Best of luck! and may the force be with you!

You’ve got this!

You don't need luck! You've got a smart head on your shoulders and a kind heart. You've got this!

This is a new beginning. You've worked hard to get here in more ways than one. Enjoy the experience. As eld & Allison said, "you've got this".

Allison said it all. Go do good things.

Thanks for all of the encouragement!!

Thank goodness there are people like you willing to take on these challenges, AKT. There is a lucky client out there who has you on their case.

You go girl! Team AKT will be cheering you on!

We know how much good you will bring these clients-they are so fortunate to have you guiding them! Your coworker can learn from you if that is an option.

Suero My son would have replied "How about them Mets!" But you can substitute any sports team. Just change the subject to something meaningless. And congratulations on your new job

Then I'd be trapped in a discussion about sports.... which I try to avoid at all costs!!!

But I get your point; change the topic!

@cawaps, your video clip just showed up for me in this thread. That is my sister’s favorite line: I’m older and have more insurance! HA!

I keep thinking about this thread -- not because of the co-worker. I know you will do fine there. But I wonder how the work is starting out for you. I did children's rights advocacy in law school and it has always been an interest for me. I hope you will find it challenging and rewarding. It takes a special person to do the job well. I think you;re up to it.

Las, to be honest I have never been more stressed. It is so much work. Everyone tells me it is the hardest job anyone can have. I can definitely see that now that I am really getting into it.

I am hoping to get a handle on it and get into the swing of it. I am new so I try to cut myself some slack but it is not coming easy to me. I think about quitting everyday. I am trying to take one day at a time. My mentor who is to help me and guide me is not very hands on so it makes it that much harder.

Wish me luck because I'm going to need it!!

AKT, one of my cousins has worked in CPS for about a decade.

She said she thinks about quitting every day.

I agree with taking it one day at a time and cutting yourself some slack. It is a wicked hard job and even under the best, most perfect circumstances the amount of stress involved is incredibly high.

If it turns out this isn't the job for you, you are still getting incredibly valuable experience. Plus it may make it easier to transfer to other job openings within the county/state for you.

Thanks Patrice! Honestly, I have talked to so many ppl who have convinced me this job will ruin my mental health. My mental health is not the best to start with so, I can see what they mean. I will keep working and also looking into other possibilites. There is no work/life balance with this job. I can not afford the stress and toll it will take on me. I am already nearing my threshold and I am not even through training yet.

Thanks for sharing with me. Kudos to your cousin!!!

I do wish you all the best, but I also have to be honest with you and tell you I decided not to pursue that course after graduation. It surprised me, but I could tell I could not do it long term at that point in my life. I left the door open, but never went back. The problems and the responsibility were overwhelming then, but I expect it is only worse now. Take a cue from Simone Biles -- take care of you first. You cannot help others if you do not.

I will also be very honest and tell you that I have been surprised that you have not worked in design or interiors. Have you not considered it? You seem to have a knack for it.

I clipped this from someone's Twitter; important to remember.

"Honestly, I have talked to so many ppl who have convinced me this job will ruin my mental health. My mental health is not the best to start with so, I can see what they mean. I will keep working and also looking into other possibilites. There is no work/life balance with this job. I can not afford the stress and toll it will take on me. I am already nearing my threshold and I am not even through training yet."

If what you say is true (and of course it is) please reconsider this position. There is NO SHAME in trying something new only to discover it is not a good fit. I can imagine that trying to do the job but having it get the best of you (however long that might take) will be much harder on you than deciding at this point that this is not a good fit.

I worked for years in a legal aid office and also as an advocate for women and children survivors of domestic violence; we worked closely with CPS and children's advocates in other agencies. It takes a special type of person with very good and firm boundaries to not be eaten alive by the tragedy that you will see. Helping children and families is gratifying beyond belief, but this job is overwhelming for anyone. Someone as kind and gentle and who is a "helper" as you appear to be, might find herself drowning in grief about the things you will learn and hear and see. It can be very difficult to watch vulnerable people suffer and to not let their problems become your problems - to not feel responsible for fixing all the wrongs you will see.

