thank you, mav, and wishing you a peaceful new year!

i am forging ahead, just beginning year #5. i cannot say it has gotten any easier but, at this point it is a "different" kind of grief. still have not reached acceptance and i am not sure i ever will but i have reached a point where i know i must at least try to find some happiness in the little things and be thankful for the memories i have.

i keep telling myself that the love gary and i shared for 12 years is something i have to be thankful for because i DID have it and while it was taken away from me much too soon, it was the best part of my life and always will be. :)

I nod in agreement, we should look forward in the New Year for Happiness and not look back in constant sorrow.

It was tough this year, having lost my Brother this year, too and my Dad being gone as well. Dad kept the family together during rough times.

It is a stark reality that our Loved ones are gone although our hope is in seeing them again when our time comes.

I kept getting flashes of memories of Christmas' past as I went along with the holiday preparations and family gathering. At times, tears would spring to my eyes. I could actually feel the memories (voices, essence, glasses tinkling at the Holiday table) swirling around me...... It hurt, but felt that they really never do leave you.

I Love them. I always will. I still can hear their voices & see them in my mind cyrstal clear, just like they are still alive.

Maybe we need a little reminder that we own our own Happiness. No point in wasting our lives being miserable. There are other people in our lives. They need us to give them good and Happy memories to think about when it is our time to leave here. They are counting on us!

Take care everyone and forge ahead.