The very first thing to do is to see your doctor to rule out any medical problems. Then, get started.

You have to start small, and remember that any exercise is better than none. Walk one block and back five times a day, or around the block, or around two blocks. You get the idea.

Or join a gym. I swear by going to a gym. It's a time I set aside to exercise, and having the other people there is an encouragement. At the YMCA where I go, there are people of all ages and sizes - virtually none in spandex.

As for food, I can only talk about the things that work for me. Don't keep snack food in the house, be it ice cream or chips and salsa. Force yourself to get up and go out to get this, and often you won't. If you do, buy the smallest package they offer, because you'll probably eat it all.

I concentrate on things that are good for me rather than those that are bad. Rather than saying, "No chocolate today," I plan my seven servings of fruit and vegetables, whole grains, etc., and often I don't eat any junk. If I do, I revert to my first rule, getting the smallest bit I can buy individually.

I also swear by cooking ahead. Baked chicken, meatloaf, beef stew, whatever in single serving ziplock bags in the freezer. Makes it much less likely that I'll head out for fast food.

I know the rules about never eating in front of the television (or computer) and always sitting down at a table with food on a plate to eat. I must admit that I'm not very good at this, though I'm getting better. If I do eat while watching TV or the computer, I put a moderate serving on a plate and eat from that, rather than taking the whole box or bag. It's far too easy to eat a whole bag of something without even noticing.

Good luck. I notice that you're a recent widow. I'm sorry to hear that.