skip to main content

Bringing a dish to a party dilemma

21 years ago

A friend of mine brought a dish to a pot luck; she didn't have much time to do much, just threw together bagged iceberg salad, some cherry tomatoes, and some croutons. No one touched it, and someone made comments about how dumpy it was. What do you think?

Sort by:Oldest

Comments (14)

duckie
21 years ago
I think the person with the snide comment was rude. It is especially hard if (as is often the case with potlucks) the potluck was with friends or a close group working on a common goal.

Perhaps if your friend had been able to grab a couple bottles of salad dressing or made the salad at the salad bar at the grocery store with more toppings, she may have had more takers.

I am wierd when it comes to salad. I really want it to have it's own plate. Had I been at the potluck, I probably wouldn't have taken any salad because there probably wasn't salad plates.
good36
21 years ago
I love it when people bring plain lettuce salad. The group we entertain eats most of it. The person who made that comment was very rude!
Related Discussions
Being told what to bring to a party
Q
Comments (28)
Interesting thread! I don't mind being told what to bring but in my group of friends, it's pretty much understood that we'll bring something when invited. I'm also one who means it when I say Don't bring anything, so when someone tells me not to bring anything, I don't. But when someone tells me what to bring, I prefer it to be a category, such as appetizer or dessert. Then I can decide what I want to make. Unless they are specifically requesting a particular dish I've made before and want me to make again, which is fine too. But recently I was invited to a party and asked, what can I bring? and they told me a specific thing. Now the reason I didn't like that is because it was something that didn't require cooking, and I'm known in my circles as someone who cooks and I usually get compliments on whatever I make. This was a party where there would be several of my regular circle of friends in addition to a lot of people I don't know (or know very well). I did bring what they wanted, thinking that they probably had a set menu in mind, and this was the exact thing they needed to fill the bill. Well it turned out that it was a huge party, lots and lots o' food, no matter what I brought it would have been fine so the specific thing they requested was not specifically needed and I would have been happier bringing something I'd figured out on my own. No biggie really but I wondered if they weren't used to people asking WHAT to bring, and didn't really get that the best answer would have been a category instead of being so specific. I do believe most everyone just brought whatever they wanted because there was a pretty big overabundance of desserts, which, IME, is what you get when people decide what to bring without at least some guidance. Anyway, this party is an annual event, we went again this year and when I RSVP'd I just said, I'll bring an appetizer & wine, and left it at that. Easiest all around. It's a fun party and the savory food gets eaten as if locusts have descended and desserts are overflowing.
...See More
Please help - asked to bring a side dish to fit with a game theme
Q
Comments (2)
Red Card (soccer)--grilled sliced tomatoes Yellow Card--grilled sliced yellow tomatoes Referree--zucchini casserole with stripes of white and black sesame seeds on top Checkers--squares of root vegetables baked with carrot and parsnip circles on top Tiddlywinks--rounds of mixed vegetables (easy because you can use all different sizes) Pick Up Sticks--batons of raw veggies, with dip Jenga--tower of rectangular cut veggies. Use bamboo skewers to hold them in place until the last minute Five for Fighting (hockey)--any salad with a vinaigrette dressing (oil and vinegar don't mix :) ) Four No Trump (bridge)--a four layer dip with each corner done in a different order so that all layers are represented on top. Double Eagle (golf)--vegetable pate en croute shaped like a double eagle Hole in One--deviled eggs Sand Trap--nuts, grapes and other goodies in a bed of ground toasted almonds High Fly Ball (baseball)--souffle Ping Pong--melon balls Life (board game)--kale salad with goji berries and olive oil dressing Slap (card game)--carrots marinated with jalapenos and vinegar Shoot the Moon (Hearts card game)--baked brie (though cheese is superfluous) I think green salad is what goes best with pizza. Just use a lot of frisee and call it Astroturf. :)
...See More
The dish they people want you to bring...
Q
Comments (37)
Every Wednesday our local paper has a column by a great cook in which she shares 2 or 3 recipes. I always make and take one of her most current dishes. They have always been a success. And it sends many ladies scurrying home to try to locate their old newspapers.
...See More
Side dishes for hamburger/hot dog street party
Q
Comments (34)
Thanks, Islay! I think I will try the Cake Provençal, but I have to buy some canned tuna, as I do not keep that on hand. Since you use a silicon pan, I think Pyrex would be fine. I was considering an 8x8" pan because I thought it might make more cubes, but I will make that determination when I see how much batter I end up with. I found another recipe for it here, but it uses ham, and I would rather use tuna. I think ham would make it crumbly. Here is another similar recipe that looks interesting. I made the Roquefort mini-popovers yesterday, and I determined that they will not be that good cold. They were fine when hot or warm but are a bit too eggy to eat cold - the texture would be off. I also learned that you absolutely must use a non-stick mini-muffin pan. I have an old one that I used, and I had bought a new one (which is non-stick) because the recipe calls for two pans of 12. I almost bought two new pans, which is what I should have done, as I will now be recycling my old pan, since the popovers got completely stuck in the old pan, even though it was properly oiled. I had to scoop the popovers out with a spoon from the old pan, but they fell right out of the new pan. I took pictures, but they are not pretty. It is very easy to eat six of these popovers, and we had twelve each last night, more or less as a main course. They are a bit like cheesy eggy waffles - more like a breakfast food, but still good as an appetizer. I would make them for a party at home but not to take out. I might also still make hush puppies, as they are like cornbread and will be okay cold.
...See More
prairie_rose
21 years ago
I would sure like to know what the rude person does with their time. If you have the day off, or don't work, then you have all the time in the world to cook and prepare. But if you work, have a family, have to drive kids, walk the dog and do some laundry before you leave, maybe salad is a pretty good dish.