If you're having doubts, consider stepping back while you reconsider.

Las, md and Oly,

Yes, this job is all consuming. It is not only the heartbreaking things I will have to see (as I have yet to see them)... but the amount of time you put into this job. It is beyond demanding and given everything is so urgent (danger to children) - you are left feeling stressed and thinking about the job 24/7. It is as if you never have the time to catch a breath.

I am constantly in a state of high alert and anxiety. I am not sleeping well and have not even had the time to eat during the day unless it is a breakfast bar on the go. You drive hundreds of miles to all parts of the city and the paperwork is never ending and brutal.

I am not cut of for it. However, I need to stick with it as long as I can until I find something else.

Thanks for letting me vent! Funny this all started as my co-worker was rude! lol

Las, my friends ask me the same question about doing something in design as well. I have no formal experience and I can not imagine how to even get into it. If I was able to do so, I would not make enough money to support myself. I have also thought that doing something i love as a hobby would then change it into more of chore if I had to make a living doing it. I think having to do it would suck the joy out of it. If that makes any sense...

You could possibly combine design with personal shopping and organizing. It is definitely a career. And helping people with housework. My former landlady/friend also has a knack for home design, and she is a household assistant. She helps elderly people, upper middle class people who need help with a second home and are gone a lot, and people who are dealing with an chronic illness in the family, and just folks who could use the help. She keeps very busy. There is a high demand for this type of work. You have to deal with grumpy people,. but only one client at a time and most people get by with a handful of regulars.

There is absolutely no question that if you are in social services you have to be able to establish firm boundaries and have thick skin and detach. You will not necessarily always be supported and often not liked. IT'S NOT YOU. It's human nature.

There are jobs like yours that will eat you alive if you do not do as pink mentions - set boundaries and accept that you can only do so much. No matter how much time and effort you expend there will always be more you think needs to be done. You'll never do it all. You realize this isn't going to work out so just do what you can without sacrificing your own health and well being. You are your first priority.

Most employers offer an "employee assistance program" that provides free (albeit limited) access to counselors; you may want to look into that.

DF got into design working as salesperson for LazyBoy, they sent her to design school and she worked her way up in the company.

Take care of .

I very recently learned a great response to rude remarks meant to 'bait' you or make you angry: just smile and say "Whatever", and move or look away.

I was in a small group of retirees led by a person I now believe is a narcissist. She was a heavy drinker, and did at least 75% of the talking. When I spoke up and tried to make comments, she would get very annoyed....almost angry.

I watched some youtube videos on dealing with difficult personalities, and the "Whatever" comment was suggested, since it is not hostile, and you can remember it when needed (I can never think of something clever to say when insulted!.) It worked.

I have stopped interacting with that group.....but you can't do that at work, and don't want to be drained by an emotional terrorist. Hope you can find a way to not be drawn into emotional drama on the job.

“whatever” is a very passive-aggressive response that can just as easiky backfire.

@amykath I'm so sorry you are feeling this way about your new position but it is completely understandable. I hope you can find an exit ramp soon as I agree with others that you, your helath and happiness are paramount right now.

I know we have all chimed in on career paths in the past and a few of us have mentioned higher education positions (advising, student affairs, etc.) as a possible good fit for you. What mdln described about her DF working in retail/sales seems to also be a good suggestion. On a recent shopping trip, I saw a number of places like Pottery Barn, Ballard Designs, etc. advertising for full-time employment. I'm sure there are any number of ways for you to use your knowledge and talent in home decorating in "design adjacent" fields. From what I am able to "know" about you from this forum, I have no doubt you would be an asset to any number of design/decor/furniture organizations.

Take care of yourself and keep us posted on developments. We are all on "Team Amy"!

