Since I have worked like crazy from day 1, and havent had much time to post, I guess I should fill in what I didnt on my post Monday morning-- I was hired on November 8 to fill a newly created position in the accounting department. It was the position of Accountant/Supervisor, and I was told that a 4-year degree was needed for this position. I was also told that I would learn the 5 audits that the department performs, as well as any other additional accounting functions that were needed. I was not given a deadline in which to have finished my training. During the last 2 weeks of November, I was taught one audit, and in December, I was sent to supervisor training, and then my direct supervisor, "H" re-certified as a supervisor me on December 28th and wrote on my evaluation "Good Job!!". I also started learning the slot audit about during the first/second week in Dec. And that is where I stayed until. On or about January 4, "H" called me into her office to say that from the reports she was hearing, that I was "burnt-out" (wtf???) on the slot machine audit, and that I was being put on another audit on January 8. When I asked what the problem was, she replied that she had received reports that I was stressed out. The only slot auditor for the week in question (December 25 to December 29; that supposedly burnt me out; it was also the busiest week at the property) was "R", who at one point told me to "stop f*cking things up", among other various job-misleading "help" she gave me while she was "training" me. I was told previously that she ("R) was very angry with me coming on board as she thought she should get the new position, even though she does not have the required degree. She ("R") was hostile to me while training, uncooperative and very demeaning to me and my background. She refused to help me on more than one occasion when I had problems with the audit, and would have a negative attitude when I asked for advice. And no, she wasnt too busy with her work to help-- I went to the other audit, and have been there ever since. "H" called me into her office on Sunday, January 22, told me that my position was eliminated because I wasnt trained enough to supervise the office for the week of January 23 27 (since the other supervisors were in training that week), and that I had had problems with that week in the slot audit. (Seems to be a re-occurring theme.) At this point, told her that I had never been given any specific guidelines as to when my training was to be finished, and this was the first I had heard that the other supervisors were to gone from the office that week. Then, I spoke up, and finally told her the conflicts with "R", and some of the things she said to me, and that she deliberately tried to teach me wrong procedures concerning the slot audit. (I learned about the wrong procedure from the other slot auditor when she came back to work, and I asked the correct procedures.) I also pointed out that I was never given a timeline that I was to know the whole department, and that she, "H", was my supervisor, and had failed to inform me of this. "H"then kept repeating that that week in the slots was bad (see, keeps re-occurring), and that I was being demoted to this other position, with a 50% reduction on pay (and I now became hourly; I was salaried before) and that my off days would be changed to reflect my new status. She also asked me not to say anything to the rest of the department until next week. (I assume the week starting January 29.) On Tuesday, January 23, I was sorting paperwork at the printer, and "H" apparently did not see me standing there, and I over-heard her, speaking in a low voice, tell "R"that my supervisor position was open, and she should go apply for it. No one else in the accounting department knew, as they might have a degree and be qualified for the position, but "H" did not choose to share that information with anyone other then "R", who has been sabotaging me since she had the chance in December. So, at this point, I figured that since it was, ahem.. public knowledge at this pointhey"H" told "R"and I let it slip at lunch to the others. Everyone was shocked, as I get along with them, and have helped out with their problems before. And, I figured that it was best to hear it from me, so that I dont look like a whipped pup. One of the guys that reported to me went back to the department and let it slip that he found out, and "R"s face was pricelessshe got defensive and her voice got high. It was funny to see and hear. He said that he overheard "H" tell "R", and she immediately started to backpedal. I did go to HR, and register my complaints, and the rep asked what I thought the repercussions would be, and I told her that I figured Id be fired, and she said "Well see about that", and smiled. Throughout all of this, I have kept my composure, and have smiled and not acted any different. I still talk and laugh and cut up, and I have kept the same level of work standards that I have from the first day. I finished one audit by 10am yesterday, the second by 4, and still and time to deal with other peoples