Yes, what goes around comes around- despite our best attempts to prevent it. Annaleef, you and I need to get together and have a vintage treasures garage sale- free up some closet space! My girls love vintage clothing and one (I have to admit) darling dress DD2 bought on eBay looked strangely familiar. My mother says I wore it to my HS graduation in the mid-seventies. Has anyone's child come home from school and announced they have to dress up for '80s day'? Frightening! My uniform for the eighties was either reverse drag (the small-man-with-a-tie outfit) or my maternity wear, which consisted of a either a long sweatshirt, leggings, scrunchy thick aerobic sox and high-top Reebocks; or oddly desexualizing pink or blue shorts sets with peter-pan collars for the summer pregnancy. My girls were horrified at my 80s wear, and for good reason.

Always wear gear, regardless of the weather or the distance. I have both what my hubby calls a three-quarter helmet and a full-face helmet, several pairs of HD over the ankle boots, and some darn good leathers. On really hot days I'll wear jeans, boots, helmet (that goes without saying), gloves, and a leather vest. Admittedly I should wear a leather jacket when riding in hot weather but I don't always listen to my brain. I have never ever ridden in shorts and never will. If it's so hot that the heat takes your breath away when riding, then I don't ride. Been there, done that and it wasn't pleasant. Mike, in-town riding is the same as out-of-town riding, be protected at all times. I'm not sure if it was on this thread or another one on this forum but someone said that it's always best to dress for the dump and not the ride (or something like that). That is something that my husband has drilled into my head from the very first day I got on the back of a bike with him and now it's just second nature, moreso when I started riding my own bike. This is an example why and one that I hope never to repeat. Four years ago my husband rode his bike to work. Something happened to him at work and he was rushed to the hospital. Turns out everything was ok but he didn't want to leave his bike at his office. So we went to get it in my car. We live a couple towns over from where his office is and decided to come home thru the adjoining towns instead of the freeway. Because it was a warm day he decided not to wear his leather jacket (which he always wears, even in 100+ weather) and he tossed it into the car. He did put his chaps on, altho that did surprise me. Anyway, to make a long story longer, I was following him home in the car. As he was about to enter a large intersection on a green light a SUV came from the stopped direction going about 60+ MPH. This vehicle had gone around all the other stopped vehicles to run this red light. Several things helped keep him from being killed. One was his riding expertise (he's been riding since he was 6 and he's 57 now), his helmet, and the crash guards on his Harley and his chaps. The expertise came into play when he realized that if he hit the SUV broadside that he would die but if he laid the bike down there was a chance that he would miss hitting the vehicle. He was already down when the SUV went by him but he still could have reached out and touched the back panel. If he had swerved the bike instead of laying it down, it most likely would have been worse. His helmet saved his head and the crash guards saved his leg before he was able to get away from it and his chaps prevented road rash and possibly a broke leg or two. Believe me, it was the most horrifying thing to watch and think that your husband is going to be killed right in front of your eyes. To watch him rolling away from the bike and the bike skidding across the intersection was scary, especially since I at first thought that he had actually hit the SUV. Altho it was a rare thing for him not to wear a leather jacket that day, it did teach him never to be without it. His arms still show the scars but those are nothing compared to what could have happened. And the SUV? It never even slowed or stopped. Another driver who was in the right hand turn lane going in the same direction as we were chased the SUV and she came back and told the cops that it sped up and she lost it when it hit the nearby freeway entrance going about 100. Amazingly, two off duty paramedics were in a car waiting at the red light as was an off duty CHP officer waiting for the red going in the other direction. We had cops, CHP, and an ambulance there almost within minutes. I'm sorry this is so long, but I seemed to have almost relived this accident all over again as I was writing. Anyway, Mike, you never know when something might happen, altho we all hope that nothing ever does happen. You could be pulling out of your driveway or pulling into church. You don't know the if's or when's or even that something could happen. Always ride safe. Here's two more examples of something that can happen that is totally unexpected. A bunch of us were on a ride up to Reno, Nevada, via Lake Tahoe two years ago. In the middle of nowhere a basketball came whizzing across the road. Our friend dumped her bike cuz she thought it was a dog at first. Nothing hurt but her ego. All she could do was lay there on the side of the road, laughing, and saying something to the effect of "you mean a f**king basketball made me lay it down?" A couple months ago my sister and BIL were on a ride with their HOG group up in the mountains and the lead rider got nailed by a deer. He spent almost a month in the hospital and was told that if he hadn't of had his full leathers on and his full face helmet that it would have been alot worse, if he had survived at all. The deer was killed. Does stuff like this make me apprehensive and not want to ride? Oh h*ll no!!!! But I am more aware. Ok, again I'm sorry about this being so long...just couldn't stop myself. :)) Jenna

