newhostalady, if my experience can be a cautionary tale, then, yes, that is a good thing. But they told me that they'd be dropping all the shingles into the dumpster on the driveway and you see what happened in the back. Get things like bird baths, feeders, pots of plants, etc. safely put away because you don't know for sure where things will land, lol. But a solid roof, ....gotta have it, right? Good luck on yours! Phil, I was just thinking that I should get my windows washed because how much worse can it get now with more ladders out there?.....a roofing nail in your shoe, and ilovetogrow finding nails nine months later, those are both good reasons for me to wear better shoes and get a magnet out there. As the plants die back this fall I'll probably be able to find a lot more. Just today I found a piece of shingle and a nail close to one of the bird baths I was filling. For one moment I thought about how bernd said the nail is good for my soil. Then I imagined hitting that nail with my shovel some day and tossed it in the trash. littlebug5, I understand the apprehension that goes with any projects like this. My DH still thinks we need new gutters, ~sigh~. When they built the decks, I got some of that bright caution tape and bamboo stakes. They managed not to ruin some shrubs I had blocked off that way. Maybe that will work for your cherry tree and hydrangea. Good luck to you, too!

I just read this post and wanted to respond. I was interested in the responses that you recieved V. Some were helpful. I have a few thoughts on this subject as well. I found it amazing that someone would have the guts to post that if you can't feed them don't breed them. As if by asking the question about how to prepare for the future, you are not doing your duty. It sounds like you are doing a great job feeding them, if you will, and are now looking toward the future. Good for you. I also found it interesting that the debate came down to a pick one scenario for everyone who did respond. You are crazy to pay for their college and not take care of yourself or you are selfish to take care of your retirement and not help your kids. I put forth that you have set two goals and want to know how to make both of those goals work. Without knowing more about your financial situation, no one can tell you how to do this or if it's possible. What I will tell you is about myself. I am a stay at home mother of three. My husband is ten years older than I am. He wants to retire in his early 60's (62 at the latest). Our children will just be going to college at about the time he wants to retire. I want to pay for college for my children. These are both valid goals. We gathered all of our information together and went and paid 400$ to a financial planner. It was the BEST thing we ever did. We are not rich. But we thought it was well worth the money to have someone help us look at our overall financial well being and help us draw some basic predictions (conservative predicitons) towards the future. He looked at our insurance and our finances. We found out we probably needed more disability insurance, if something were to happen to my husband, there is no way we could have held on to the house and made things work, even if I went back to work. We found out that we were doing fine with retirement and needed to think about college funds. I have the peace of mind now, knowing that if my husband were to die or get injured we could keep the house, maintain our style of living and be OK. And I won't have to go to work. That is important to us. We can retire in our 60s but it will most likely be age 65 (instead of 62) and pay most of our kids college expensis. I would strongly suggest that you think about going to a financial planner. Pick one wisely but know that they are worth the money in my book. Some things to think about- you can save for the local state university and your child will end up in Harvard. Then what? For us, we decided to save as much as we could towards helping our children get a basic four year degree. If we have enough to pay for their college, great. If they go to Harvard, Yale etc- high expensis, they will have to work and get student loans and scholarships. Or you will save for college and they won't go to college. Then what? This is one reason we have not put anything in their name that will equal a large chunk of money that will be theirs at age 18. Although they are adults at age 18, we know that they are still young and still lack the in depth decision makign skills they might need. We would hate to see our money spent on a nice car at the expense of college. The choice will be theirs at that time. What college to go to? How to help pay for it- live at home, work, not go? They will be well on their way to adult hood and able to make decisions that impact their future. Even now, our children are encouraged to save for college. (ages 4,2,5 months). We take any gift money sent to them and put it in the bank in their name. We give them a small allowance and help them split it up to tithing, spending, savings (my 2 and 5 months old don't get it yet, but they will). We are setting a policy now that any money they get in gifts at least 1/2 will go to the bank. This will be their money towards college and other expensis they may have as they grow and leave home. (Down payment on a home? Down payment on an appt? Down payment on a car? college?) The other thing we did- we took all of our money (except for a little bit) and put it in our accounts. We have not seperated out college vs retirement vs a big wedding. We figure it is all ours and if something comes up that we have to spend it, we want to be able to do so with out feeling like we are spending our childrens' money. WE earned it and we want to use it the best way we need to at any given time. You just never know what will come up (accident, job loss, etc.)... So it's in one big pot with our name on it (except for a very little bit). Closer to college time we will sit down and figure out where we stand- how much we have total, how much we can help each child out with college, how much we need for retirement etc. Then we will help our children. It is my belief that we had these children and along the lines of if you can't feed them don't breed them- we want to help them along in their adult hood the best we can. It seems a shame to force them to take on student loans when we will hopefully be in a position to help them if not pay for their college totally. I have some personal reasons for wanting to help my children through college based on my history. But there you have it. On the flip side though, we do not want to hurt our retirement or not retire to help our children. As someone posted earlier- $30,000 at age 30 is easier to pay off in the long run than the same debt at age 60 on a fixed income. I maintain that there is probably a fine line between these two goals that you can walk. I would put forth that with some research and budgeting, most families can be in the position we are now in. It's not ideal- we scrimp a bit and we don't do everything (many) of the things I'd like to do (like move to a huge house, go on more vacations, fly etc). But I feel good about where we stand. We know we can take care of ourselves and our children now and for many years to come. We know we can retire and help our kids through college. A 529 is a great option. We have one for each child. There are other options- roth iras, coverdale ira, schwab accounts, drips, etc. You get the idea. This is one reason we went to a financial planner. He helped us untangle the information and then backed off and let us make the decisions that we felt were best. Good Luck. Ginger

I feel pretty lucky even with the terrible cold, most nights are 5 deg. or lower. It's the wind chill that is a killer!! I stay in most of the time. Been lucky with no outages, which I think must be about the worst for people. It snows but I have lived with that all my life so just accept it. I have a freezer that is stocked, quilts to make, and books to read, the computer works, the sun has shown a lot lately.........what more can I ask for??lol I do feel for those who have had it worse this winter in the Mid west and the south. Difficult to deal with quantity and the unusual.

My ds was similar to that in preschool. He would get into trouble soooo much! I would talk to him, put him in time-out at home, take his favorite toys away, take away movie time, etc. I cried over it a lot blaming myself and thinking I must be a horrible mother for my son to act that way! He was not like this at home and I couldn't understand it. I am not sure what made me realize this, but the program he was in was not very structured. There was lots of free-time and if he chose not to do group time he could play instead. The teachers were young and inexperienced. I ended up finding a Head Start preschool/pre-k program. It is a very structured program for low-income and at-risk kids. Because I was a single mom in college at the time I qualified for their services. The teachers all have college degrees (which they did not in the daycare preschool he was in prior to that). They had a lot of experience and were very kind to him. He thrived in that structure. Sure he tested the waters at first, but they were very consistant and he adapted well. He is 9 now and still remembers those 2 teachers at Head Start and how much fun it was there!