I can't resist telling bad puns, and hearing my family groan at them!

Well for the last few days I've been singing "come on Irene...toora loora toora loo rye aye" instead of "come on Eileen". (And yes, I just looked up the lyrics because I couldn't imagine how to type out the toora loora part. So now the whole foolish song can be stuck in my head and not just one line.)

I can't resist saying "just for the halibut" whenever I serve halibut.

I suspect I will now be thinking about the Culture Club song next time I use thyme. I guess I'm easily influenced.

I have special names that I croon to my dog every night when he snuggles in my lap: fuzzy wuzzy, sugar pie, mr. snuggles, etc. He loves it.

I whistle sometimes, and when I do it's always the looney tunes song. And I call my dog Little Miss, Baby Dear, Little fox, and baby princess, etc.

Whenever there is an extra silly word or phrase said, I tell my family that it would make a great name for a band.

In an announcer's voice.....

The best rock band in the world, from Chicago, Illinois, it's Spider Poop!

hahahahaha, good one deedee

I did this a few weeks ago and again this morning. Great timing!

I bought a bakery cake for a party we're throwing on Thursday. (I'm freezing it.)

My dh and I went to the store together. As I was getting the cake out of the car, it's super hot outside!...I started singing "MacArthur Park" sung by Richard Harris.

MacArthur's Park is melting in the dark
All the sweet, green icing flowing down...
Someone left the cake out in the rain
I don't think that I can take it
'cause it took so long to bake it
And I'll never have that recipe again
Oh, no!

And THEN I kept singing it in the kitchen and I got real loud and my dh stops what he was doing and just looks at me and cracks up. lol

Ok, so I thought I was the only one who would sing songs when there was food involved. Or whistled, or told bad puns. Or sing to their pets. Glad to know I'm not alone.

I whistle ALL the time, and don't realize I'm doing it until I see people staring.

I make up goofy songs, too...and sing them to my pets mostly, but sometimes about what I'm doing or to my DH, and even to the kids. I used to do it all the time when they were little. The one they HATE to this day is the 'Chickles song' Sung to the toon of Miss Mary had a steamboat: Goood morning little chickles, good morning to you, good morning little chickles, it's time to go to school. I'd sing that every morning to wake them up and wouldn't stop till they were all out of bed. I sometimes call them in the morning and sing it to them.

I also sing along to my iPod when I'm wearing the headphones.

I do so many corny things that it's hard to settle on just one, but since pets were mentioned, I have to say that one of the silly things I routinely do is call my cats ridiculous names. Pip is Dogloo or Pippy-dog. (And yes, he is cat - not a dog at all. ;-)) Molly is Bowlie-Pin. Tiger is Glisherman. Pooh is Budapest. (Need I go on? No, I think not.)

Oh heck, I'll just say something even more bizarre: DH and I both refer to certain bathroom bodily functions as "Making Bears." We have South Park to thank for that. Horrid, but it's stuck with us for years now.

(I think I just provided entirely Too Much Information. Sorry about that!)
:-/

When I would hear a particularly weird name or odd-sounding name; for example, watching a movie and the neighbor's name was Beulah-Jane, I would turn to my daughter and tell her that before I picked her name, I almost named her Beulah-Jane. Or hearing a neighbor call their little dog Sparticus, I would exclaim in surprise to my teen son, "That's amazing!! Your dad chose Sparticus for your middle name when you were born, but I talked him into Ryan!!" My kids have been rolling their eyes for years over all the near misses I've told them about.

Red

You people are crazy weird! LOL!
No, I absolutely, positively don't do anything corny without realizing it. (Anything my dog will tell you is not legally admissible in court.)

Well...my cat Jasmine is constantly telling me things I need to do, what she thinks, etc. Like, "Mom...you need to brush your teeth...go brush them!" or if I'm scared when I'm driving, I hear her little cat voice telling me, "It's just a road mom, it's just a road." Just last night she told me she has new nicknames for the entire family. She said, "Mom, you're Dixie, I'm Doodle, & dad's a Doosie!"

Okay, Ttodd, I realize you asked for corny, not crazy. Guess in our household we always cross that line!

Red, that is funny. I don't have kids but I think I will be stealing your idea and doing it to nieces & nephews & friend's kids.

How could I forget to share this? My favorite joke is corny -

What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you want to, he can't hear you.

hhireno - love it! My favorite corny joke is: A guy walks up to a horse and says, "Hey buddy, why the long face?"

Ba-dum-PUM!

The best political bumper sticker I ever saw was in support of Kerry and it was

WHY NOT THE LONG FACE?

One of the corniest things my family does is we never name our cat. Now, get this, we never go out and select a cat, but we always have one. We live in the country, but on a rural side road not far from our little town, and it seems to be the dropping off spot for cats that folks want to get rid of. One always shows up on my patio and of course we adopt it and feed it and take care of it, but it is always called "The Cat". The one we currently have is huge, has been spayed, very lovable. We are getting more creative with this one - her name is "The Fat Cat".