problems with their work. So, I am still employed, but I think things will change on Sunday. And probably not for the better. Oh well. Its just a job that paid very well; its not my life and it does not define me. I did tell Rog on Monday, after I took a good assessment of things, and he is OK with things, no matter what happens. I told him everything, and I told him the reason that I could not tell him Sunday was that I couldnt bear the look of disappointment in his eyes, he told me I was silly, and that I couldnt disappoint him, ever. BJI love you, my sisnothing you can say to me would ever hurt me, b/c I know you speak from your heart. If I were hourly, I would say you are right, but I was salaried, and all supervisors must stay until all the work is finished, even if they themselves have been done for hours. And I was told that everyone must help the others out to finish up, which is fine with meso, thats why I would always ask, when I was finished, if I could help with someone elses work. (Although, in retrospect, I never did see any of the other supervisors do thatever. ???) My insurance will not kick in until Marcha long way to go--, and I was not given any type of review until this past Sunday. Nor any sense of unfilled expectations on anyones partI was told by one of me peers that I was going a very good job And as for the "down with" statement, I merely meant that I was now down in the pit with themnot a put down (LOL!) in anywaythey are great people! J The coatit is a Burberry, and it came form a consignment store with a no-return policy. (I rarely buy anything from a mall.) Still, even for that price, I wouldnt have bought it now. Its so gorgeousI feel like a million bucks with it onJJJ And---about the attitudeyoure right, and thats exactly what Ive been doing all week. Im still the same person I was this time last week, and Ill be that same person this time next week. While I hate being in this position, it is just a job, and it does not define me anymore than my MIL does. So, Im disappointed, but Ill liveits OK, and Ill just start over again Enough of me Patti(((((hugs))))) to you and your friendI can not imagine that pain NHSuzannegreat pics! JJ Marcithanks for the birthday exchange! Gotta goRog will be home in a bit Love and hugs to all Maddie

Good morning everyone! Patti - I'm not as bad as you are with my sleep. Last night I cheated and took an allergy medication because it usually makes me so drowsy for the first couple of hours. It was enough to get me to sleep. I'm relearning to sleep, somewhat. I have had to take naps now which have been helping. Normally I never nap because of irregular sleeping. We do what we can. What does your doctor say for your insomnia? CONGRATULATIONS on your loss! You go girl! Milkdud - Isn't it wonderful looking at the world 'anew' again with Aubrie? She sounds wonderful. Do what you can with your eating but don't sweat it, just carry on after she goes home. Enjoy your time together. Wish I were a fly on your wall! LOL Wodka the fact you are holding your own on the scale is fantastic with the company. I'm with ya because I experience the same each time we visit the in-laws every month. Drinks, nibble bowls of nuts and chips - very hard. Sometimes I have to 'plan' those visits by bulking up on more veggie/fruits, less carbs a day before and after the visit to allow myself a few extras while there. The key to that was 'planning'. It's much harder when you have a visiting situation that goes on for a couple of weeks. So pat yourself on the back for holding your own! You are doing great! I'll be thinking about you when I working downtown today - I know you will be happy to get outside again! Nhsuzanne - how is your flush going? Mine helped a lot to refocus and remind myself how little fruit and veg I've been eating! I get lazy. Marci glad to see you post! I hope you'll post a pic when the kitchen is done. Happy 4th of July to my neighbours! Have a safe holiday. I'll be thinking about everyone today when I'm downtown. We are a wonderful group of friends to share our journey. All of you are helping me find my inner peace again. I feel strength, love, joy, friendship and so much more. Let's make this a special day today. Be true to yourself, smile when you look in the mirror. We have been blessed to live in countries that give us opportunity. Things are getting tough around us with fuel prices rising but not as tough as other areas in the world today. It may mean we have to adjust but we can adjust. We have the freedom to choose. There is strength in community - let's hold fast together during the challenges that face us. We are blessed to have the internet and this forum. We are blessed to share as one our troubles with all the miles between us. When you feel weak, remember you are blessed. Make today a great day! Our countries give us freedom to choose. Make the right choice today in all aspects of your life. Happy Birthday! Peggy

