I just can not understand the mentality of those who get their pleasure from hurting other people. I have an email system which thinks every thing is junk. So I scan my Junk email and only save the ones from people I know and the rest is deleted. Every day I receive 100 emails from people who want to sell me drugs and Viagra. Don't these people get a day off.

jaymaneul: Honestly, I would not use Gibbens Pools again and I would not recommend them at this time. We signed our contract in February and we are still not finished. We were told 6-8 weeks completion time from the time we signed and we are still waiting for the pool to be complete. We had to get the pool replastered due to color discrepancies. They finished it this past week and although it looks fantastic, there are two areas where water sat in the shallow end/dripped down the walls(didn't blow out the skimmer equalizer line) as the pool was filling up, leaving unsightly discolorations. Gibbens has not addressed this issue yet. Working with Gibbens has been an uphill battle. Their subs (other than the plasterers) have been nothing but excellent, but dealing with the owners of the company has been like talking to a brick wall (Gibbens subs everything out, btw). Our pool will be great once the issues are worked out, but working them out is taking forever. Example: when they shot the pool, the gunite overspray got over everything, most importantly our black, iron fence. We called the company the following day to let them know. They said it would be cleaned. This was in March. To this day, we still have gunite all over the fence. After talking to a fence installer, he said that the fence will have to be replaced. It seems as if they ignore the problem, it will just go away (the sheer descent wall was the same way). I can tell you from talking to the subs, that we are not the only ones that seem to have difficulty with this company. Maybe not to the extreme we are experiencing, but a majority of the complaints from other pool owners is the amount of time it takes to complete the pool. As for your contract, Gibbens (as many construction type businesses) uses a typical 'builder's contract'. Essentially, it is a contract written in their favor. Many builders (home, pool, etc) expect a bonus if they complete a project before the deadline, esp. if you stipulate a penalty clause (I doubt Gibbens, or any other pool company, would go for that type of contract). I don't want to harp on the negatives too much, because when it is all said and done, we will have a gorgeous, well built pool (thanks to the subs). Likewise, there are two sides to every story, and I'm obviously biased. If you need any additional info, let me know. Good luck with pool build.

Many of the perennials I brought with me in the move are pretty old. The simple farmhouse hosta (green w/ white borders) has been divided many times. Mine is about 15 years old, but it came from the house where I grew up, which came from the house where my father grew up, which came from the house where his mother grew up. Similarly, the Siberian iris I brought with me is about 20 years, and the bleeding heart is a division from a plant I placed when I was a girl. My geranium maccorrhizum, too. Other oldies: My lavender bush is 13 years old this year. My Krossa Regal hostas, too. This house has an absolutely enormous Geranium pratense. Based on the ownership records of the house, and knowing who gardened and who didn't, it's probably 20-25 years old. There's also a huge (!!) clump of Shasta daisies that have been in the same spot for about that same amount of time.

I'm going to overlook all the relationship issues here, plenty of great advice has been given. I'll just give my 2 cents on the design aspect. Maybe his mother loves your style and that is part of why she wants the condo. Her lifestyle has changed over the years and maybe she doesn't know how to let go of some things but maybe she loves your style too. If that's the case, it might not be too insensitive to say you want to change the style of the new house. I would take the changes slowly, you don't want to trample on feet but as you remodel, you can always fall back on the idea that you want to change things before you start a family because you know once a baby is here not much else will get done for a while. This may be a more gentle way for his mother to accept the changes, and make her excited about being a grandmother one day. It might make it easier for her to let go knowing that broken furniture or lots of storage isn't safe for curious little ones. Good luck!