Seriously, this one is a keeper - she doesn' seem to be going anywhere, our GD loves her, DH won't admit it but her loves her also, the dog loves her.

DH and I use the animals to communicate with each other. Example:

Me: "Poco, tell your papa that he needs to go bring in the garbage can like he said he would."

DH: "Tell your mama that I'm doing something right now and that garbage can isn't going anywhere."

Me: "Poco, tell your Papa that he is causing mama grief."

I have a stupid little song I sing every morning to my son--it's awful, tuneless and mangles his name. He inevitably groans, I inevitably crack up. He's leaving tomorrow for his freshman year--I hope I don't cry when I sing it for him! I'm an awful singer under the best of circumstances.

I have a t-shirt from a local cupcakery with an image of a huge cupcake on the front and I like to wear it to the gym.

I like to lay in bed with my boxer gazing into my eyes and I say, "Puty gurl, are you a puty gurl? You so puty gurl, oh my puty gurl." DH says this goes on for far too long.

I like to sing very loud and with a country twang when I'm driving - alone or with poor passengers.

I try to do my best "booty bounce" for DH on occasion. Not pretty or sexy or appealing in any way but it makes him laugh. If you don't know what a "booty bounce" is, just google.

Oh I forgot one!

I've been calling my DS "Pooker" since he was born. He is now 24yo and I still call him "Pooker" . . . especially in public.

jakabedy, I hope you're not a divorce attorney...

I sing Shirley Temple songs but I don't remember the words so I make them up. My grandson loves them and doesn't care that I can't carry a tune.

Out of the blue, I like to say movie lines. "We'll always have Paris, here's looking at you kid, apple pie it's delicious, we're gonna need a bigger boat, it's your job to be old" They may not be famous lines but something that DH and I have repeated over the years.

Fav kid-style corny joke:

Q.Why do elephants paint their toe-nails red?

A.So they can hide in cherry trees!!!!

Q. Have you ever SEEN an elephant in a cherry tree????

A. SEE -- IT WORKS!!!!

((yep -- kids LOVE this joke ......! LOL!))

.....

We do SO many many corny weird stuff. Singing all kinds of songs, fun names for everyone in the family ....

Latest ones (from the movie Despicable Me)

a)"Assemble the Minions!!"

b)"its so FLUFFY"

c)"Light Bulb"

These are great! I'm really getting to see a different side of you all!

I have an admitted obsession w/ people's names. It's corny because I like to turn peoples names into a sentence or an object. And I will go on and on and on making them up and cracking myself up. You have no idea what I'm talking about so here are a few example's:

I went to school w/ a guy whose last name was Houtz. I kept asking him if he was going to name his daughter Ima w/ the middle name Haunted. Ima Haunted Houtz. I can't stop laughing!!!!!!

Okay - I was in the Marine Corps w/ a guy whose last name was Person. You know I suggested Ima.

My middle name is Autumn. It's a good thing I didn't marry anybody w/ the last name Mobile. Or Matic.

W/ the volume and diversity of patients that we see I crack myself up and everybody else just wonders. It's so funny to me that I don't even bother apologizing anymore - I just walk away making up more.

I say things to my dog I wouldn't say in public like "mommy loves you" or "go potty... GOOD go potty!". When our dogs were young I'd holler out "All puppies who want to go for a walk meet at the door!" and they'd come barreling down the hall to the front door.

I also like to go up to the dog (he's a Lab) and say "Kisses!", then starting at his forehead I give him little kisses all the way down to his nose, each time saying "kisses!". He's learned what's coming when I first say Kisses and sits very still while closing his eyes. Cracks me up that he closes his eyes like a pre-teen waiting to receive her first kiss. Silly dog.

Because he knows I hate it, if I'm in the bathroom when Dh sits down on the "john", he will hold out his arm and say "pull my finger!" I learned after the first time not to comply. That doesn't stop him though, he pulls it himself and you can guess what happens next. Have you noticed there's a part of a man's brain that never tires of adolescent humor?

Kelly I chuckled at the cupcake shirt.

Each cat has a made up theme song. I'm always talking to them. The one meows a lot and I'll pretend we're having an indepth conversation.
Kitty - Meow
Me - I know, right!?
Kitty - Meow
Me - That's what I said.
etc.

Each cat also has a made up story. The one always dreamed of being a meterologist but never got the job because he's just too furry. It goes on.

We also have voices and things we think each would say or sound like if they could talk.

We pick songs and phrases from movies or even commercials and walk around singing, saying, and dancing to them.
My favorite commercial right now is the back to school Denium Target commercial, the guy LOOKS and SOUNDS like someone we know. "Denium...Shawn White Hoodies and Denium!"

We like the Nickeloden Angry Beavers theme song. We have our own goofy jig we'll do while obnoxiously singing it.

Here is a link that might be useful: angry beavers theme song

I just caught myself mindlessing whistling "Alouette" at work!

Shee, your kitty missed out on his calling as a meteorologist? (so sad...just due to too much fur!)

