Okay, now that you've explained all that, I think I understand. I live in a open plan and everyone still crowds into the kitchen! I am a believer that function comes first and form should follow. You'll end up with a hybrid look, but it will be better for living I am sure. I was also thinking how nice it is that the sink and DW will be right there. We have a similar set-up from the patio, we can pass dishes through a sliding window right onto the sink deck. It's great. Getting back to your original questions...I don't know a lot about soapstone, but I think if you can find a "clean" one it will be okay. You mean for in the kitchen, right? I was thinking about wood for the bar surface. Then as I read back, I think you have already considered that. Don't rule out quartz, btw. Not sure why you don't like granite...maybe just because you love soapstone! Also, do get a quote on custom (not the brand...the concept!) because it might price out better than you think and you'll get exactly what you want. Maybe you can make a trade-off somewhere. Contractors in some areas are slow with the decline in the market. People I know have been getting fast service and better prices. I think the biggie is finding fridge panels and slab doors that really look nice with your DR furniture. Counter material is less important IMO. I don't like the white as much as I like the Custom doors...wood with black, especially for the fridge. Mixing in some painted black units could give you the unfitted look suggested above. And maybe you could even find frameless cabs to paint black to go with whatever you have to do to get the black/wood look on some of them. (Yes, leave it to me to make things as difficult as possible!) Have you thought about color? I know Allison's F&B French Gray appeals to you. Maybe there is a color in the Bird of P fabric you could use, a dark gray/green or something. Often, one way to ease a style transition is through color. Like even when the style is different (a less formal kitchen) if there is a color connection, it makes sense to the eye/brain on a deeper level. I do it all over my house...because I have no style! ;-) One last thing to think about... I am a huge fan of frameless cabs and will never "go back" if I don't have to. But, I also find that I can get along fine with very little in the kitchen in the way of food and equipment. I have satellite storage (pantry shelves in the nearby laundry room and a linen closet I borrowed for seldom used dishes, candles, napkins, etc.) and find I really only need about 20-30% of what I have (equipment and food) on a daily basis. Just something to think about...aesthetics vs. storage. Which matters the most, etc...

We had a lot of issues that could have been avoided if I had been there every day, all day. THen again, if I were able to be there every day, all day, I probably could have figured out how to be a decent GC myself. But we both work full time and have young kids so our lives are occupied from 6 am to 10 pm every day with work and childcare. I stopped by the house every night, often with a kid in tow, and tried to see what was happening. This often meant that I caught things after the fact, and had to decide whether something was worth changing or not. The more critical issue is that I didn't have a lot of experience in remodeling, hadn't been planning a remodel for years (unlike some people here) and didn't know just how many decisions there would be to make. I think planning in advance exactly what you want and being proactive about communicating is important (so now I really know how to do a remodel, I just don't want to ever again!). in terms of critical days, I would say counter top installation. I made our fabricator come back and recut the counters after a less than optimal seam. i also think being there for any kind of structural work is good--verifying that walls are being properly supported with temporary supports, etc. We had a very bad experience there!

Not a kitchen forum regular, I popped in to search for topics on the insinkerator instant hot water/filtered water dispensers (specifically looking for reasons ours might have needed replacement twice in less than ten years) and found this topic. We did a cosmetic update of our kitchen about ten years ago and replaced the tumbled marble tile backsplash with subway tile with a wide grout line. Our tiler, a woman in her 70's, came up with a pretty good way to finish off the backsplash going past the cabinets in a tricky corner: The photo is horrible quality---cell phone ten years ago. Eagle eyes will see a very tiny strip of green wall between the door moulding and the cabinets. This has since been painted the cabinet color :-)

@ SapphireStitch While it would be nice to wave a magic wand with an unlimited checkbook - I don't have that. I do have access to some money (got a HELOC). If some of the changes need to be done in stages and can be done effectively - we can do that, because the more money I have to pull upfront from the HELOC, the more I'll end up paying in interest. (yuck). I'm also not averse to acting as my own general contractor/project manager, if needed; I've done that before (successfully) But I'd rather not have to overall manage the project, just because my current employment is a boatload more demanding than my previous employment. The nice thing is that we don't have a defined deadline where "this must be done by" - no one is getting married, boatloads of relatives aren't coming to visit, etc. However, the kitchen as it currently stands is a source of daily irritation. We're getting to the point that if anyone is already in the kitchen, we try to avoid going in there until that person has left the kitchen. Tempers flare....we've got my boyfriend (who was envisioning a quiet, child-free retirement), my teenager (while she's not as much of a drama queen as some teens - she's just starting the teenage years, LOL), and me - frustrated as the primary food purchaser, preparer, organizer, clean-up person. And if my boyfriend happens to suddenly realize his blood sugar has dropped - get the hell out of the way in the kitchen. He's not very good at listening to his body - he literally passed out one time when his blood sugar dropped too low - he dashed into the kitchen, grabbed a glucerna and the last thing he remembered was opening it up - but he woke up on the floor sitting in a puddle of the stuff. (I wasn't home at the time). When either I or my teen are in the kitchen and if boyfriend does the mad dash into the kitchen - we pretty much have to drop what we are doing so he can grab something and while he stands there and he starts shoveling whatever down his throat. And since the space is so tight - it can mean leaving stuff cooking on the stove, etc. One time he dashed in, grabbed a breakfast sandwich out of the refrigerator, yanked what was already cooking in the microwave out, and threw his sandwich in. Anyhow, I digress. I know that some of the things we want are going to be big-ticket items - new cabinets, granite or quartzite countertops, slide-in induction stove. That's why I'm also looking for cost-efficient plans, such as instead of moving the sink to the middle of the room, let's keep it on the same wall and just shorten the distance from the hot water heater to the new sink location. Let's not blow out any of the exterior walls, and we can keep the current windows, dishwasher, and refrigerator. If replacing the 10'x13' current laminate would be cheapest to match new hardwood to the existing hardwood, rather than ripping it all out and putting tile down in a 20'x13' space, I'm fine keeping hardwood. If a nice, medium-stain maple cabinet is cheaper than white painted cabinets, I'm find with the the stained version... I prefer it, personally. Rather than a huge pantry cabinet, if building a pantry closet with adjustable shelves is cheaper, I'm fine with that (plus with all the small appliances and bulk-purchases from Costco and BJ's - I think it would suit our storage needs better). If getting an island fits the layout, but is out of reach - I'm fine holding off on installing island cabinets and countertop and using a kitchen table in the meantime. And because we don't have a "get it done by" date... once I have a really solid design/layout... I have the time to shop different cabinet lines and stoves, wait for sales and then to be ready to capitalize on hopefully a decent deal. I don't know if it's true, but I did see some articles that indicate the best time to shop for kitchen cabinets is November to early January.