Oops, I think I offended some people, i.e., GC's. Sorry, that wasn't my intent. I sometimes don't use the correct words when I'm trying to express myself. What I mean to say is those folks who have to hire a stranger to deal with the whole process. I've read horror stories on this forum from people whose GC was incompetent, lazy, and just didn't care. I know not all are like that and the bad ones are in the minority. deanie1, I'm with your DH on not letting them think I'm desperate. The fact is, my cash money spends anywhere and I'll be darn if I hand it to someone who is not reliable. We are fortunate that we have not had to hurry to get our house finished. Obviously, it's taken us 4 years now!! We've been able to take our time and hire the right people to do certain jobs. From the very first person I hired, the gentleman who cleared and filled our lot. He didn't srvice residential, but took pity on me and accepted our job. We were so impressed by his professionalism and work ethic. We went out to check on the work and could not believe our eyes when we saw how much time he had taken to ensure the dirt that was added, was level and where it needed to be, not just thrown about and every bit of debri from the tree clearing was removed I'm so glad he was so dependable and that's the foot we started on in building process. I told my husband a that time, this experience reassured me that there are talented and professional people out there to do the work, it's just a matter of finding them. Up to now we've been blessed with great subs. The gentleman who did our framing was phenominal and we've called him back to put the siding up. I suppose I posted this message to let people out there who are taking "garbage" from these contrators, that you should stand up to them when they try to jerk you around. Don't accept excuses or poor customer service. Customer service to me is at least 50% of the job if not more? Again, I apologize if I offended anyone, but if you're doing your job, you shouldn't take offense. You good GC's out there need to be offended by others in your field who are making you look bad by the example they set.

GOTCHA!! I see the whole picture here! Thank you all for your imput! It is very understandable and I see things a lot clearer now. Choosing non-married couples makes sense for a lot of reasons. I am no longer miffed and will be very supportive. Actually, I am kind of glad it happened this way because it will allow my fiance a better understanding of the relationship I have with my own god daughter. He is such a wonderful partner and father, that any child he is able to have an intimate relationship with would be truly blessed anyway. No - I am not Catholic, but the rest of my family is. To Carla35 - Yes I do know what it means to be a God Parent. I am a God mother to my best friends' daughter. We baptized our son last July so I am very familiar with the Catholic religions practices regarding God parents and the sacrament of baptism. To Colleenoz - My fiance's neices and nephews not calling me aunt doesn't bother me. I used it as an example for you all to better understand my relationship with the children. It is up to their parents and them as to what they call me and if they ever decide to even call me "aunt". Also - we DO have tentative wedding dates set for either November 1st or 8th of 2008. We plan to marry in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico. Thank you all for your comments!

Image by: wintersown That's okay, don't worry too much about that. Experience is a great teacher and we all learn as we go along. I personally don't know the botanical name of lots of my plants. When I first started gardening and trading I actually didn't know the common name of most of my plants ;-) But I still felt comfortable about trading my seeds because I put a good description of them on the packets. I trade my seeds and if I don't know their name I make as good a description as I can in my posted trade offerings so there's no confusion. I feel confident when I make a well described seed trade....the other trader knows the plant description and they trade for my seeds knowing that I have done my best to decribe what I'm offering. It's fair that way. New traders are often new gardeners too and so they haven't had enough experience with plant names to accurately name the plant they gathered seeds from. What information should I put on the packets? I always put the following information on my packets: Common Plant Name and/or Botanical Name Flower color or "mixed" Height at maturity Sunlight requirements: full sun, part shade, or shade (fs, ps, or shade, or sometimes fs-ps which means full sun to part shade, or ps-shade, which means part shade to shade) A, P, or B (annual, perennial, or biennial) My email address (optional) My name (optional) ======================================================== My trader didn't put all the information on the packet that I thought should be on it....what should I do? Email your trader asap and politely ask for specifics....sometimes a trader can't offer them as they're sharing/trading the excess of a humongous pack of seeds that came their way and IT wasn't labeled with specifics. If you've got a packet that's not labeled with specifics grow it anyway. A packet that says something as simple as just "marigolds" is often a joy to grow. WHY? Well...you know it's an annual, marigolds love full sun. So put the seedlings where they'll get full sun. But I don't know the height.... Plant it in the middle of the border or up front. If they grow tall then you'll have added "dramatic depth" to your garden and reduced the monotony of everything short being up front. A brilliant patch of tallish flowers at the front of the border is often fascinating and is NEVER boring. But I don't know the color..... Marigolds can be yellow/gold, orange or mahogany red. These are the choices....sometimes they have a blend of those colors on the same flowers, or it might be a pack of mixed single colors. What I'm trying to say is that suprises are part of gardening and that you should celebrate the beauty of your plants even if they aren't what you expected. A garden is for relaxing and enjoying. It's NOT for causing frustrations....expect an occasional suprise and you'll be very happy in your garden. ========================================================= Flower Colors...I'm putting in this list as a help in labeling seed packets....no one is perfect in their eyesight so being "close" is just as acceptable as being "accurate". (This color list came from the "Field Book of American Wild Flowers by F. Schuyler Matthews, 1902) Pure yellow Deep yellow Golden yellow Pure orange Scarlet Pure red Pure pink Crimson Crimson-pink Magenta Magenta-pink Pure purple Violet Blue-violet Ultramarine Pure blue Madder purple Madder brown

