Financial arrangement when parents move in?
MagdalenaLee
9 years ago
Featured Answer
Sort by:Oldest
Comments (10)
rosefolly
9 years agomaifleur01
9 years agoRelated Discussions
9 Great Rules for Caring for Your Elderly Parent at Home
Comments (7)FallDownGoBump... I hear ya... Loud and clear... Sounds as if we're both in the same boat... Hubby has 3 sisters and 2 brothers left and not one of them even bothered to send a card or call on his birthday, let alone any other time. Even if I did ask for help not one of them would... But the real kicker is that hubby has helped EVERYONE in his family and everyone has screwed him in some way... Six of his nine siblings and his father has lived with us at one time or another... When we first married we took in his father and youngest sister with the stipulation that 4 of the other brothers and sisters chip in a lousy $7. a week... The first week we got $21. the next week we got $14. then not another cent or even a crust of bread... I could go on for hours about them but I won't... It only upsets me more... My story: Three years ago hubby broke his hip and two days after the surgery they sent him home with me with no additional help... Three days after that something happened and he didn't know who he was, where he was or who I was... After a two week stay in the hospital, so they could perform every test known to man, they told me he had 2 strokes and a little stiff from the partial hip replacement but otherwise he was in good health and they sent him to a rehab facility ( nursing home )... BTW, while he was there, recovering, his youngest sister got it in her head that since the nursing home offered hospice services that was all they did and turned around and told hubby that's why he was there! Sorry for getting off on another rant... Anyway, after two months the rehab facility sent him home... For about a month and a half the visiting nurse and a physical therapist came over twice a week... By then I had to find a doctor because hubby's meds were running out. After reviewing all his medical records the doctor says hubby had SEVERAL strokes and a heart attack!!!! Ok, sorry, that's yet another rant... Right now I have a 67 year old hubby who moves as if he's 100 and, at times, has the brain of a 2 year old... Hugs, Rita...See MoreTell me your thoughts on: When a Parent KNOWS they have Alzheimer
Comments (26)With the "privacy laws" lots has changed! And, lets not forget the ungrateful idiots that have wiped out their parents savings with POA's. That is what has caused so many changes. I am getting through all this and am very lucky my dad can still sign. Most of the money is in his name so I can get it out to pay mom's nursing home bills, but it has been a challenge! I now have it all worked out so should not have too many more hassles. Our investment guy told me today that I am not the only one complaining about the mountain of paperwork that needs to be done to take care of parents! LOL! Some thing our attorney adviced me to do also was to change the primary benificiary on my dad's IRA's. That way if, heaven forbid, some thing happens to him the remainder of the money will not go to the nursing home for my mom's care. Makes sense and that way I will have a few pennies to take care of my brother and his special wants. Oh, that is some thing else, we also have it set up in the will that when my parents are gone my brothers share will go in to a trust for him, therefore keeping it out of the hands of the nursing home....See MoreSo when you are ready to move to your new home...
Comments (18)I second getting the floors done before you move in. I wish we had done that in our tv room. The carpeting is 10 year old builder's grade stuff with a couple stains on it. We didn't care when we bought because we knew we'd be upgrading the carpet in a couple years once are kids are less likely to spill stuff on it. Well, now we have a HUGE entertainment center with a projection tv in that room, and there's no WAY that thing will be moving anytime soon. Which means no redoing that carpet until we move out of the house. Fortunately, we can recarpet the stairs and second floor (which is that same 10 year old builder's grade), and figure we'll just give a carpet allowance for the TV room to the buyers we sell to in the future. As for paint, I recommend waiting until you are in the house. In our old house, we lived with the nasty wallpaper until we decided what we wanted to do in each room, and then we tackled stripping the wallpaper and painting. We did a room every few months until it was all done....See MoreMove vs Remodel Decision - when inventory is low
Comments (35)Congratulations on your decision! It's a tough one and there are so many factors to consider. Time you plan on staying in the house is crucial. Also in our area, one major consideration is property taxes. If we were to raze our house and start from scratch we'd be assessed at current house values - more than doubling our current annual payment. That said, if you are not careful with your remodel and your project turns into a "might-as-well project", you will regret having not razed the house. We bought our first house almost 18 years ago and 12 years ago we did our first project adding a master bedroom suite. Costs got way out of control as we were both working crazy hours and just left everything to an expensive (but reliable) contractor. For example, the contractor billed us for the hour it took to pick up the light fixtures at a local store because I couldn't make it there before it closed. When I look at what we spent on that project (including the ridiculous architect fees) it made absolutely NO sense and we were silly to not have built from scratch despite like our neighbors did (although still we probably couldn't have afforded it). Fast forward 12 years - Fortunately, we didn't need to sell the house and our neighborhood grew and home values sky-rocketed and miraculously remained fairly stable during the housing burst. That master bed/bath has been thoroughly enjoyed and our house has appreciated far more than we ever expected so we are by no means at a loss and we preserved our tax base unlike our neighbors who built new. We are now going to update the last part of the house (a new kitchen/family room and guest room). We very carefully considered all the numbers and if we are careful (unlike last time) to control costs then it makes complete sense to remodel rather than rebuild. Of course, I'd love to build a shiny new energy efficient house on our lot, but it's still way out of budget and buying the equivalent of what we will have after the remodel in our market is simply unaffordable. If I look at what we've spent on the house over the 18 years it will total a little less than what we could build it for new now, but we have enjoyed it for 18 years and did it on the timeline that we could afford, in a neighborhood that we love and that our kids really enjoy....See MorePhoneLady
9 years agomarie_ndcal
9 years agoPhoneLady
9 years agoElmer J Fudd
9 years agoMagdalenaLee
9 years agoElmer J Fudd
9 years agoemma
9 years ago
Related Stories
MOST POPULARWhen Does a House Become a Home?
Getting settled can take more than arranging all your stuff. Discover how to make a real connection with where you live
Full StoryMOVINGRelocating Help: 8 Tips for a Happier Long-Distance Move
Trash bags, houseplants and a good cry all have their role when it comes to this major life change
Full StoryCONTRACTOR TIPSBuilding Permits: When a Permit Is Required and When It's Not
In this article, the first in a series exploring permit processes and requirements, learn why and when you might need one
Full StoryWORKING WITH PROSGo Beyond the Basics When Interviewing Architects
Before you invest all that money and time, make sure you and your architect are well matched beyond the obvious levels
Full StoryDECORATING GUIDESHow to Decorate When You're Starting Out or Starting Over
No need to feel overwhelmed. Our step-by-step decorating guide can help you put together a home look you'll love
Full StorySELLING YOUR HOUSEA Moving Diary: Lessons From Selling My Home
After 79 days of home cleaning, staging and — at last — selling, a mom comes away with a top must-do for her next abode
Full StoryMOVINGThe All-in-One-Place Guide to Selling Your Home and Moving
Stay organized with this advice on what to do when you change homes
Full StorySELLING YOUR HOUSE15 Questions to Ask When Interviewing a Real Estate Agent
Here’s what you should find out before selecting an agent to sell your home
Full StoryLIFETell Us: Do You Know How to Live With Your Parents?
If you've tried multigenerational living under one roof, we'd love to hear the details
Full StoryENTERTAININGModern Manners: Smooth Moves for Kids' Visits
For hosting kids or visiting with Junior in tow, we give you a plan to keep stress levels low and fun levels high
Full StoryMore Discussions
jakkom