My kitty used to have a boyfriend named George when we lived in PA who was the proprietor of the Inn of the Falcon! His specialty was red-cooked falcon. Jasmine & he would picnic at Sand Island. (These are real places in Lehigh Valley, PA.) Yes the stories go on & on! Thought DH & I were the only ones. Whaddya know?

If I'm in the right mood when cooking dinner, I'll have the music on and sing along, using my mixing spoon (or whatever's in my hand) as a microphone -- now, I don't do this when I'm alone, I do it only when the kids are with me, because it makes them squirm and wonder if mom has lost it.

We also make our dogs talk. Doesn't everyone do that? You know, the dog will make a particular sort of face and DH will use a "doggie voice" to put words in her mouth. Of course, each of our dogs has a different voice.

DH has been singing the Barney theme song ("I love you, you love me...") and the ABC song at bedtime for our DD for about 8 years. She is 10 and still wants him to do this every night.

That's it. Otherwise we are perfectly normal.

Huh - I always thought it was perfectly normal to have a conversation with one's cat, especially when they respond. (I like to think that the cat is corny and not me).
When my sons (now early 20's) leave the house, I always do this,even when they are with friends, I say to them "bye, bye, I love you, mon petit choux" (my little cabbage). I've been doing it since they were little.

Have you noticed there's a part of a man's brain that never tires of adolescent humor?

You mean that's supposed to be relegated to men only? ::gulp::

I'm always babbling random lines from movies...

DW & DD "know" I'm wacko. I think they look @ me funny too?!

From Austin Powers: "It's a MAN baby...", or "AUSTIN!"
Star-Trek VI: "Cry HAVOC, let slip the dogs of War...".
" " Doomsday Machine...."They say there's no devil Jim, but there is, RIGHT OUT OF HELL I saw it"!!

Or...there's KISS's famous intro....
"You wanted the best, you got the best, the HOTTEST BAND in the world....KIIIIISSSSS"

...Oh there's many more....!

Faron

Well with 10 cats in the house, and two bunnies, I am always talking to them aloud. Heck, I'm on record here as actually paying an animal communicator to "talk" to them (she does it telepathically, then sends me email of what they talked about). So actually verbalizing to them in person doesn't seem so corny.

I suppose one of the oddest things my DH and I do is name everything. The cars have names (Bror, Gustav, Hexa, Bing, Blueberry, Emma, Jimbo, Sharq, Bunners, to name a few over the years); the fire truck's name is Miss Charlotte; the big tractor is Snow Lady; the giant lawn mower is Miss Kitty; the smaller mower is actually Big Mo; the experimental garden tiller (with counter-revolutionary tines) is Trotsky and the regular one is King Cole; my tractor is Spider-Woman; another here is called Great Leap Forward; all the computers have had names such as Miss Miles, Lappers, Gladys, Zeus, Pussy, and Bertie; we call our plane, Hawkie; even the water system pressure tank has a name: Shamu.

I suppose as we progress (further?) into our dotage we'll even start talking to them. Oh, snap, we already do that! Uh-oh....

L

Advice for the day: if you are ever attacked by a bunch of clowns, go for the juggler!

Back before my kids were grown up enough to fend for themselves, when I had dinner on the table I liked to intone: Dinner is Served, except with my interpretation of a plummy butler's accent: DiNUH is SUHved. My husband hates that. Which used to make me do it even more frequently.

My daughter is the master (mistress) of quoting lines from movies; she has the complete intonation down. Cracks me up every time. Right now she likes to hit me with a quote from Bridesmaids: "Ellen knows the owner." "You DOOOO?" For anyone who has seen the film, picture that phrase being tossed out at any time or moment all day long.

My son likes to reenact the Lion King scene in which little Mustafa gets held up to behold his kingdon...using our idiot cat Janis, who is so fat that her belly wiggles while she is having her paws waved wildly in the air and my son is doing that tribal chant.

My husband wears his work jeans over and over and over before washing them, and he likes to come in from being out in the backyard, covered in dirt, and haul the waistband up nearly to his armpits while telling me to 'give sexy guy a kiss'. Oh, he is also always sweating bullets and the work jeans have holes in the knees that extend nearly to his ankles. What a vision.

Sometimes at night (all alone) making sure all the blinds and drapes are drawn, I turn on music and dance like crazy. (lol)

You make me LOL!

Today I came across someone w/ the last name Bliss. Seriously how can you not LOL thinking about Seymour Bliss?!!!!

i LOVE to sing (unfortunately i don't sing well...)- my favorite place to sing-loud- is in the car-probably because the radio is always on! of course, as the kids got older, they hated it. my youngest just got his driver's license, so i have spent ALOT of the last year driving around with him while he had his permit! i had to chuckle many times as he would loudly sing along to some of his favorite songs!

also, i happen to love weird al---think he's so creative and think his job would be one of the best!!! so much fun! anyway, i love making up words to songs too and seem to do it all the time! again, the kids groan, but they have learned to play along! we are currently raising a little guide dog puppy and my latest is dedicated to him to the tune of 'yankee doodle dandy'.

Stinky - Ha, that's cool. :) I figured DH and I were the only ones!

Jen - I got a laugh out of "making bears" :D