Awkward: When Clients Contact You After Hours
Get tips on setting boundaries to address dinnertime calls, weekend pings and midnight texts
Becky Harris
November 7, 2019
Houzz Contributor. Hi there! I live in a 1940s cottage in Atlanta that I'll describe as "collected."
I got into design via Landscape Architecture, which I studied at the University of Virginia.
Houzz Contributor. Hi there! I live in a 1940s cottage in Atlanta that I'll describe... More
You know the feeling — your phone pings during Sunday brunch and you fill with dread, knowing it’s a client who thinks choosing a faucet finish is a life-or-death decision. Or while you’re catching up on social media just before you nod off to sleep, a client sees that you’re active and slides into your DMs. “It’s taken me many years, and a great sense of self, to finally set solid boundaries with our clients — very hard to do since social media gives the impression that we all never sleep,” says designer Nicole White. Here’s why and how she and other design pros set clear boundaries before a project commences.
Designer Nicole White at home in Florida with her son
Why to Set Boundaries on Business Hours
“It’s so tempting to be available 24/7 — after all, designers are people-pleasers and we love to make clients happy,” says interior designer Kirsten Kaplan. “But as my business has matured, I am a very firm believer that designers need time off — time to be inspired, nurture relationships with friends, spouses and kids, paint or pursue other creative hobbies. It’s essential to being able to give 100% to our clients when we are on the clock.”
White balances work life and family life by sticking to her business hours. “Not everyone is thrilled, and we used to have some pushback, but I’ve stood firm, especially since I became a mom and really needed to focus on being present for my son in the evenings and on weekends,” the designer says.
Why to Set Boundaries on Business Hours
“It’s so tempting to be available 24/7 — after all, designers are people-pleasers and we love to make clients happy,” says interior designer Kirsten Kaplan. “But as my business has matured, I am a very firm believer that designers need time off — time to be inspired, nurture relationships with friends, spouses and kids, paint or pursue other creative hobbies. It’s essential to being able to give 100% to our clients when we are on the clock.”
White balances work life and family life by sticking to her business hours. “Not everyone is thrilled, and we used to have some pushback, but I’ve stood firm, especially since I became a mom and really needed to focus on being present for my son in the evenings and on weekends,” the designer says.
Realize This Is About Respect
Setting boundaries means respecting yourself, your loved ones and your business. Once you realize that, it’s easier to put the rules in place and enforce them. White asks for the same respect she gives other people. “I wouldn’t go to their place of employment and not respect the rules. It’s that simple. These are the processes we have in place. Please respect them to ensure your project runs smoothly,” she says.
And Kaplan has found that setting boundaries inspires respect. “I believe that clients have more respect for the business of design when they realize it’s a legitimate business with hours of operation during which the designer is available,” she says.
Setting boundaries means respecting yourself, your loved ones and your business. Once you realize that, it’s easier to put the rules in place and enforce them. White asks for the same respect she gives other people. “I wouldn’t go to their place of employment and not respect the rules. It’s that simple. These are the processes we have in place. Please respect them to ensure your project runs smoothly,” she says.
And Kaplan has found that setting boundaries inspires respect. “I believe that clients have more respect for the business of design when they realize it’s a legitimate business with hours of operation during which the designer is available,” she says.
Understand the Bad Timing
Knowing how busy her clients are between working and shuttling kids around during the day, Kaplan understands they don’t have time to reflect on design decisions until evenings or weekends. “It makes total sense that clients might want to dash off a quick text when something occurs to them, rather than try to hold off until the next morning or after the weekend,” she says.
Architect Amy Alper is more flexible with weekend time because she likes to make room for a bit of work in her schedule. “I’m happy for clients to send messages when convenient for them — either when a question occurs to them or when they have time. With a residential practice, it is the weekends when the clients are most relaxed and most able to focus,” she says. But she does maintain work-life balance boundaries by receiving and responding to them while in work mode. “Just because a call or email comes in, it does not mean I have to respond on the weekend. That said, often I do, as I often devote a few hours on the weekend for uninterrupted work or management tasks.” This can include a meeting or conference call when she’s willing and able to put it on her schedule, but she does not guarantee weekend availability.
