from my "Parents & Grandparents" chapter:
I wonder why "Grandpa Brockmeyer" was the name I gave my mother's father. He was my only living Grandpa, so you'd think the single name would have sufficed. I grew up thinking of him as silent and distant. I danced with him once, probably at my cousin Terry's wedding, but don't recall exchanging a word with him. I hope my memory is at fault. I hope we had a lovely conversation. I've been told since that he was a very nice, kind and thoughtful man. He had been through a lot, losing his wife unexpectedly and then his beloved oldest daughter, Dorothy. Undoubtedly he knew his third daughter was an alcoholic. Like I said, he'd been through a lot. I'm sorry to say I don't remember when he died.
Be prepared for this project to an emotional experience at times. I expected to have some difficult things to write about, but I didn't expect one of them to be my grandmother, Lucky, who lived with us most of my childhood. When I wrote about her dying at age 88 in a state mental hospital (she had senility, possibly Alzheimer's, but we never heard of that in 1961), I had a bit of a meltdown. I guess I had some unresolved issues, and I think many of us do.
So.....Your first assignment is Parents & Grandparents. Is this enough information to get you started? If you want to do the looseleaf binder and would like to have the topics of all the assignments--or if you want them for any other reason--I can type them out for you. Feel free to ask any questions you might have.
darrah
alisandeOriginal Author
Related Discussions
Raccoon Story (real life)
Q
Life Writing, Ever Do It?
Q
Writing Our Life Stories: Assignment Two
Q
Writing Our Life Stories: Assignment Three
Q
jannie
Pieonear
jel48
Jodi_SoCal
bee0hio
mawheel
hgl_gaylemarie
yayagal
Lily316
ruthieg__tx
ronf_gw
alisandeOriginal Author
joyfulguy
nanny98