skip to main content

Help! How do I overcome Fear?

madelinesgarden

14 years ago

I realize this forum is not about spiders but I see many posts with great knowledge on the subject. I love to garden and am not too bothered by the garden variety spiders. But recently as I was pulling up some plants from one of my beds I disturbed a black widow's nest. The spider was huge! I have seen them here and there but this one really freaked me since it was so close. I now have stopped gardening.

I had been bitten badly a few years back and I guess it just brought back any fear I had. I go out every day and try to do something but I do not get far. It is somewhat humiliating and frustrating to think that something so small has this much power over me. I was actually going to interview to be a master gardener but feel like an idiot over the spider incident.

Has anyone had a similar thing happen to them and how did you overcome it? Thank you for any help.

Sort by:Oldest

Comments (4)

sirsedum
14 years ago
catch it, and kill it, maybe you will begin to feel more powerful than the spider. OR capture it, and keep it as a pet. remember the big ones are the females. if all else fails, put seven dust in the soil around your plants, and give them time to die. Dont forget your Gloves!
:D Good luck!
madelinesgarden
Original Author
14 years ago
Thanks so much for the advice. What is seven dust?
Related Discussions
What can I do with botulism-fear jars?
Q
Comments (5)
I know just how you feel. I have canned 19 different fruits and veges this year. My mistake was I used some - not all, older canning books. I am faced with the prospect of throwing out 30 or more jars of preserves. When it gets me down, however, I think of how I'd feel if one of my daughters got sick from eating it or my hubby and I'd throw the whole lot away in a second. Before you know it your shelves will start to fill up with beautiful safe jars and you'll forget about the ones you had to throw out. I'm just grateful there is a forum like this to help me out and I'm sure you feel the same. seaglassgirl
...See More
Do tomato plants overcome being overwatered?
Q
Comments (5)
Will they bounce back or should I just toss them out and replace them? ***** As long as they're yellow and don't have brown leaves falling off I think there's a chance they may recover. Don't remove any foliage and don't fertilize them. Let them just do what they can themselves. my experience is not with overwatering, rather, it's with drowning plants. Now I didn't do it myself, LOL, but there were several low spots in the field where I used to grow my plants and after torrential downpours those areas would have plants that were almost completely covered if it were early in the season. And I'd madly dig ditches to try and drain those areas. First they turn yellow with curled leaves, then the leaves turn brown and fall off and once that happens there's no return, at least in my experience. Waterlogging cuts off the oxygen to the plant as well as any root uptake of nutrients. And yes, it certainly is variety dependent and I agree completely with that. But those plants that were just yellow often did make a comeback, again, variety dependent, so I wouldn't discard them yeat without giving them a chance to live. Carolyn
...See More
Need advice: Overcoming a fear/phobia
Q
Comments (23)
I don't have any advice about overcoming your phobia that hasn't already been given here, but I wanted to chime in that there is no rhyme or reason to phobias, so it's not helpful for others to say "that phobia makes no sense". I have always had pet fish and I adore them. I have no trouble letting them nibble on my hand as I clean their tank, etc. I can swim in ponds with little fish darting around, and I have swum in the Gulf of Mexico with harmless sand sharks bumping around in clear view. But I am very unhappy about visiting aquariums where there is just a wall of glass between me and big fish. And (thank you, Diana Gabaldon) I am freaked out swimming in lakes because I am afraid of . . . the Loch Ness monster! Yes, I know it is ridiculous to be afraid that the Loch Ness monster is in a lake in the US. And even if the Loch Ness monster WAS in the lake, it's probably a harmless vegetarian and wouldn't bother me anyway. After all, I would PAY to swim with manatees, so why be leery of Nessy?Because knowing it is ridiculous intellectually isn't the same thing as not being filled with heart-pounding dread when you're at the lake!
...See More
Bad return design? How to overcome?
Q
Comments (4)
In general,I agree ductwork is probably wrong and modulating furnace will not solve your problem. Ordinarly secound story tend's toward warm both seasons. A good contractor can fix it without our help. Not saying this is the best solution but boosting supply and/or return with suplimential duct blower or delaying furnace blower after off cycle might help "IF" ducts are inside envelope of home.
...See More
rhizo_1 (North AL) zone 7
14 years ago
iedesign, I'd like to discourage your use of Sevin (correct spelling) dust. It's a highly toxic, broad spectrum pesticide never recommended for the control of spiders.

