I also found my husband jerking off. At first I thought it was ok, then it started bothering me. Then I asked him to stop doing it, then I asked him to do it (because I kept telling myself that's how men are wired) in a way I wouldn't find out. Then I caught him and got furious. First I found his underwear with cum, then I caught him in the act. I also know I haven't dealt with the problem the best way. I have tried and feel bad to ask him not to do it. It's kind of unfair to ask him not to do it, if sometimes when he's gone for work and I get turned on I also do it. I think boys will be boys, and we shouldn't be worrying so much about what they do in their privacy. We, even as a couple who live together, share beds, share rooms, share food, should also have our intimate moments to be alone. He has never told me no when I want to have sex, he has never rejected me. I never do that either, never reject him. I think that a healthy sexual life doesn't mean that we should have sex every night, or that everything has to be shared. I am my own person and also need my time to myself. Am I that wrong?

I'm so sorry. I was in your shoes this time last year. I knew our almost 13 year old German Shorthair Pointer was at the end of his life, and I was thinking I'd wait until after Christmas, but I realized that I needed to do it the right thing for him even though it was hard for me. We put him down on Dec. 17. :( I probably waited a bit too long, and I didn't realize how much stress I'd been under thinking about whether or not it was the right time until he was gone. There was almost a sense of relief. Missing him wasn't as difficult as wondering and worrying about whether or not I was doing the right thing. We all still miss him terribly, though. When the time comes, I highly recommend getting a vet to come to your house. It was so peaceful and less stressful than taking him to the office.

Go for it. I've helped people I know redo kitchens...I've done 6 kitchens already. I do it because I enjoy doing it. I don't charge anything...I do it for friends or acquaintances. I start with layout and then get them to look at houzz for inspiration, I help them determine style, talk to them about function, then help them with their selections. A lot of what I do is throw out options for them to "try on" to see if they'd like it or not. That way, when they decide, they feel as if they've explored all the options and have more confidence in the choices they've made. I also make sure, like a checklist, that they think about all the necessary things: electrical, lighting, plumbing, flooring, hardware, colors, surfaces, etc. Esp in a kitchen redo, there's a lot to think about. You need to be flexible enough to go with them and their style...which may not be your style. (For example, some kitchens were white, some painted cabinets, some cherry wood...some traditional, cottage, or whatever.) You need to work within their budget as you are spending their money, not yours. You also need to be aware that you are not the final decider and they may make decisions that you think are mistakes, but it's they're place and they have to live with it, not you. But I like doing it...it's fun for me. I would never do it 'professionally' because as soon as money comes into the picture, it changes everything. Also, if you do decide to go professional, plan on getting some training and credentials.

A rectangular trestle table (with slightly rounded, non-pointed corners if you can find it with these), ideally with at least 1 or 2 leaves, will seat more people than a table with legs on the corners. Who will be sitting at the table on a daily basis, and as visitors? If you will be buying a table of reasonably decent quality to keep for the long run, and will have people older than little kids sitting at it, at least 4 chairs would be a minimum, and 6 would be better--if there is some place else in the house where the extras could be used or stored until needed. When my daughter was first married, she bought a table with 4 chairs due to their under 1000 sq' house and kitchen-eating area smaller than yours. When they wanted to entertain, which often was a total of 6 adults, 2 people had to sit on folding chairs and be relatively uncomfortable, although she could have put 2 more "good" chairs into the small space if she'd had them long enough to enjoy the meal and conversation. For years, I had an 8 x 12' dining room with the long side open to the living room. Because a 6 x 10' rug defined the dining space and therefore the location of the table, there was actually about 9' in width. I routinely had 8 people (7' long table including 2 leaves) seated. Crowded? A little, but doable. How busy will the walkway at the "bottom" of the kitchen be--what does it connect? If it's not super busy, could you shift the left wall of cabinets and the island 3 to 6" into the walkway to get more space in the eating area? Anne