I understand the feeling that doing something for money could suck all the fun out of it. I've spent most of my life having those feelings off and on with cooking and baking.

As for decorating, one path would seem to be starting with retail furniture or home improvement. I'm sure that even pre-covid, not all of those required degrees -- some furniture places may have wanted them for some positions, but customers want solid advice that makes sense. The other day, I googled interior design jobs in Austin and saw lots of listings. Most wanted degrees and experience, but some mentioned finishing your degree while working (hopefully not an unpaid internship!), one appeared to be retail furniture and one was kitchen cabinet sales. Macy's, Arhaus, Pottery Barn, Star, Basset would be places to start, but you probably have local options on top of that. Worst case, you could sell some furniture or any kind of home decor and talk to people about color and design choices and things you enjoy while you figure out your next step. It should help your mental health rather than damage it. It just hurts me to read where you are right now. You deserve better.

Don't rule out personal assistant which might include organizing too. As I mentioned, I have a friend who does that. There is a class of people who can afford and are always looking for a good PA. Once you start with one, and if you do well, you will soon be turning down work through word of mouth. That's how it goes for my landlady. She's easing out of it due to age. That's just when some wealthier people are easing in to wanting a PA, they know what they want but don't have the energy anymore. My Mom started to pay her house cleaner to also garden for her, for example. Worked out fine, they both liked gardening.

Thanks everyone! I am keeping an open mind. My supervisor tore into me about a piece of documentation I had missed on a client visit. Something just snapped in me and I told her that I am simply not suited for this kind of work (no one is really). It wasn't so much a snap.... but the straw that broke the camel's back. I wanted to try and continue working until I found something else but my stress levels were causing me to have panic attacks.

I couldn't have my health deterioate any further. I was terrified I might at any point truly have a nervous breakdown. I have always thought that term was so strange and foreign to me and never understood it. Sadly, now I do understand it. I did not have one, but I was getting too close.

I have a fairly good amount of money in the bank to tide me over for a while. Heck, after this job anything will be better.....not to mention they were taking out almost 10% of my paycheck for retirement. As if I could work there into retirement!

Again, I want to say thank you all from the very bottom of my heart. I know I have written about so many of my personal struggles on here. I do it because I know you guys are a safe space and are never judgemental and nothing but supportive and helpful beyond words. I really love you guys!! I would be lost if I did not have this wonderful group of amazing people.

Sorry to hear about all the negative experiences you have endured in this position. I hope you can find a path that you truly love. You do have so much to offer. I have faith that the way will become clear to you as you continue on your journey. Take care of yourself. We're all rooting for you!

amy, i am so sorry this job did not work out. you did the right thing by taking care of you and your mental health. the right job is out there and you will find it!!

Good for you! I am bummed things didn't work out, but happy you were able to take care of yourself.

Amy, I'm glad you stood up for yourself and got out before things got worse. I know I couldn't do that job -- or any job with broken things I could not hope to ever fix, especially when children's lives are at issue. That's not anything wrong with you. I'd call it a strength, not a weakness. Maybe snarky girl did you a favor by giving you something you needed to vent about so we could be there for you.

Enough of that -- let's move on to the next chapter. Start a new thread when we can help you in that next chapter. No need to rehash this one.

It takes guts to walk away from an untenable situation.....you are a strong person! Your happiness and emotional health are worth more than a paycheck.

You will find your way, strong woman!

((((Hugs))))

I had not responded because by the time I saw the thread everyone had covered what I would have posted. Re quitting—-you did the right thing. I retired earlier than I had originally planned because I was miserable going into the office everyday. There were some aspects I liked, but not enough to tough it out longer. When you wake up in the morning and dread the day ahead, it’s time to make a change. You’ll figure it out!

Thanks everyone! I feel somewhat guilty for resigning. However, I am probably 1 in 2 that do. Now, to find something else.

So sorry this didn't work out, Amy, but your own mental health is primary. It is far better you found out in the early days of the job rather than trying to tough it out. That took guts, and I wish you the best in the future.

