Nine days ago, a teammate of mine, on the distance track and cross country team died. Practice is still really hard for me and I just am so upset. My coaches are really sad too, but I don't see how I'm going to get through this and my family doesn't understand at all, because they didn't run with her.
How awfull for you and your team. Did they bring in grief counselling for all of you? if not maybe you could find a counselor for yourself. When my boss died by his own hand the company had counsellors there in less than an hour and it was a great help. Gook luck and God Bless. I am so sorry.
Sometimes people who love us (like our family) have the misguided idea that by ignoring things they are helping us to not dwell on the loss, that by not speaking about it the pain will pass faster. All it does is make the person grieving feel worse, like they don't have any reason to feel so badly and that there is something wrong with their thoughts.
There's nothing wrong with how you feel. I hope you can find someone to help you get through this. Since your coaches are sad too, maybe you could talk to them, or maybe you could ask to speak to a guidance councellor at school. I hope you can find someone to talk to--it feels really lonely to have such sad thoughts and no one to listen to them.
mav63_2007
kms4me
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