I sympathize strongly with your problem, as I can 'confess' to being an arachnophobe myself. Not much fun for a professional horticulturist! The 'treatment' for this fear is much the same as for any phobia: education and exposure.

The more I learned about spiders, the more in control I felt. Soon, I was able to identify nearly any spider I might come across, know its predictable behavior and habits, the pros and cons of leaving it alone, etc.

It's amazing how much power you can get from information. Not only about spider identification and behavior, but about how to prevent bites in the first place.

Regarding Black Widows. We have large numbers of them around the outside of our home and in the garage. I always look carefully for their tell-tale webs, which they seem to hang out like a warning flag. Gloves are a must when cleaning the garage....if we did it more often we could eliminate the spiders altogether!

I don't keep my pots stacked up near the house any more, and when I get ready to pull out my seedling flats and cell packs for early spring sowing, I'm prepared to kill a few widows.

By the way, I fear chemicals more that I do spiders these days! You can face your fear and conquer it. Trust me, if I can, so can you.
madelinesgarden
Original Author
14 years ago
Thanks so much rhizo! You've made me feel much better about my issue. I will definitely take all of your advice. It's time to get back to gardening.

Related Stories

THE ART OF ARCHITECTURE Design Practice: 11 Ways Architects Can Overcome Creative Blocks

By Eric Reinholdt, Architect

When inspiration remains elusive, consider these strategies for finding your creative muse

DECLUTTERING Decluttering — Don't Let Fear Hold You Back

By Alison Hodgson

Sure, you might make a mistake when tackling a decluttering project, but that's OK. Here's why

WALL TREATMENTS How to Get Past Your Fear of Bold Wallpaper Prints

By Toronto Interior Design Group

Follow these tips and you’ll never be afraid of putting up that pattern-crazy paper again

FLOORS How to Use Bold Rugs Without Fear

By Laura Gaskill

You can embrace vivid hues and strong patterns on the floor when you keep these 10 ideas in mind

EXTERIORS Help! What Color Should I Paint My House Exterior?

By Jennifer Ott Design

Real homeowners get real help in choosing paint palettes. Bonus: 3 tips for everyone on picking exterior colors

COFFEE WITH AN ARCHITECT 10 Tips to Help You Put Off Procrastinating

By Jody Brown Architecture, pllc

Blank page staring at you? Look it in the eye, then vanquish it in 10 only slightly meandering steps

ORGANIZING Stick to Your Resolutions: Help From a Pro Organizer

By Jennifer Phelps: Organize. Design. Reinvent!

Accomplish your goals — from decluttering to rediscovering fitness — for real this time

LIFE Decluttering — How to Get the Help You Need

By Alison Hodgson

Don't worry if you can't shed stuff and organize alone; help is at your disposal

KITCHEN DESIGN Design Dilemma: My Kitchen Needs Help!

By KitchenLab Interiors

See how you can update a kitchen with new countertops, light fixtures, paint and hardware

Sixties Southern Style: Inspiration from 'The Help'

By Becky Harris

Oscar-nominated movie's sets include formal entertaining spaces, front porch breezes and lots of florals

Sponsored

Davidson Builders

1 Review

Franklin County's Full-Scale General Contractor

More Discussions

Can anyone confirm these are mealybugs?

4

Need help identifying this beetle

2

Need help IDing this moth

3

What mosquitoe is this?

1