Son's Wedding

21 years ago

My son Brian was killed in a car accident in October of 2000. Time, the love and support of family and friends and this forum have all helped tremendously with my journey of grief and healing.

My older son got engaged last January and is getting married May 20. I have been struggling with my emotions. Despite the excitement and happiness for Danny, my thoughts and heart ache for Brian, who should be best man.

I will be dancing to I Hope You Dance by LeeAnn Womack with Danny and can't imagine how I'm going to get through it with even a shred of dignity.

Has anyone else been in this situation and offer suggestions on how to handle it?

Sort by:Oldest

Comments (3)

Ina Plassa_travis
21 years ago
leave off the mascara, and cry, darling...

there won't be anyone there who doesn't feel the same way.
alisande
21 years ago
Chinacat's right, Diane. No one will expect dignity. But if it will help to have a less emotional song, maybe that's an idea for you.

My advice is to just make sure Danny knows how happy you are for him. Assure him that some of your tears are from joy, not just sorrow.

Susan
Related Discussions
Wedding Pants Suit
Q
Comments (23)
Katlan, Boscov's is my favorite store. Got the dress I wore to my granddaughter's wedding at Boscov's. It'd been $120 and I got it for around $80. It was cute, fit and the price was right. Can't beat Boscov's. Plus I'm out of state so there's no sales tax. P.S. They have great sales on their kitchen items, too! Do check out Boscov's, declansmom!
...See More
Am I wrong to not want to attend my step-son's wedding?
Q
Comments (74)
I’m so glad you found peace Southern Summer ! I know it’s not the way we all visualized our blended families to be, but we had no choice but to separate & RE-gain our marriage back. I know that feeling & I am so glad your husband realized what was happening & found his way back to your marriage as priority & backed you, his wife, his future. I’m so glad to have connected with other SM’s who get it. Have a great day & keep smiling, there is a great life out here for all of us !
...See More
Wedding quilt FINALLY finished!!!
Q
Comments (22)
Just wanted to share the couple opening the quilt. The wedding was in Utah at a state park - beautiful setting. They opened "family" gifts on Friday night before the wedding. The bride was in tears, the groom overwhelmed. They were staying in the yurt and put the quilt on the bed immediately - and invited EVERYONE (100+ people) to come and see it. Sean and Nicole opening the quilt. Nicole and Sean opening the pillow shams. The wedding kiss - what a beautiful spot for a wedding! Glad it is finished and delivered!!! Sue
...See More
Wedding toast - what to drink?
Q
Comments (26)
No Costco in my state but I might peruse Aldi. Don't know about their quality. I just got the paper cups in tonight for the toast. Hubs says drinking champagne out of paper cups is tacky but I am not doing plastic, no way. Initially I was going to buy glass and give them out as wedding favors but the costs of these two weddings are setting me back about 1/4 of my yearly salary already. So I guess this is one of those "conventional or not?" dilemmas.
...See More
lulie___wayne
21 years ago
Brian will be there for sure! I know that without a doubt. He will be happy for Danny and want you to focus on Danny's special day and to know that he is with all of you in spirit.
When a good friend of mine's son got married recently, she had the same feelings as you do. Her other son was murdered and she didn't know how in the world she would get through the wedding, reception etc.
Her son and his bride had candles on the alter with pictures of her son and his father who was also deceased. When my friend and her son were lighting her son's candle, a HUGE thunder bolt rattled the entire church. It happened the second that the fire hit the candle wick. EVERYONE in the church knew that it was Cory letting them know that he was present.
I agree with Susan as far as making sure that Danny knows how very happy that you are for him and his bride. Good luck!
Lu

Related Stories

COLOR Why My Son’s Room Will Be Red: An Expert Weighs In on Colors for Baby

By Jude Stewart

Historical facts, trend recaps and enthusiastic support for painting your nursery any darn color you like

Full Story

BEDROOMS Room of the Day: Childhood Bedroom Is Redone for Visiting Son

By Becky Harris

A couple’s adult son and his new wife now can stay in luxe personalized quarters when they’re in town

Full Story

WEDDINGS How One Couple Got a Perfectly Intimate Backyard Wedding

By Lauren Piasecki/Black Cherry Design

Vintage pieces, natural materials and close family and friends are an ideal combination for a Pittsburgh couple

Full Story

WEDDINGS Houzz Call: Show Us Your Backyard Wedding!

By Janet Paik

Did you say ‘I do’ at home? We want to hear and see everything about it. Share your photos and you could be featured in an upcoming ideabook

Full Story

SHOP HOUZZ Houzz Products: Great Wedding Gifts for Modern Couples

By Houzz

Give newlyweds a gift as memorable as the day itself, to have and to hold in a special place at home

Full Story

MY HOUZZ My Houzz: Farmhouse Style in a Virginia Bed-and-Breakfast

By User

A country home includes gorgeous grounds, whimsical spaces, a barn as a wedding venue and chandeliers throughout

Full Story

LIFE Tell Us: Do You Know How to Live With Your Parents?

By Becky Harris

If you've tried multigenerational living under one roof, we'd love to hear the details

Full Story

100

DECORATING GUIDES Houzz Call: What Home Collections Help You Feel Like a Kid Again?

By Mitchell Parker

Whether candy dispensers bring back sweet memories or toys take you back to childhood, we'd like to see your youthful collections

Full Story

MATERIALS Are You a Maker? Show Us Your Favorite Tool or Material

By Annie Thornton

Houzz Call: A tool or material can be a maker’s best friend. We’d like to see your favorite — and what it helps you achieve

Full Story

206

ARCHITECTURE Houzz Call: Show Us Your Logo!

By Annie Thornton

A picture is worth a thousand words, but your company’s symbol may be worth its weight in gold. We’d like to hear the graphic details

Full Story

129

Son's Wedding

Comments (3)

Ina Plassa_travis

alisande

Related Discussions

lulie___wayne

COMPANY

BUSINESS SERVICES

GET HELP

CONNECT WITH US