Turkeytrott: There was a sentence in what I wrote that has been bothering me. It did not come out right and I want to re-word it, to express my thinking here. I wrote: "From what you have written, it sounds to be as if he is so bored, and unhappy, and yet he is still with you". I worded it wrong. What I am trying to say is that you are in a long term marriage. In a long term marriage, people can become bored by familiarity. The lack of newness. It does not necessarily mean that the people themselves are boring. It simply means while people may find comfort in the familiar, they can also become bored. It sounds to me as though you actually have a good marriage, as he says he is content, the snuggling, the kisses, but it sounds as though he is so restless, and yearning for new/different but could be staying because he knows what he has is good, and he doesn't trust himself enough, and fears that he may be totally blowing it and lose you in the process. I think of that song that sings about love... "You don't know what you've got till it's gone" and perhaps that is the fear that keeps him from really chasing after this elusive life he thinks is out there...somewhere. I think of the women that I have read about that have been unhappy in their marriage. Some had an affair and left their husband for the other man. We hear that once her ex-husband found a new love, and either married her or moved in with her, and her children started attaching to this new "mom figure" that she had serious regrets. Or her new marriage was not what she thought it would be and she realized the enormous mistake she had made. Perhaps you can talk to your husband and tell him you understand his restlessness. His boredom. His thoughts dancing with the possibilities of something/someone new. What can you two do that could shake some newness into this fragile time in your marriage as children go off to college and he sees the excitement in their eyes of youth, before reality like mortgages and responsibility weigh people down. And he yearns to feel like that again. Start with a great makeover. It will help you feel good about yourself, and he will see you in a new way. If you need to lose weight, do it. Whiten your teeth if they need it. It can take off years, and make your smile light up a room. Change your clothes style, and address your bedroom style, (bedding/drapes/paint color) to make it fresh and appealing. It will make you feel good every time you walk in your room, even if he leaves. I wish you and your children the best. Re-read my last post, and see if anything within helps in any way. Do not sit idle. If you can't get him interested, or if he has already left, start making the changes for yourself! Take a deep breath, and there are books on the market about women who have discovered gifts in the midst of the sorrow. I am sending a hug and encouragement your way. I wish you blessings in the midst of it all.

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Since they live near me I have been in on day one when they gave birth at Hershey Med. That week Kate who looked much different then with short brown hair, no make up, and a frumpy body said she needed a car when they all go out as a family. I thought..so buy one and don't ask for donations. She whined and whined in every interview about the expense and all the problems. She got volunteers and treated them like crap...never speaking to them and resenting their intrusion in her house. She left post -its everywhere and fired a nanny for washing her hands in the kitchen sink. Jon was very young when they married but has really helped her despite all the screaming at him by her. They lived in a modest house and needed to move so they did. And now they live in a McMansion on many acres.Third move in three years. She screams about the paparazzi but SHE asked for it. If she had not agreed to exploit her kids, she would not cause a single person to photograph her. Jon has hair plugs, Kate has teeth work including whitening, a tummy tuck, breast work ,her hair do which is the ugliest one I ever saw but she claims people every where want to know who does it, and free dental, haircuts, doctors visits, ski vacations renewal of marriage vows in Hawaii, appearance on Martha Stewart and all the shows..Limos picking then up to go to parks , Disney..and YET this is not enough. She writes w/ a ghost writer THREE books and goes on tours letting Jon take the kids. Why? If you want your picture taken with Kate it will cost you $75. Imagine. They canceled a conference here last week because no one wanted to pay the $45 ticket price.Her whole family is estranged from her..even her brother and SIL who helped a lot . When TLC wanted to reimburse them Kate screamed that only she would be paid. Mady takes right after Kate in personality and when the little ones aren't cute anymore but sullen 8 year old like the twins , Kate's glory days will be gone. I cannot stand her and sympathize totally with Jon.They get up to $75,000 an episode and have 40 a year. She thinks she's celebrity.

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