Simply be clear from the start. Tell your clients you understand that they will be thinking about the project during your off hours, but that when it comes to your response time, you’ll have the undistracted focus the project requires during your business hours. And let them know the best method of communication and when to expect a response.
Knowing how busy her clients are between working and shuttling kids around during the day, Kaplan understands they don’t have time to reflect on design decisions until evenings or weekends. “It makes total sense that clients might want to dash off a quick text when something occurs to them, rather than try to hold off until the next morning or after the weekend,” she says.
Architect Amy Alper is more flexible with weekend time because she likes to make room for a bit of work in her schedule. “I’m happy for clients to send messages when convenient for them — either when a question occurs to them or when they have time. With a residential practice, it is the weekends when the clients are most relaxed and most able to focus,” she says. But she does maintain work-life balance boundaries by receiving and responding to them while in work mode. “Just because a call or email comes in, it does not mean I have to respond on the weekend. That said, often I do, as I often devote a few hours on the weekend for uninterrupted work or management tasks.” This can include a meeting or conference call when she’s willing and able to put it on her schedule, but she does not guarantee weekend availability.
Simply be clear from the start. Tell your clients you understand that they will be thinking about the project during your off hours, but that when it comes to your response time, you’ll have the undistracted focus the project requires during your business hours. And let them know the best method of communication and when to expect a response.
Set Rules in a Welcome Letter
White has learned to lay forth her company’s boundaries as early in the process as possible. “When we start a project, we send a welcome letter explaining the overall plan and how we communicate with clients. We send this through Ivy with an approval request so there’s no denying they ever read it, because it must be approved,” she says. The letter states their hours of operation and that all communication will be primarily through email.
These hours of operation are also listed beneath her company’s email signatures as well as a note stating that an email response will be forthcoming within 48 hours. Such a lengthy lag in response time may not be typical but does cover weekend breaks.
White has learned to lay forth her company’s boundaries as early in the process as possible. “When we start a project, we send a welcome letter explaining the overall plan and how we communicate with clients. We send this through Ivy with an approval request so there’s no denying they ever read it, because it must be approved,” she says. The letter states their hours of operation and that all communication will be primarily through email.
These hours of operation are also listed beneath her company’s email signatures as well as a note stating that an email response will be forthcoming within 48 hours. Such a lengthy lag in response time may not be typical but does cover weekend breaks.
Set the Communication Channels
The number of ways to communicate these days can help spiral a project into chaos. For instance, even though your clients originally may have found you on social media, it’s not the best means of communication when you’re keeping track of all design decisions through email or project-management software. Responding to a direct message on social media takes that information outside of your carefully organized system. White’s welcome letter also states that the primary method of communication will be email. “And even if we call or text a client, we send a follow-up email recapping that conversation, because you’ll be amazed at how many times clients deny having a conversation verbally or via text,” she says.
“I do not engage clients in the DMs via Instagram and Facebook. They’ll message me there because they see me being active on social media after hours, but I simply send an email the next day saying, ‘Hey, I saw your DM, but as you know, we only communicate our project details with clients via email or with a scheduled chat,’” White says. “This has become increasingly important, because we see spouses or partners sending DMs to undermine the other partners’ wishes, and we have to nip these things in the bud.”
“I request emails over text messages,” Alper says. “With some clients it is a losing battle. I will only respond via email so I can keep an easy record of the interaction but will text to say an email has been sent in response.”
The number of ways to communicate these days can help spiral a project into chaos. For instance, even though your clients originally may have found you on social media, it’s not the best means of communication when you’re keeping track of all design decisions through email or project-management software. Responding to a direct message on social media takes that information outside of your carefully organized system. White’s welcome letter also states that the primary method of communication will be email. “And even if we call or text a client, we send a follow-up email recapping that conversation, because you’ll be amazed at how many times clients deny having a conversation verbally or via text,” she says.