Congrats for resigning. It is an extremely difficult job to handle. Like you said you are always on call, never ending documentation, etc. It's almost like they set you up for an uphill battle. No job is worth your physical and mental health. I hope you will step into the best job for you in the near future.

So sorry to learn that this hasn't worked for you. Is this the only agency/program doing such work where you are? Might there be another nonprofit helping kids that isn't so stressful?

Now is a good time to find a job. Lots of openings. Even something that is below your training and skill level will be good to just get out and bring in some dollars. I'm still working on my sabbatical projects or I would have answered the "help wanted" ad at our local coffeeshop in a heartbeat. I've always wanted to be trained to be a barista . . . You might consider some home babysitting, lots of people with kid issues needing some help . . .

I’m sorry the job didn’t work out for you, your health should always come first.

I was speaking with a neighbor (holds a Corporate position) who says that her company is struggling to find employees throughout the country. Many positions are work from home, many are 4 day work week Employees have great health insurance, tuition assistance for continuing education and a generous vacation package. Anyway, when you are ready, look into USAA Insurance and see if something there would fit you.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

You tried. Now you've learned even more. The right fit is out there waiting for you

Now is when Williams Sonoma starts hiring work-from-home customer service agents for the holiday season, I think. Look at this job post. It may not be your life work, but it might tide you over until you find what you want to do. The biggest plus is 40% employee discount at W-S family of stores. I’d spend up everything I made!

https://wsgc.applicantstack.com/x/detail/a2qgk7jr5ilh

Thanks guys for your continued support and great ideas! I am planning on finding something that is not my dream job to make money. I am trying to find a remote position mainly bc of this new Delta varient.

I just read an article about employers in desperate need of workers. Hopefully, that will make this easier. At least that is on my side!

I'm new to this thread so.....regarding your original post: that woman was RUDE. 48 is young if you take care of yourself. sounds like you're already good at mental self-care -- such as standing up for yourself and knowing when to call it quits. I'm glad you did. fingers crossed that the next job is a better fit! and even if id doesn't wind up being the best, sometimes these things can lead to you figuring out what you do want to do. or maybe you'll make new friends. I wish you the best!

Thanks Seattle! Funny thing, I’ve always wanted to live in Seattle. I have been considering finding a job in another state. I live in Texas and nearly everyday I hear something that makes me say ”I’m living in the wrong state” I Honestly don’t feel like I belong here. Anyhoo....

If you're at all liberal, you will very likely be happier here. (I know Texas-- my family originates from there. I love it but would not want to live there.) However the cost of housing in Seattle is extremely high, and the homeless problem has been bad lately (it was getting bad pre-covid, but now it's way worse). Not a big problem in some neighborhoods, but others have tent encampments all over the place. I hope it's temporary, but for now it feels like it's never going to end. There's also the concept of the "Seattle Freeze" (look it up), so it can be rough on newcomers sometimes.

But this city is really beautiful. I grew up in Albuquerque and moved here 20 years ago to escape the desert, and never looked back. My favorite thing is how each neighborhood is kind of like a small town ("urban villages"), with very few strip malls, etc. It's charming as hell.

Another similar place to consider is Portland Oregon. It's a lot like Seattle but is a little smaller, more affordable, with better public transit, and is (supposedly) friendlier. I want to live there so bad, but my husband and I are pretty firmly rooted here for a while.

Yes, i know Seattle fairly well during all of the seasons. i lived with my ex-husband for a short while at his home in Queen Anne. it was walking distance to Freemont i loved Freemont.

i am liberal and not a ”country” ”hunting” ”gun owner” type person like many ppl i know. Not to imply everyone in Texas is.

I will look into Portland.

Just west of Portland is the "Silicone Forest" (Washington County) with many high-tech companies and Nike headquarters. I moved here by myself sight unseen from California exactly twenty years ago yesterday.