i too lost a loved one to suicide.. its very painful and shocking. He was showing signs of depression and I was already pregnant with our 1st child.. I too wasn't in a stable mood and I was also frustrated at how unloved I felt. before any intervention could happened, he leap to his death, total abandonment of a pregnant wife.... I dunno how to grieve this kind of death. I could have understand more if he was ill or it was an accident. but he choses death while I was pregnant with our first was a complete shock... I am still in shock and honestly for him to do this, I am not sure if I will remember him fondly. I wish I could but right now I am so very angry hurt and lost. and with those said friends too

I have been trying to help my husband. He hasn't shown any grief since the day he had to see his father's body at the funeral home. At the funeral he was the only dry-eyed person. I have been doing everything around the house, and anything I can think of to make things easier on him. But I am about ready to snap. NOt at him but at the insensitivity of other people. It is crazy. First, the my FIL's sister (in her 50's) posted an invite to his funeral on facebook. It was supposed to be a private family graveside service because my husband's mother is in a very fragile state right now. It was such a shock and she is not doing well. So two days before the funeral it is found out that his family now has to get together enough food to feed about 50 ppl because my FIL's sister invited all these people to the service and get together afterward. They did NOT need the extra stress of having to do this!! And a simple thing- my parents decided to send flowers my MIL's house even though they really don't know her. My mother asked ME to send them (because I could pick out something she'd like I guess) so I called a local florist and asked that the flowers be delivered to the house on the day of the funeral. The florist calls me back the day of the funeral to say they couldn't get the flowers I wanted in that day so they would be delivered the next day. I didn't want to argue so I said ok. There are more important things. But then I get another call that evening saying the flowers wouldnt' be delivered until TWO days after the funeral. I spoke with the owner who was VERY rude. When I said the flowers were for a funeral he corrected me and said "No they are not for a funeral, they are being delivered to a home address." Yes, dumbass but they have a sympathy card with them. He then asked what the address was even though I'd already given it to the person who took the order previously. He went on to say it wasn't his fault (I wasn't even upset at this point) that his supplier was late and all he could do was have me select another arrangement and he "Might" be able to deliver it by the next day. I found another florist and called him back and asked him to cancel the order. He said he'd already made arrangements to get the flowers I needed (still two days late) and I told him I just wanted to cancel the order please and he said whatever and hung up on me!! Stupid, but I just broke down crying. And at the service, the strangest thing was that my MIL did not want to watch her husband's urn be buried in the dirt (her kids and grandkids wanted to watch) and I definately don't blame her. She is still thinking of him as a person who is alive or has characteristics of being alive and to see that would just kill me. She started bawling and told everyone she had to get out of there and NOT one of her kids escorted her away. MY FIL's sister who posted the thing on facebook took her away. It also seems that my MIL does not want to hear any good things about her husband from anyone. SHe is very angry toward him (probably for leaving her alone) and if anything nice is said she gets mad. So I say nothing. I just don't know what to do.

Vickey, You have my sympathies on the loss of your mother. I think you'll find that you'll experience a wide variety of emotions during your period of grief. It's difficult to predict what they might be, how long they last or how intense they might be. Just be assured that most are within the realm of what is considered "normal". Lack of concentration is something I had to deal with after my Dad died. In my case it was primarily because I felt that mundane tasks were unimportant and I couldn't muster the will or the ambition to care much about them for some time. Eventually it passes. As far as feeling down "for no real reason", you will experience more of that. You may not think you have a reason, but just the absence of your Mom in your life and the void that leaves behind is enough reason to feel down. These feelings will come and go, without warning, and will vary in intensity. It's been 6 months since Dad died and I still have those days. Some will probably tell you that they still experience them years later. Don't worry about feeling down for no reason, just don't let it get the best of you. As for the whole jewelery thing, that's a tough one. I can certainly understand your feelings of resentment and anger. They are justified. By your description, your SIL's acted very inappropriately. Discuss it with your siblings to make sure your Mom didn't make any arrangements to dispose of these things that maybe you weren't aware of. Beyond that, I guess it depends on how strongly you feel about their actions. Confrontation at this time, over such issues can divide a family for a long time, but then again, keeping your anger and resentment inside isn't healthy either. Hopefully someone else will have good advice for you on how to deal with that. Good luck and may God's peace be with you.

My darling husband passed away 15 days ago. We knew each other for 8 years. He was very vibrant and full of life, had a good job house and car. Internally though he was suffering from chronic depression and was addicted to alcohol for many years even before i knew him. It got worse when he lost his mother 3 years ago. He would constantly talk about killing himself, praying that God would take his life. It was like seeing him die everyday. I prayed that he comes out of his depression, went to the psychiatrist to get meds for him, put him in rehab, gave him unconditional love but nothing seemed to work. He stopped eating and would just drink and watch the tv the whole day and night. Any attempt at communication was met with silence. He did not want to talk about anything. He gradually became so weak that he was bed ridden. I would coax him to eat or at least have some soup or juice but it was an uphill task. 3 years and 10 hospitalizations later he is no more. His body and organs were so weak that it could not process any medicines. I just wish that he would be alive today maybe he would have made an effort at living. People tell me that he is free from his worries and depression. I hope he is finally at peace. People say that your love was one sided but i know that he loved me and needed me. He would feel more depressed when i was not around him. I would call him my sunflower. In the end i feel he could not help himself. I miss my darling a lot.