I would post this on the "entertaining forum" This forum isn't used much & mostly showing problem with fence or pump or something. Or people trying to sell something for your yard. Party ideas are over at "entertainment forum" They are folks that do have parties. If that doesn't work you might try Holidays forum as it is very active & many of them have parties so might be able to help you out.

The wording "gift expected" really strikes me as UGLY. We gave our two (one left) who graduated parties to celebrate them--not to collect gifts. Yes it is wonderful when people feel inspired to give something but "expected" NEVER; not at my home anyway. Sadly I understand I am in the minority and that has always made the invitation list difficult. We invited people who were there at important junctures in their 18 years, and some of those were so long ago..well expecting a gift is just not what it is about. Thanking them for their part in raising up this child was the point...we were celebrating together. It is so sad how America has lost focus on what is important!! Around here group parties are becoming more and more common. The belief is 90% of those attending would attend both separate parties if they were held, so why not combine!! In the rare case where an invited guest only knows one of the students WHY would you feel obligated to give a card or gift?? That makes no sense!! Don't sign their book and they won't even know you were there!!! Graduates/friends attempt to hit all the parties, because they want everyone to come to theirs. The gift they bring or not is usually reflected in how close they are to the guest of honor. It should be about what your son WANTS to give and what he/you can afford. Not what is "expected"!!!

I too think you might want to offer something more substantial as a late-night snack. For one thing, a lot of the kids will probably have been too keyed up to do justice to dinner, for another, they will probably be up most of the night. Your husband's idea is a good one in that with a cheese & cracker tray, the kids can munch as they please...but maybe make it a bit more substantial with the addition of some cold cuts, rolls & a condiment selection? Feeding twenty teenagers can be expensive, so a container of tuna or egg salad could round things out a bit. Lord knows when and how the kids will wake up...early, late, all in a bunch or by dribs and drabs? I think your husband has the right general idea, again. Grab 'n' Eat stuff can work no matter how they wake. Muffins, bagels, doughnuts. Some butter, jam, cream cheese & fruit. One suggestion on the non-menu side, is to have somebody responsible for cleaning up the leftovers before everyone drops off to sleep. Dunno what the varmint make up is on your brother-in-law's land, but one hungry skunk could give them all a graduation to remember. :P

Thanks A2. She really likes her new job too. Now one off the payroll, two more to go (they will be college sophomores next year). Just finished the last of the party food. I am completely unable to cook an appropriate amount of food. We are always eating it for days! I made egg salad in the VM today. It was too smooth. I think it would have been fine with a smaller amount. Do you think I can grind coffee in the VM?