I love iceberg lettuce on its own, I would have had some, and even if I did not I sure as heck would have kept my comments to myself. For crying out loud, its pot luck, it's not like there was not something else to eat.

Rose
colleenoz
21 years ago
I probably would have eaten some of the salad - I generally do that when I see something at a potluck that hasn't been touched. I agree that the rude comment was uncalled for- and the sort of thing often done by the person who didn't bring anything :-(
User
21 years ago
No one should judge what another brings to a pot luck, everyone has different abilities and resouces.

No matter what someone may think it is extremely rude and hurtful to make comments like that. It would be upsetting enough that no one ate it.
nancylouise5me
21 years ago
The comments about the salad were snide and uncalled for, should have kept them to themselves. But if your friend did as you said and just "threw" a few ingredients together with little thought I can see why it got the comments. If she doesn't have much time she could have used that same money she paid to purchase the ingredients and arranged to have a nice salad made up at the deli/grocery store. It's all in the presentation. If it looks like it was a last minute after thought than that is probably how people will react to it. NancyLouise
lindac
21 years ago
Depends on a lot of circunstances...I know people who would always do the minimum when a group at work would decide to have a pot luck...
But there's no accounting for tastes.
I was in charge of a mother, daughter, grand daughter tea as a fundraiser. I asked others in the organization to contribute either cookies, bars or tea sandwiches. I got some wonderful stuff....sandwiches decorated with edible flowers....wonderful tiny tarts....and one woman brought a big bag of those wafer cookies....the kind with white frosting in the middle and they come in white or in pink. I thought what a lazy thing to do!! But all the little girls Looooved them and they were all eaten....while I had other things left over.
I have gone to a pot luck when I know there will be small kids and taken Kraft dinner and cooked hot dogs.....
You just never know what will prove popular.
Linda C
SAG1
Original Author
21 years ago
an update
the hostess of the party called my friend and said next time dont bring anything!
User
21 years ago
Well that is without a doubt the rudest thing I have ever heard! Either there is more to this story than meets the eye or the hostess ......I use the term very loosely ....is totally without style or class! She's one to talk ...NOT!
cookingrvc
21 years ago
Ditto Sharon. Comments were rude and insensitive.

Sue
colleenoz
21 years ago
Well, if the hostess would be so rude, I wouldn't bother even to bring myself to any other party she might hold. What a mean thing to do!
duckie
21 years ago
It could be the hostess was trying to be nice. It isn't clear that she was the one with the rude comment in the beginning. Most potlucks have at least twice as much food as is necessary. If the hostess noticed that it was apparent the friend didn't have the time or inclination to do up a dish "big" and that her feelings were hurt when people didn't appreciate what she was able to do, the hostess just might be trying to say "I really want you to come to the next potluck, but don't sweat bringing a dish if it isn't convienient." Remember, hostess says something to "friend" who tells it to SAG1 who tells it to us. Kind of like that children's game telephone.
nhsuzanne
21 years ago
There is never an excuse for bad manners and rude comments.
Gee, it was pot luck, not tea with the queen! Good manners don't cost a dime!
minnie_tx
21 years ago
My DIL goes to the Deli and buys lots of Potato Salad and then gets a nice disposable platter for it and that is what she brings.

Related Stories

PRODUCT PICKS Guest Picks: Dishes and Tea Towels That Bring a Smile

By Trina McNeilly

Eat your heart out with kitchen accessories that put the "fun" in "functional"

TASTEMAKERS ‘The Intern’: Nancy Meyers on Bringing Movie Interiors to Life

The director of ‘Something’s Gotta Give’ and ‘It’s Complicated’ dishes on how she creates rooms for her characters

DINING ROOMS Design Dilemma: My Dining Room Needs Revamping!

By Becky Harris

Watch a dining-room makeover unfold in the Houzz Questions forum

CONTAINER GARDENS Solve Your Garden Border Dilemmas With Planted Pots

Set your containers free from the patio — placed among plantings in the ground, they fill unsightly gaps, let you experiment and more

KITCHEN DESIGN Designer's Touch: 10 Butler's Pantries That Bring It

By The Inman Company

Help your butler's pantry deliver in fine form with well-designed storage, lighting and wall treatments

NEUTRAL COLORS How to Bring Beige Walls to Life

By Laura Gaskill

Go for sprightly instead of snoozy by pairing beige walls with higher-octane hues

ART Bring In a View Like You’ve Never Imagined

By Matthew Ankeny

See how art photographers turn a plain white wall into a magical window with a centuries-old camera technique — and how you could try it too

KITCHEN DESIGN 10 Reasons to Bring Back the Humble Kitchen Table

OUTDOOR ACCESSORIES 10 Fountains to Bring Your Garden to Life

By Laura Gaskill

Water elements can be a dynamic focal point in your outdoor room

BUDGET DECORATING Budget Decorator: 16 Ways to Bring Summer Into Your Kitchen

By Laura Gaskill

Give your kitchen an easy-breezy feel by swapping in summery colors and natural accessories, and stowing cool-weather cooking stuff

Sponsored

More Discussions

Appetizers on a stick?

7