What you are describing is a little different from refacing. Refacing usually means new doors and drawer fronts, then covering all the rest with a thin veneer to match. That is where the tedious cutting and finish work comes in. Done right, it looks all new, but can be expensive. It can be done DIY if you are parient and confident re: cutting and gluing veneer. If your buddy's custom oak cabinets were new, that is very different from what you are dealing with. You would have to get the existing finish completely off yours before spraying with stain, AND you would have to match somehow the color on the new wood doors to that on the old wood cases (some woods change color over time). The stripping is an awful job and color matching can be dicey. You are looking at a lot of work. Easiest and least expensive fix would be to clean and prep well, paint them and replace the hardware. Or you could darken the stain with gel coats (see nearby thread). Either could be enough to tide you over indefinitely. Next up in cost would be paint/gel but also replace the doors and drawer fronts. But before going to that expense, consider whether the cabinets are worth pouring that kind of money into. Doors are the major part of cabinet cost. And as was said, IKEA is a great way to go if you are looking at replacement cabinets. Though it sounds like your plate is pretty full...

I gel stained my bathroom cabinets 8 months ago (Probably not as long as you are looking for but I will give you my insights). I also did the handrail down our stairs. I used the java stain. The one bathroom that 3 teenagers use has gotten a few nicks. I've just reapplied some stain over them with a q-tip and it covered fine without being able to tell that it was patched. The hand rail gets used by 5 people everyday and I haven't had any problems. I just wipe it down every so often with a wet cloth. I also did a mirror that must be in a dusty location because it gets dusty very quickly and you can really see it on the java stain. Hopefully that wouldn't be a problem with the walnut stain because if you have a lot of cabinets I would be a pain to have to dust them all of the time. Hope this helps. On another note, I've been researching replacement cabinet doors for our kitchen. Barker Doors has gotten a few good reviews on here and it would cost me around $2000 to redo our cabinets and drawer fronts. We were looking at painted white doors though and planned to paint the cabinets ourselves. Maybe you could buy unfinished doors and then stain everything the color that you wanted? A lot cheaper than totally refacing everything. Cabinetdoorsdepot was the cheapest at around $1000 for everything, but I couldn't find any reviews on here. Where did you get your estimate? If you live near a large city you should be able to find a better deal than the big box stores.

Agree with the others, lovely cabinets, kitchen looks pretty grand in size to me. I wouldn't paint the cabinets anything different than the nice neutral white color they are. I would remove that curvy molding above the sink. I'm not a fan of the passthrough window, but maybe that's useful for you to keep an eye on kiddos, or whatever. Open shelving on the walls? All that wall? Maybe you are super neat, and all your dishware matches and coordinates with everything else you plan to display, but in a busy household, I can't even imagine keeping open shelving look great, especially in a large kitchen like yours. Dust? I like cabinets with doors so my dishes and glasses are never dusty. Also, cabinets with doors hide clutter. I've had wood floors in my kitchen and was glad to change them out for tile, but we have lots of kids and dogs, and no one worries about the floors but me. I wouldn't put wood in a kitchen, but there are many people who have it and like it. If you want a change, paint and backsplash. I really would not worry about making the kitchen appear smaller. That would be tough to do in a nice open space like yours.

I wanted to say a big thank you to everyone who responded, especially live_wire_oak and millworkman. I took both of your advice. I hired a color consultant, per Live_Wire_Oak suggested. The consultant came up with colors for throughout the house, including a lovely creamy white for the majority of the house. Once the walls were painted, we realized that the backsplash needed to change (as Millworkman suggested). Chose a beautiful blue glass subway tile which brought out the blue in the granite and the lighting. We are so pleased with the way the kitchen turned out. Hiring a color consultant was the best $$ we have spent on our house. Thanks everyone!