“I do not engage clients in the DMs via Instagram and Facebook. They’ll message me there because they see me being active on social media after hours, but I simply send an email the next day saying, ‘Hey, I saw your DM, but as you know, we only communicate our project details with clients via email or with a scheduled chat,’” White says. “This has become increasingly important, because we see spouses or partners sending DMs to undermine the other partners’ wishes, and we have to nip these things in the bud.”
“I request emails over text messages,” Alper says. “With some clients it is a losing battle. I will only respond via email so I can keep an easy record of the interaction but will text to say an email has been sent in response.”
Separate Private and Business Mobile Phones
White has a separate business phone, and when she’s done for the day, so is that phone. “I do not speak with clients after hours and shut my work cell off at that appointed hour,” she says. “I had to get a personal cellphone two years ago because, yes, clients are relentless and still push to get you to speak after hours.”
“We are clear with clients that we are not available on weekends or during the evening. On the extremely rare occasion that there is a design emergency outside of normal business hours, we do respond, but not otherwise,” Kaplan says.
While she doesn’t carry two phones, Alper has found ways to keep work in its place. “I do not have a separate phone but will listen to work messages the next day if received after hours,” she says.
White has a separate business phone, and when she’s done for the day, so is that phone. “I do not speak with clients after hours and shut my work cell off at that appointed hour,” she says. “I had to get a personal cellphone two years ago because, yes, clients are relentless and still push to get you to speak after hours.”
“We are clear with clients that we are not available on weekends or during the evening. On the extremely rare occasion that there is a design emergency outside of normal business hours, we do respond, but not otherwise,” Kaplan says.
While she doesn’t carry two phones, Alper has found ways to keep work in its place. “I do not have a separate phone but will listen to work messages the next day if received after hours,” she says.
Enjoy the Benefits of Boundaries
“I think I said a mouthful because I see this getting so out of hand with clients and I see so many designers being afraid to set these boundaries out of fear they’ll lose the client,” White says. But with her rules set firmly in place, her business is booming more than ever.
“Even though we strive to please our clients every day, one of the best things we can do is give ourselves time and space away from this very intensely demanding career,” says Kaplan, who, along with White and Alper, continues to wins Best of Houzz awards for customer service, boundaries and all. “And during our usual office hours, we are able to be fully devoted to the business of design.”
“I think I said a mouthful because I see this getting so out of hand with clients and I see so many designers being afraid to set these boundaries out of fear they’ll lose the client,” White says. But with her rules set firmly in place, her business is booming more than ever.
“Even though we strive to please our clients every day, one of the best things we can do is give ourselves time and space away from this very intensely demanding career,” says Kaplan, who, along with White and Alper, continues to wins Best of Houzz awards for customer service, boundaries and all. “And during our usual office hours, we are able to be fully devoted to the business of design.”
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I had one call at 8 PM with their family on a conference call. I said I'm still at the office becasue I have a dead line to meet, the only reason I answered the phone was becasue I thought you might be one of the people I was working with - they still wanted to have a discussion. They were not the type to ska if this was a good time - we did not do a project together.
Agreed dreamdoctor....those are clear red flags and that's when "I don't think we're a good fit for your project" is the proper response. We always reflect on how those clients would be so difficult for the production crew to work with if they are like that with the design/sales team.
When people don't respect boundaries the likelihood of a completely successful project is small. They are the type of clients that take liberties with the design - they change one (or more) thing(s) "becasue they can" and affect many others unknowingly which disrupts many, many other things domino fashion - usually including cost and not in a good way - just changing something in process usually adds extra cost and complicates many things.
One of our jobs is to pay attention to the clues given us and act accordingly. All too often clients are on their best behavior in the dating phase and their true self comes out in the construction phase.