My birthday is tomorrow! (Am I 35? or is it 53?:) My honey took me shopping & asked me to go over & look at some clothes- later, I finally found him chatting with a woman & laughing with her- I got a little jealous, because, after all, you know- my hubby is a HUNK! As I approached, I saw that he was discussing diamond rings,------ FOR ME! I felt so dumb! They didn't have one big enough- so we are waiting to see if they can get a 1 carat in... ( But guess what- I think it's kinda silly- I can't wear it out in the dirt! ) Anyway- he is the sweetest guy on the face of whole the Earth! I sure think so! kasha77

I asked about changing the quote on the decorating site. Here is the email and answer: We are having a fun discussion about quotes on the home decorating forum. There was a suggestion that gw offer us a new design quote on occasion - the FLW has been up for years! While your at it, how about changing the pic once in a while too? We at home decorating notice that stuff! Here is a link to a site that sends decorating quotes every day: http://www.interiordesignquotes.com/index.html Enjoy the site so much. Thanks! and the response.... Deedee, If you have a picture in mind that belongs to one of the forum members, we can certainly use that picture. You could ask others on the forums for their input. Sincerely, GardenWeb Staff So....anybody want to submit one? Another design quote: Interiors speak. Rooms emphasize whether one simply exists or lives, and there is a great difference between the two. - Van Day Truex

About the used literary classics - our local used book store will take paperbacks ONLY - and give you 25% of value as credit for buying more used books from them. That is why my books went to the library, for their book sale fundraiser. About garage sales - I love GOING to them. However, as soon as I began that, I also recognized that I could never HAVE one. Others have commented on the work - but for me it is something more than that. First of all - if I am selling thing that matters to me at some level - and I finally decide I can part with it for 50 cents, it would just jerk my jaw to have someone offer 25 cents. SO, I see that I don't have what it takes to run a garage sale. When I go, as a buyer, I pay the asking price. Not everyone does that....part of the game for a lot of folks is to see how cheaply they can get an item. I understand that. I just can't "do it" and would hate to have it done to me. The other part has to do w/ the ugly stuff I have seen going on at sales - the folks who walk off w/o paying for items they are carrying. Even worse than that is when the seller is an elderly lady who has no help and who didn't price things ahead of time. Not pricing requires conversation, which slows down the process, and which distracts the seller from the rest of the activity, and which encourages theft by folks who may even justify that by complaining about being held up in a checkout line. Anyone having a sale needs to have LOTS of help. To do it on your own is to invite the lowlife behaviors. Too bad, but true. Now that I am beginning to unclutter and purge, I don't go to the sales the way I did. I still LOVE to "shop" - but at least I don't "buy" as often or as much. Back to the original thread theme - even garage sale items that I have purchased are often hard to "let go". I saw a LOT of my garage sale buying as an attempt to fill up an emotional void in my life. It may not make sense, but the changed feelings brought about by acquistion helped to block the real pain of life losses. The patch, however, IS only temporary. So now I am ripping off the temporary patches and bandages - and trying to get real about who I am, and what it is that I want around me in my living space. SPACE?? Did "I" say that? Do I even know what "space" means? Well, I am learning. Thank you for the great ideas presented here....it all helps so very much! Vicki

Colleen, I think sometimes the biggest help you can offer someone is simply understanding their position without judgement. I don't know the particulars of your situation, but it sounds like you're willing to share in some (perhaps many) of the child-raising duties. Which is great, and may even be an utter necessity depending on how responsible (or not) the BM in your life happens to be... and the DH.... But no matter what actions you're taking to help ---and no matter how great these actions are--- BM will still "bite your hand" if she knows you think of her as "pathetic", which would feel to her like massive insult on top of injury. Again, I obviously don't know all the details involved.... but c'mon... divorce, remarriage and especially 'the new wife" are always a touchy and sensitive set of issues. For anybody. Few women would reach out and hug or worship the woman who's now with the man that could have hurt or rejected them very harshly. Even if your DH isn't a sleazy caricature ---the type to toss out the first wife at mid-life then run out & get a red sportscar and a bimbo half his age--- this caricature exists b/c many men DO end up with younger women in their 2nd marriages. And to make matters worse, these men often "fix the errors of their past" or "become more sensitive and mature" just in time to shower the new wife with all kinds of praise, support, commitment, etc. that the first wife never got b/c when they were married the guy was a young pr!ck who thought he had a lifetime to discard or mistreat women at will or "upgrade" to a newer model as a prize for certain milestones of achievement or bank balance. So the stereotype is that the new wife is treated like a queen, unlike the first wife who scrubbed toilets to help put him thru med school, etc. Even when it's not so callous as this, thing is many men DO mature as they get older and learn how to treat women better and appreciate them more, etc. and the first wife sees this happening and feels like she wasted years of her life she won't get back. It's rough, and just plain not going to be easy for the first wife to think you're the bee's knees. Best case scenario, she will be civil and will have moved on with her own life and might even be really nice to you... But even in the best situations, there is always a small part of any former wife (or girlfriend, whatever) that will make some comparisons, question what you've got that she didn't have, why you "deserve" to be treated well by the same man that treated her like a piece of garabage (at least by the end of the marriage). And if you DO happen to be younger or prettier, it's going to make matters infinitely more strained ---obviously--- if she catches the slightest whiff of you regarding her as a pathetic old bag. Even if she's acting crusty and biting your hand, within yourself you should at least try to empathize with some of her situation. This romance business can be a really rough game for women in general.