Yep, paint colors really seem to lighten up in the outside so I would suggest looking at a black color that has a grey undertone to get what you want. If your dark greys are looking too light on your house then you should get the same effect picking a black with a grey undertone. Sorry I don't have any colors to suggest.

It really depends like Color Zen said. Pictures would help. Personally, I love navy. It's a color while also being a neutral and it works well with warm and cool colors.

Color on top left of door is S/W Gyser Steam and I’m wondering if it’s actually closer to the color of house in the photo I attached. Color swatch on right is Comfort Gray.

Thanks all! I now have a massive collection of paint chips and am no further along toward a decision! I'm not sure if the online mockups are all that helpful - when I find images of exteriors with the various paint options, they seem to look very different than the chips or the online mockups. For example, the mock-up and the paint chip makes SW Iron Ore seem very dark - almost black - but this old thread from Houzz shows it painted on a house that looks blue-grey to me. I'll probably try testing some samples once they get the siding up. The problem for me is narrowing it down to 3 or 4 options. I have trouble making decisions in general and this reno has forced me to make about a billion so far. @debvanatl I like Witching Hour as well but a few photos make it look a little "brighter" than I think our little house can bear. @celerygirl I started out wanting just a darker version of our existing color but now I'm tipping over into blue. Still want to keep it dark and grey-toned though. @Tiny J your house is beautiful! Charcoal gray is now in contention. @littlebug zone 5 Missouri & @PPF new gutters and a new portico are part of the plan. And the new windows will be double-hung 6/1, at least a foot taller than the existing windows.