life regrets

15 years ago

Hey guys,

In the course of my life so far IÂve come across plenty of people with regrets theyÂve had in their own lives. And seeing how life is so incredibly shortÂ I just kind of wanted to see what everyone elseÂs regrets are.

Career-life objectives?

Relationships?

Family?

It would be pretty cool to learn from each otherÂs *mistakes* or to see what we would do differently at your age. So I guess when you postÂ itÂll be cool if you posted your age along with your posting.

I know a lot of people out there also try to live without regrets... and even if you do, it'd be helpful to see something you'd change.. rather than regret.

HereÂs mine:

I regret not spending enough time to keep in touch and to foster relationships with the significant people in my life. I feel like IÂve been too distracted with the other aspects of life (work and school primarily) that I just kinda lost touch with people I would rather not have lost touch withÂ I know its not too late.. but I feel like some relationships have deteriorated too much for full repair..

Age:22

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Comments (7)

stargazzer
15 years ago
I regret getting married and having a family. I think I would have preferred a career instead of a family. But then you always want what you don't have. I don't spend much time thinking of things I can't change. I am to busy enjoying the time I have left.
kms4me
15 years ago
I love my son, and his child, beyond belief. I would never wish either of their existences away. But I do wish I had not been an unwed teenage mom.
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Oakley, just my 2 cents worth, but it sounds like you need to get out and about too. Roseabbey - I can imagine retiring being a big life change. I work part-time and am considering reducing my hours again, but am not ready to think about leaving work. As much as I love my home time, I need a bit more stimulation and interaction with others. I am only 48 and feel like I want to keep working for a few more years. I get so much from volunteering and feel like this is something I NEED to do, that I am sure once I do retire, I will do more of that. It sounds like you have alot of positives in your life. I do not see you as someone sitting around the house, in front of the tv, not doing much. I do understand about needing a purpose. Sounds like you just need to find some new *purposes* LOL. Sometimes all we need to do is get out of that rut, and change things up. Meet a friend for lunch, get outside and enjoy this beautiful weather (hopefully you are getting it too!), find something you can get involved in that is important to YOU. You'll be feeling better in no time at all! PS - I love the chemo buddy idea. Have never heard of that here. It would take a special person to do that, but what a neat idea.
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Thank you golddust. My dad loved facebook. He loved posting old pics on there and reminiscing and being nostalgic. His services were yesterday. It was standing room only. He was loved by many people. It was really touching to see just how many, although it was a long exhausting day and it's now pretty much just a blur. My Dad has always been there when I needed him for pretty much anything. It is going to be tough not to be able to just pick up the phone and call him. Or even worse, the sad reality of him not being here for our next big family party in August. There will definitely be a huge void. In my heart of hearts, I know he is ok. I'm not extremely religious but I firmly believe in God and what he holds for us after we pass from this life. I have received many signs since his passing, and I have not even looked for any. I just have so many unanswered questions regarding his estate and he did not have a will. So unfortunately, I have a long road ahead with the estate. He was part owner of a business in which the partner stopped paying him profits and he had started litigation against the partner. He was also involved in suing my grandfather's partner for his estate because the partner had forged a check and wiped my grandfather's accounts clean while he was ill. I'm sure the stress of it all contributed to his sudden death. He was devastated to have been betrayed by both of them. Not looking forward to any of it, but I will right the wrongs that were brought against him. The moral: If you don't have a will, get one now. Life is fragile and it could end any second, it's a great mystery and we just never know when our time is up.
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tuscanlover - Thanks for the kind words. I wish your daughter the best with her 6 year old. They are learning so much today about Autism and how to work with it in the schools. It is so much better now then it was when my son was a student and they didn't know what the heck was wrong with him. And the general public is more aware and less likely to stare or make rude comments like they use to (though some people will never learn). I am sorry to hear about your move and the loss of your and DH's job, house and all. That is really tough to face at 55. My dad went through a similar thing when he was in his late 40's. In 1961 he was transferred by his company from Mass. to Illinois. He moved the whole family, bought a new house and less then a year later they closed that division. It was a very tough time for everyone. My mom missed her family terribly and we almost moved back to Mass. But then my dad changed careers completely and became a stock broker and made more money then he ever would have at his old job. He left my mother very well off when he died in 1987. And she still is very well taken care of by what he left behind. So when I see the grey clouds, I try to find the silver lining. As to whether I am still sane or not, my DH might debate you on that fact. ;>) Clare
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Somewhat sorry that I did such a poor job of letting my ex- (several years deceased) know how important she was to me ... how much I loved her. My dad's family were somewhat undemonstrative, and he was an only child ... who said once, some years after Mom got sick and his mother came to live with us, that her ideas about raising kids were 20 years out of date when she raised him. Mom became hospitalized with mental illness when I was past six, and died when I was 13, 2 brothers younger. Her family are more demonstrative ("the kissin' XXXs") ... and I think that our family life would have been different has she been with us dthrough our growing up years. Another regret - that son says that there is no god - that all religions are merely superstitions and is rather militant about it. I have to understand that his choice of lifestyle is his to choose, and accept that. A third is that I didn't get to operate as a clergyperson through all the years of one's career, and Sue's and my parting ove 40 years ago, when clergy just didn't DO that, was not the whole of it. That should be about enough for one day, dontcha think? ole joyful
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User
15 years ago
I'm 61 and I don't really have any regrets. I'm having a great time. I have three wonderful kids, two married to great husbands, the third one engaged; and two grandchildren that are the love of my life. I have a job I'm good at, a home in a great neighborhood with wonderful neighbors, and no husband to clutter up my life any more.

I've wondered, sometimes, about making different choices, but I look at my kids and I wouldn't trade the life I have had, good and not so good times, for anything in the world.
patly
15 years ago
I wish that I could exchange my 45+ year old adult daughter for another .
She is narcissistic and training her little son ( our only adored grandson) to be a puppet for her political viewpoint, even tho he is just 6 years old.
Almost everything she says is about her political beliefs and our dear gs will bring up issues he couldn't possibly understand on any level.
Her politics have evolved into a religion that she expounds upon every time we see her.
Nothing we say, stops her, it only leads to nasty exchanges from her to us.
Ugh.
phoggie
15 years ago
At the age of 67, my health is not doing very well. I know that arthritis is a lot in the genes, but I wish I had taken better care of my joints in my younger years. I wore those 3" heels every day to work....did a lot of "line-dancing" etc....and that is so hard on the joints....but enjoyed it at the time.....now I have had a hip replaced, back surgery coming up soon, followed by two knee replacements. With my not being able to exercise, my weight has increased to the point that I am depressed and that is a vicious circle....depression, eating, fat, hurting, and repeat over and over. I sure do wish I had taken better care of myself when I had time.
cheerful1_gw
11 years ago
I have many regrets, the biggest one being many years ago I told a lie to my husband before we were married. I was only a teenager, and judged that he would be upset about it if I told him. He found out and was very angry. We almost broke up; his father told him to give me another chance. We eventually did get married, but he never hesitates to bring it up when we have an argument. He still calls me a liar and judgmental.

Second regret, if I were more mature then, I never would have gotten married.
cheerful1_gw
11 years ago
Oops, just realized this was a grandparents forum. I had done a search for "life regrets", and saw this thread without checking which forum it was in.

No children/grandchildren in my life (another regret?)

life regrets

Comments (7)

stargazzer

kms4me

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patly

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