Beth, I noticed an outbreak of similarly coloured petunias appearing all over the UK (gold and maroon) which caused me to literally avert my eyes on walking past. As a rule, I am a lover of bright colours (no beige in my house or wardrobe) but am strictly old school when it comes to roses - white or pink (or palest yellow at a pinch). Course, that does not apply to the dahlia beds, nor the many rows of cutting gladioli or luridly coloured annuals (apart from said petunias) in my allotment. Particularly enjoying a combo of orange, purple, deep red and acid green.......just not in the roses. And yeah, striped roses, not even pink and white, really do it for me but I was agog at the variety available in the US.

tigerdunes, Thanks for your input. I posted some incorrect info on option 2. The correct coil should be: CNPHP3117ATA with the 58CVA070-12 Infinity VS gas furnace instead of: CSPHP3017ATA HI-EFF R410A Evaporator coil. Regarding option with with AC instead of a HP, I have this information: 58MVC060 95% VS furnace 24APA524 15 SEER CSPHP2112ATA evap coil inf t'stat $6847 before C&R ($4647 after C&R) So the AC option is about $150-$300 less than the HP options, mainly due to equipment rebates and an additional electric rebate. From a conservative perspective, I'd swing to option 2... but hate to give up that 95% furnace for so little difference in price! The Carrier contractor says he doesn't see any problem with installing the 90+ in the attic, since the line is only 2-3' and goes down an interior wall. I wish the 80% option was significantly cheaper so as to make the conservative choice easier to make. I'll check on the addition of a pleated filter media cabinet, but am not sure I'll be happy with the additional cost. We don't currently have issues with indoor air quality and haven't had issues with the existing blower motor. But maybe the new system is different in that regard? Regarding the heat strips.. are you suggesting getting rid of the gas heat altogether upstairs and just use a heat pump backed up by heat strips?

I once knew a popular girl in high school (16) who also dated a 23 year old. Then one day she told us she was getting married and Friday was her last day of school(at 16)! We never saw her again. As we graduated and moved on with our lives, every once in a while I would wonder why she was in such a hurry to grow up and how she missed so, so much. Those years were so much fun, especially into the 20's... and I imagined her at 16 living the life of everyone else's mom...doing laundry, cleaning the house, etc. I don't not know if she had kids right away of not. I imagine they lived in some dumpy place because they were too young to have any money, and since she never graduated, I do not imagine that there were any great job offers coming her way. I also imagine at some point she looked back and was furious at her parents for letting her do this, and not stopping her. She had so much going for her, and settled for so little.

I have been down that cancer road several times, so I know how physically and emotionally exhausting it is. You have to do what you can live with long-term, and if you feel you couldn't live with yourself if you left your husband in these circumstances, then all you can do is minimize the wear-and-tear on yourself and your daughter. I am sorry your step-son is so impossible and even sorrier your husband is so difficult and unsupportive. Cancer didn't suddenly make him a better or different person. Here are my suggestions: 1) Protect yourself and your daughter financially for the possible time when your husband is no longer with you. You may want to set up a separate bank account and sequester some of your resources so you are assured of access to monies regardless of anything your husband might do (like decide suddenly to put his sons' names on the account). If possible, consult with an attorney regarding estate planning. Given your husband's current intractability, you may not have any luck securing his cooperation. But at least you will know what your legal rights are. 2) Prioritize your tasks. Your husband's medical care is a priority. Your daughter's physical and emotional needs are priorities. Doing your step-son's laundry, picking up after him or fixing meals are not. At 14 he can do those things for himself. If he doesn't do them, his problem. 3) Look into support systems for yourself and your husband. That would include hospital services, family support groups and Hospice, so that if the burdens get too heavy to carry alone you know who to go to. Do these things while you're still capable of thinking clearly. A time may come when you're too tired to think at all. This assumes you decide to stick it out. You may decide this is too thankless a task and leave your husband and his rotten kids to their own devices. Feel right in your choice and the judgements of others won't matter.