Hi! I am here, just in a funk and slowly coming out of it. DD moved last week to Lousiana and it hit home that I now officially have an empty nest. At least while she was at school, I knew she could come home any weekend she chose. Lousianna is just so FAR away. But they made it safely (in a U-Haul towing her car!) and I have kept in touch with her almost daily. So the comunication is there, but I miss her. I have been keeping busy reading, scrapbooking and cleaning out DD's empty room. It has been so HOT here, that I have been content to stay inside with the AC on. It is supposed to be nicer tomorrow and I am going with DH to a car show (he will drive his 62 Nova). Besh - I have read so many books this summer that I would have a hard time listing them all. I did read "The Glass Castle" and loved your comment about it being a "real" memoir! LOL I too thought it was an amazing book and marveled that she and her siblings survived at all. I am reading "Thunderstruck" by Erik Larson right now. I love his writing and attention to detail. I also read "Isacc's Storm" and "The Devil in the White City". He must do an incredible amount of research before he starts a book. I just finished listening to "Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close" by Jonathan Safran Foer. I have to say I cried. Other notable recent reads are, "Water for Elephants" by Sara Gruen, "Left to Tell" (about the genocide in Rwanda) by Immaculee Ilibagzia, and "The Butterfly House" by Marcia Preston. Next up, "Lean Mean Thirteen" by Janet Evanovich. DeeMarie - I have been doing exercises to strengthn my back and keep the muscles stretched and it seems to be helping. I can't sit for too long at the computer, so I haven't been logging on as often as I used to. I can't even sit and read for too long without needing to get up and stretch and move around. I love getting books on tape at the library and listening to them where ever I am. I am considering getting an MP3 player and using my library's resources to download books. Have you read LM13 yet?? Jen - Poor Erica! One time my DS broke his finger and I didn't take him to the doctor's until the next day. He also needed 2 pins to reset the finger. I felt like the worst mother of the year that day. Glad to hear she is on the mend. Patti - Glad Dave got a good report and you can go forward with your trip to TX. I never did get to see those pictures of your DGD! If you get a chance, email me. NHSuzanne - We had such severe storms the last few days too. Trees down in the neighborhood all around me, but we didn't suffer any damage. I am glad you got the brakes fixed and were able to go to VT. I don't have much of a backyard, but I did get some pictures of our local wildlife last week. Can you tell what this is a picture of? DH's is letting me know he is hungry, so I am off to the kitchen. Later, Marci

Hi all! Another MIA checking inÂand hoping that everyone is doing great! I havenÂt been here since my FIL died in late June, as I came down with a "C Diff" infection the night after his funeral. Rog found me unconscious on the bathroom floor and took me to the ER, and I really donÂt remember anything about that night or July 4th. I was in for 3 days, and was deathly sick for the next 2 weeks. (I did lose 23 pounds during this time, thoughÂnasty way to do it!) IÂm OK at this point, but everyoneÂseriouslyÂthe CDC in Atlanta has issued warnings that this could be an epidemic, and the mortality rate has doubled. Since I donÂt want to squick anyone out, please do a google on "C Diff", and remember to wash your hands, and this is very contagious. The next thing that has went on with me is that not only was I praying for Demerol or death while I was in the hospital, I have found that I am a diabetic. Great. Just screaming great. My sugar level was 453 when I went to the ER. (OKÂwellÂI was on prednisone during this time b/c I ended up in the ER the night FIL died with a horrible rash all over my behind and legs, and come to find out it was a reaction that I had to a spider bite a week prior. I was diagnosed with Henoch-Schonlein purpura (HSP) which normally occurs in young boys (yes, I laugh at f@rt jokes, maybe this is payback!) and steroids are the usual treatment for it. It can be serious, and lead to kidney problems, but the chances are small.) So, between the stress (GAD!), the steroids, the ridiculously bad eating habits IÂve developed, IÂm not surprised that my sugar was that high. I didnÂt have any of the usual signs, i.e. excessive thrist, excessive urination, etc but here I am. I am following drÂs orders, but man! I want some sweet iced tea!! AndÂI had to drop out of school for the time being. Which just frustrates me to no end, but whaddya do? When it rains, it pours! So, that it why I havenÂt been here, or anywhere else for that matter. Things are slowly getting back to normal, and things will be good once again. RaeanneÂwhat auction? I wish I was there, IÂd love to call it for you! SuzanneÂI love that pic! WeÂre going to try to grow garlic this fall, so any advice is appreciated! BJÂhugs, my sister! Still busy as ever, I see! DeeÂnew car? What kind? Has anyone heard from Amy or John? Has Patti posted lately? Hope all is well with everyone! Love and hugs, Maddie