How do you ask for a raise
4 years ago
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How do you raise the soil in a raised bed?
Comments (5)I know what you mean! It seems like the soil gets used up. I just dig up the plants and replant them after refilling the box to the new level. Obviously, you can't do that if the plants are too fragile to take that kind of treatment as in a nursery bed. I have one bed that I use just for nursery purposes and the level keeps going down and I will have to wait until most of the plants are moved to more permanent quarters to refill that box. My beds are 4 feet across and 6,8 or 12 feet long and filled with compost from my livestock. I don't till or agitate the soil in them but add layers to them sort of like lasagna beds. spiderwoman...See MoreHow do you raise the toilet if your subfloor is higher?
Comments (1)There are toilet flange extenders to take care of that. Search Google shopping for them. The toilet weight rests on the new floor, and the extender slides into the drain to fill the gap....See MoreTween - how do you say you don't want to be BFFs when someone asks?
Comments (32)Different people use the word "friend" differently, so a lot of this is semantics. I tend to extend "friend" much more broadly than my husband, who has zero people he considers friends. But the lesson is what is necessary to be successful in group situations--manners and civility, which seem to be on the wane in today's society, but I don't think that is a good thing or something I would want my kid to emulate. I have this argument with my husband all the time, knowing what is and is not appropriate to say in group settings. I grew up in a small town, I learned early on to avoid gossip and trash talking anyone, ever. You never know you might be speaking to their cousin or brother-in-law!! :) My grandmother survived in her tiny village in Poland during World War I because she could get along with all sides in the conflict and smuggle resources into her town to keep people alive . . .Hence I grew up with an emphasis of not making enemies although also was taught to have principles and to stand up for them . . . just do so in a way as to not alienate those around me . . . easier said than done . . . Look at all the people who are suffering because of snarky things they have said publicly. I am in the camp that says best to err on the side of civility which is not the same thing as agreeing or supporting things that clash with your values. It's just a matter of knowing how to chose your battles. A good life would not be a constant battle ground, but it is for some people. I would definitely want my child to learn to find some ways to develop inner strength/peace/serenity or whatever the right word is. It's a life long struggle. My Mom's mantra was the "Serenity Prayer." But of course no matter how many times we discussed this concept, it never totally went away because that's life. However, my mother was quite successful professionally because she learned to overlook certain things and just keep moving forward, not get bogged down by drama. As a teacher and person who gives public program and raises money, I had to learn to never, ever speak ill of anyone, it just isn't worth it, life is long, people and circumstances change, one never knows. On the one hand. But on the other hand, if the hitting bothered your daughter and she asked her friend to stop and she didn't, they you daughter has every right to distance herself from that behavior. I would just advise your daughter not to rush to put people in the "friend/not friend" category. Just treat all people with dignity but also you can detach from the drama that troubled people might bring into your life. This is not the strong suit of a teenager, but a good skill to develop. Otherwise, your life could be much more stressful if you don't learn techniques for tamping down interpersonal drama in your life. One has to be able to do what my Mom advised, not make other people's problems your own. You have to be able to be in this world, experience the drama, but not get pulled into it. A good technique is to focus on projects and actions, not personalities. A tough balancing act, one that teenagers have to learn to navigate and it can be tough even for adults. Trust is tricky. There's a whole other dynamic too, being liked vs being a doormat vs being mean and unlike-able. It's just a balancing act we all have to perform . . . Detachment has not been my strong suit, and I've often wondered if it is possible to develop more of it or if it is just in your genes . . . vs passion . . . and then when to hold it and when to play it ???...See MoreHow do you ask guests to take their shoes off?
Comments (50)I am married to a person from a country in which shoes are never worn in the house. Once the habit is ingrained in you, it's not a big deal. We have hard-soled shoes for ourselves (mine are Birkenstock) that are our "inside" shoes; we kick off the outside shoes and slip on the inside shoes in the mudroom, it's automatic, don't even think about it. His friends ALWAYS kick off their shoes at the door, don't even have to ask, they wouldn't dream of walking around in someone's house with outside shoes. We do have a basket of slippers of all sizes that we put out when people are coming over. My family is another story -- for some of them they just do it, either use our slippers or bring their own, others don't and I don't push it. But, I do go around the house mopping like a mad woman as soon as they leave. Who knows what they've cr*p (figurative and literally) they've tracked in. I never ask contractors to take their footwear off. It is part of their work attire, how would you feel if someone asked you to take off part of your uniform? It's not only for their safety but mine -- I don't want to get sued because they stepped on a nail or banged and broke their toe or whatever because I asked them to remove their shoes. But yea I go around with the mop again ASAP LOL!...See More- 4 years agolast modified: 4 years ago
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