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better now

20 years ago

i am feeling a bit better, thank god. i still cry but not as bad as i did.im still trying to find a support group but not having any luck at it.i think i would be so much better if i could find one, everyone else has moved on and are doing great.i think its harder for me because my son died and that same week my daughter moved out so i lost both at once.thanks for all your support.

love nancy

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Comments (4)

socks
20 years ago
Wow, you had two major losses at once. I know you are still suffering greatly, but I'm glad you are feeling a little better. It just takes so much time, and you just go ahead and cry all you need to.

You are so wise to reach out by looking for a support group. Have you called local hospitals or churches? Maybe others here will have some suggestions.

Take care,

Susan
sudiepav
20 years ago
I'm glad you're doing better. Losing a child is the most difficult thing a person can deal with. You are so lucky your son had children that you can love. Our son's only child was killed with him, and so he's totally gone. His wife has remarried, and it seems as though it's just his dad and me, plus his brothers who miss him so much. We are heartened by the friends of ours and his who still remember and miss him. our youngest boy's in-laws went a couple of weeks ago to Italy. On their trip they met a couple from Naples, FL where Dave and Millie lived, and this couple knew him and remembered him so fondly. It comforted us greatly to know that half a world away, he was mentioned and remembered. Please be strong and know that so many of us here care about you and keep you in their thoughts and prayers. Take care.
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It was so nice to come home from work today and see restored order. Several of you were on the mark about the hot shower and cold drink. However, yesterday called for beer. I had a couple of ice cold brews on the patio and was asleep by 10:00. Let's face it, gardening in August can be brutal. To be honest, I'm not sure how much I would have been out there even without the kitchen remodel excuse. There's always so much going on at the end of summer. Something or other would have probably distracted me. But I'm going to remember this and be prepared next year. I really could have done a better job of cutting back things to prolong their bloom. I will never be a gardening fool in August, but I'll at least keep up with the bare mimimum. The kitchen remodel is coming along quickly now. Brian's giving me a birthday party on Saturday and we've both been finishing the details. Lighting was installed over the past week. We've just finished patching the ceiling and have the first coat of paint done. All that will be left after Saturday will be the tile behind the stove and sink. We'll probably procrastinate that for a few weeks. Marylu, I'm really sorry to hear about your husband. I remember you telling us about his fall. It's really too bad that it might come to surgery. I'll be thinking about you guys and waiting to hear back. Hey everyone! I've been looking at bulbs already. You should be too. It won't be long! Cheers, Steven
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I do not think it will start a war...just maybe dirty looks and cold shoulders. The funny thing is that the kids go to private school and the family walks past our house every Sunday to attend church services. You would think they are decent people.....but I feel like that is all a mask for the demons they are raising! On the 4th our town had fireworks at the park we usually go to. We walked since it is only a few blocks. On the way home they were in front of us walking. The bigger troublemaker of the two boys stopped to tie his shoe (I think so we would catch up). Well we passed the boys and their father (their mom did not go to fireworks-she does not work or anything?). When we got up to the street to cross there was lots of cars leaving the fireworks. They all rushed out in front of cars and crossed so we ended up behind them again. Well when we passed their house (it was almost 10pm) the dad had gone inside and left the two boys outside hanging out in the driveway! It was like he was asking for trouble.
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Comments (27)
Remember, the person you're tipping often shares tips with the back of house, and servers in some places pool tips entirely. It's worth weighing whether the service was bad enough to short the busboys and dishwashers, or store pickers vs. drivers. Yes, it's better where they pay the staff well, but I don't see it becoming standard here. Tipping was prevalent among the leisure class in Europe, centuries ago, when they would give tips to the servants for doing extra tasks, or personal errands. Tips were given to random people who were enlisted to hold horses. And to servers. It was a way for obnoxious rich people to get good service. Now, the way we do it, it's an expected compensation, and prices are artificially low because of that expectation. Yes, it would be better if it were just on the bill, and the people were well compensated, but there would also have to be a concomitant increase in listed prices. Americans hate that, even though it's just slight of hand. I remembered to check and increase the amount for my coming grocery order, making sure there was a good tip. I have a few non-food items coming from elsewhere and wish I could tip everyone along the delivery chain for bringing me things.
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pink_warm_mama_1
20 years ago
It is easier if one can believe that loved ones are in a better place. That sounds trite, but one must hang on to something, and keep praying. My heart goes out to anyone who suffers a loss.
lulie___wayne
20 years ago
I'm glad that you are feeling better, Nancy. Have you tried Compassionate Friends in your area? It is a wonderful group that can be so much help to parents who have lost children and also for the siblings. It was a life line for me when we first lost Christin and continues to be an organization which I support. Some of my best friends have been made through our chapter in Baton Rouge.
I hope that you can find a group which will give you comfort. Keep in touch.
Lu

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