I read through the OP & some of the posts, but stopped at this one & had to respond before I continue on with reading the rest of the posts. (so forgive me if I missed something that was posted after this) "Why can't you respect someone who works 2 jobs (see your first post)? What is not to respect about that? Did anyone notice this comment????" I noticed it. My first thought was "at least she's working". I've also had similar difficulty with my own feelings/judgments, etc regarding my SD12's BM. She is 38 and has never worked a real job. She was lucky enough to get a minimum wage office job, instead of fast food... but a real job that gave her some good responsibility, but she screwed that up by stealing from her boss & ended up being convicted of embezzelment. Now, at 38+, how is she ever going to work & support herself? I stuggle with judging her for that because I have worked since I was 14 and often worked 2 jobs to support my kids... she sits on her backside all day, thinking of ways to get others to take care of her. Our values & lifestyles are such a stark contrast to each other, I cannot relate to her at all. It's much easier to judge & criticize her than to try & understand something I can't begin to comprehend. Just as I can't understand her relationship (or lack thereof) with her kids... I loved kids, I wanted kids & when I had my kids, I live for them... there's nothing I wouldn't do for them. I can't count the sleepless nights, how many miles I've driven to do things for them, everything I've gone without so they can have. So, I don't get someone that lets her child run around in the cold with shorts & no shoes. I don't get someone that relies on others to be taken care of when I know eventually, those people will be gone. and what bothers me most, which really ISN'T my problem, is that she is modeling her "everyone should take care of me" lifestyle to her daughter... and if falls back on me & DH. I wonder what it will be like when SD is 25 & has kids... can't keep a relationship together (like her mom) and comes back to us for help. She won't go to her mom because her mom is already nearly 40 and can't even get a minimum wage job because she's a convicted thief. I guess in a way, my opinion or judgment of BM could be seen that I think I'm better than her... and there is some truth to it. I am proud that I supported my kids, raised my kids, and would do anything for my kids. If I were a BM that wouldn't work, fought supporting my kids, let someone else raise my kids & made excuses every time my kids needed something or wanted me to come to one of their things... then I would feel like a loser. But, that comes from MY perspective from the parent that I am. I can't understand what someone else feels when they do things so differently. There is no shame in manual labor at any age. There is no shame in an honest day's work at any age. I can only imagine that someone "at her age" chooses to be a waitress because she may enjoy the interaction with customers... she may be a bus driver because she enjoys being around kids & likes the schedule. It's not always about the money or prestige. My aunt started a landscaping company at age 55 when she divorced her husband. It's something I would never do but she enjoys it. I gave up a secure office job with benefits to have the freedom of self employment but sometimes, when the phones don't ring for days & the bank account starts dwindling... and I don't have my bi weekly paycheck to count on, it's scary but I love what I do so it's worth it to me. I try to understand SD's BM... not working, etc. I imagine she enjoys each day, sleeping in & playing games on her computer all day without a worry in the world. I couldn't do it, but I am getting better at seeing another perspective.

Well I'm done with the first part. I don't want to say too much in case someone from the firm reads this forum. But I could have definitely gone casual -- I was immediately shown to a conference room and given the test. The only employee I saw was a guy wearing a t shirt and cargo shorts who met me at the door and handed me the test and collected it at the end. And the test was surprisingly hard given the level of position I applied for so who knows if there will even be an interview. Oh well -- even if it nothing comes of it, it was definitely an interesting way to dip my toes in the job market.