Cynthia, SO nice to finally hear from you. I was getting worried about and "that fool dog of your's". I can't even begin to contemplate how hard this must be. At least with Rex he still had 3 legs left to hop around on... and while he may've been sore for some time he could at least move around and shift position without yelping. I really would like to see a picture if you're up to shooting it and then posting it. Hang tough! I love candles in the windows of a home (pictures? look who's talkin'). The only reason I don't do it here is that there are windowboxes under the roadside window and I fill them with greens that would hide the candles. But when I was a kid we used them. And, MARTIE, we added one for every Sunday in Advent! All the decorations were left up until the Epiphany (Twelfth Night) and they came down the next day. I finished the 3 pediments this afternoon and put them up. I like them. But need to add something pale/bright to the lower edge to keeping them from "oozing" visually into the window below... . Shoulda bought more .99 lemons at Wallyworld, damnit. I have the big pediment on the dining room table right now and am about to embark on that. Boxwood is holding up, and I'm a whiz at making white pine swags now. :) (smells really good in here and the cats are having a total blast... in and out, in and out, doing their wonderful kitty routines. (thinking of Cynthia and the candles). Norma, your photographs are lovely (no "blurries" here, either)! I see a lot more color than just green grass in those shots. I love the way Mother Nature changes the palette over the course of the seasons but gives us the shimmer of rain and snow, instead. Martie, Kyle should be excited about his position. He must be having the time of his life. I'm a bit envious, frankly! :) I'm still struggling with how Mum's life ended, Martie. Not that I think I could have done more (aside from the ususal regrets you feel when someone you love dies), but there are several things I would love the opportunity to go back and "fine tune". I've thought about your question repeatedly over the past few days and still don't really have what I want to say completely figured out. It's such a huge thing to face and I still feel the full force of the wave that overtook me and hurled me onto the beach. I'm still shaking my head and trying to "collect myself"; checking again and again to make sure "everything is here". A good, family plan is the perfect place to start and having the doctor know you is KEY. IF you're able, make sure your Mom's doctor "follows" her if she ends up living with her children or enters a nursing home. That's one of the things I most regret... I loved her doctor when she was with me. He was young, hip, and all about minimizing medications and keeping her ACTIVE. I deeply regret the loss of that when Mum entered that awful place. Many, many thoughts and reminiscences today... alone with my thoughts, the animals and my final project (helmeet working AND going out with his buddy tonight). Some tears, a lot of "singing along", and the appreciation that the decorations are really ALL Mum. I learned it somewhere, afterall! Thinking of my friends tonight and still hoping for some basic pointers on how to "light" a basic TECHINICAL shot with my camera. Please? (MY tent would have a perpetually warm hot water bottle, blue cheese and pate. A cat, a good biography... want to know more about Martin Luther and Abraham Lincoln. Sparkling water with lemon, and Pinot Grigio or a nice red wine. Clementines, olives, and almonds. It would smell like evergreens, too).

Have you done a Google search on it?

The past couple of years of both of their lives was exhausting for us (their caregivers). I'm 49 and have 3 teenagers and own a shop. Days were none stop from the moment I woke until the moment I fell into bed. I wouldn't change it for the world. I had one sister who thought they needed taking care of. Would it have been easier? Yes for us. Would it have been better? Not if its something they weren't ready for, which they weren't. The past 4 months, cleaning out their home of 87 years of life has been the hardest thing I've ever had to do and the most rewarding. I'm still not completely finished. The house is empty and waiting to be sold. I go in about once a week to make sure all is ok and I leave knowing that I was able to help two wonderful people be happy and content right up to the end. I hope If I'm lucky enough to live to be 87 that I'll be right were I want to be when I die. It might be assisted living or a smaller home or right where I am right now. I hope my children will not make me choose which things are important to me by their standards. I understand what you're saying and I'm glad you were able to help your parents live out their lives. I think, however, that the balance is different if there's only one of you doing the caretaking (along with job/career and family obligations) and/or if the "destination" is not death but long-term care. Right now my 70-something mother is caring for my wheelchair-bound brother. He has a degenerative disease that, for better or worse, does not really affect his lifespan. I am responsible for his care after my mother passes on. It is not possible for me to provide my brother with the full-time care he needs and keep any kind of decent-paying job -- nevermind the career I have now. He really will need to move to a nursing home -- a shame, because he will be a generation younger than almost anyone else there and because, at some hours of the day, he does pretty well for himself. Nursing home spots -- especially at good facilities (or, very especially, at one that can better serve people his age) -- don't open up automagically when you need them. So my mother and I have agreed that, if we find a good spot for my brother before it actually is needed on a daily basis, it would make sense to move him there and let him acclimate to this new stage in his life. My brother likely will not be ready for that whenever it happens. At this point, my brother rarely understands the limitations imposed by this disease. We're doing what we can to prepare him. But the time ultimately will not be of his choosing. When my mother passes on, my brother may have to deal not only with that loss, but with a complete change in his living accommodations. Moving him to a care facility - especially before it's absolutely necessary -- is not easy, either. But, for him, we think it will be the better way to go.

oopsie - where in the "nook" would you put the bookcase? It's where it is now because 1) I had planned on doing built-on bookcases on either side when we built the house, had been looking for a matching (IKEA) one for other side until my dad brought the Victrola over and 2) now it balances the Victrola. The Victrola is on that side b/c of where the crank is. The LS is 5ft long and 3ft deep - so can't move it to other end of area rug until we make the nook bigger, since it's too hard to get past Ds's chair. I don't want to move the sofa down closer to the bay - I like it centered on the slider. Eventually we'll build in bookcases and a window seat (not deep - will follow the contours of the bay so we can still fit the tree). The opening to the bay is 9 ft across, with 1ft 11" wall space on either side (where bookcase and Victrola are). Until we can afford to get that done we're living with the sofabed (bad idea to put it in the "great room" open to kitchen), we were trying to seat 5-7 people so bought LS and then found ottoman at GW, but I'm willing to get rid of the LS and ottoman as long as we can still seat 4-5 comfortably (not on wooden dining chairs & barstools). 2 chairs could be split up on either side of slider, LS cannot ;-) I sort of like the monochromatic scheme (very soothing), but would like to bring more pattern (besides tone-on-tone stripes) into the room. I wouldn't be adverse to painting the walls a different color when/if we redo the tile in the kitchen, but it would have to work with the oak cabinets, pine trim, tan carpet, linen shades and khaki/mocha sofa. Well, maybe not the carpet b/c if/when we do tile (and sunroom) I'd likely be putting hardwoods in FR. But the sofa and shades have to stay - we have too much $$ into them.