For the lighting, look at doing LED tape lighting. It's very DIY friendly, and you can place it behind the face frame to light up all of the shelves of your cabinets. And, you also need to use it for the needed undercabinet lighting. All of your choices are cozy, but darker. You badly need some light on the actual work surface. Under cabinet lighting will provide that. I'd do without a backsplash right now and anything else on the list in order to get that lighting done. You could do simple inexpensive fluorescents under the cabinets to save money to be able to do the tape lighting for the in cabinet lights.
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narrow mirror and sconces
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