I know this is long, Heidi, but I've got personal experience with your situation. To be brief, I'm confident that this tree is not even close to death's door, and would be much better served by fixing the causes of its decline now so it can green up and be much healthier to deal with the stress of repotting next summer. In particular, your ficus was thriving until three months ago, and we know that the decline was caused by low light and poor watering, which means that fixing the root congestion and soil aren't an emergency. To be clear, gardengal is probably right that you could repot now without killing the tree, but because it would be easy to get it green again by correcting the biggest problems now, you would be best off waiting until summer to do major root work and put it in a great growing medium. Then you will be rewarded with a burst of new growth, and you'll soon be pinching growing tips and pruning to control its enthusiastic growth and tell it to fill in all those gaps left by dropped leaves. My experience: I have two smaller roughly five year old ficuses that were completely rootbound and were stuck in a dim corner. I often forgot about watering until leaves started yellowing and dropping, and the I'd fill their tall plastic 'saucers' and left the water there until they stopped soaking it up. In other words, I drowned the roots every time I watered, and maximized the amount of deadly mineral deposits in the soil. Aside from feeble attempts to maintain a few leaves, they had almost stopped growing entirely because their depleted energy reserves made them more vulnerable to attack and only allowed them to put our a few leaves at a time, and most of the buds and leaves that appeared were killed by spider mites. But these are tough plants, so they clung to life for about three years before I finally cared enough to search for answers and found these forums. I immediately started treating the mite infestation, thoroughly flushed the pots (I swear I could hear them sigh with relief), fertilized with a weak solution of Foliage Pro, which has a great ratio of basic nutrients plus all the micronutrients plants need, moved it in front of my best window, which only provides mediocre light, and added bright white (not soft white) 5000k 100W led and cfl bulbs in clamp-on fixtures. Two months later, each branch has about half a dozen new leaves, including some emerging near the stem (a sign that the tree is getting better). It's wonderful to see them getting so green, and I'm already reading up on how to prune them when they get growing again. So Heidi, if I were in your place, I'd start by checking the leaves for spider mites with a bright light and a magnifying glass (they're tiny red dots on the leaves, and you may see little bits of webs on the leaves our branches). Ask about treatment if you find any. Then I'd flush the pot (details below), fertilize with a 3:1:2 ratio fertilizer (miracle gro general purpose granules are easy to find and the right ratio), move it to the best window I had, and put two 100 or brighter led or cfl bulbs in it for 12 hours a day, using a timer. From then on, check soil moisture by pushing a sharpened 3/8" dowel all the way through to the bottom of the pot, and DO NOT WATER until the dowel comes out completely clean and dry (at that point there's still a lot of water inside the soil particles). When that happens, water until about 15% of the water exits the drain holes, let it drain, and then either tilt the pot at 45 degrees for 15-30 minutes after watering to remove excess water, or insert a wick into a drain hole and raise the pot up so the wick won't come in contact with the drained water. You can wait until the surface of the soil is dry to start checking the soil moisture, but after that you should check daily until you have a feel for how long it takes for the poor to dry up. About flushing: flush with lukewarm water, using about ten times the pot's capacity, then give it a weak solution of fertilizer. Use R/O (reverse osmosis) water if possible; water from supermarket water machines are usually $.39 per gallon, and that little pot will maybe need two or three gallons to do the job. My water is hard, so I used R/O water to flush, and because my tap water is hard I use water from my cheap faucet-mounted filter for regular watering. And the reason midsummer is the best time to do something stressful is that 1) ample summer sunlight generates much more energy from the leaves than even a lot of winter sunlight can provide, and 2) the plant is programmed to put energy into new growth in summer, whereas in winter it wants to store it for use in the spring. From several people's experience, including Al (talks), who knows whereof he speaks, if you take two healthy plants and repot one now and one next June, the second will be in better shape next fall than the one you repotted a year earlier. Sorry for my rambling post, and I hope it helps at least a little.