I don't mean to beat a dying horse, but ... ? re our cooking vent prob
IdaClaire
3 years ago
last modified: 3 years ago
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IdaClaire
3 years agolast modified: 3 years agoIdaClaire
3 years agoRelated Discussions
how do I deal with well-meaning people?
Comments (13)I so understand what your feeling. While I myself did not lose a child my daughter did just a few weeks ago. Her baby girl (leah Rose) was due any day. My daughter went to her last appointment and the doctors could find no heartbeat. We were all stunned to hear the news...just a day before we were feeling the baby kick. She endured 12 hours of induced labor. The doctors could find no medical reason why it happened....prebirth SIDS they call it. To look in my daughter eyes and see the pain when she held her "sleeping" angel was more then I could bare, how was she going to stand it? People tell her oh you can have another one...she can't, her husband had a vasectomy. Or they say well just be glad you have other children...it doesn't make you miss the one you lost any easier. Or as my stupid ex husband told her...well you didn't want to have another baby anyway. True, she was upset when she found out she was pregnant again but that didn't mean she didn't love this baby. People often say well it happened for a reason, my daughter wants to know what was the reason then? Or when people tell her she's with god or a loved one in heaven...that doesn't help either...she wants the baby to be with her. If god didn't want her to have a baby why did she get pregnant in the first place. My daughter works in a bank and all of the customers knew she was pregnant...she dreaded having to go back and have everyone keep askin how's the baby? Or I am so sorry. Or it's gods will. She said each time it was like reliving the experience all over again. It's very emotional, I know and I have no easy answers for you. Some people don't mean to come off hurtful,they just don't know of a way to comfort you. You will have bad days and good days for a quite a while. Like another poster offered....if you'd like to chat email me. Tammy...See MoreCan I vent about not having a vent? WWYD to update?
Comments (23)I like my cooktop a bit closer to my sink and on the same counter run so I don't have to carry wet, drippy things across my floor. So I'm not sure I'd like that. I go back-and-forth between sink and cooktop frequently so the longer trek would bug me. If you go with that plan, I can see the peninsula becoming the major prep area instead of the back counter. If you find that's true for you, you will want to move the DW to the other side of the sink. I do think that long, uninterrupted back counter would make a great baking center. But I also think moving the wall ovens next to fridge (or removing them and replacing cooktop with range) would give you better advantages and still give you a baking center. I like Palimpsest's idea better. Again, YMMV....See MoreFIL is dying...and I don't care
Comments (52)Hi, I know this comes a little “after the fact”, but please don’t blame yourself at all for not grieving for your FIL. You love and loved your husband, which is lots more than I can say. I THOUGHT I loved my husband before we were married, but by the time we got married, I didn’t want to marry him anymore. You’re probably wondering “Why in the world would she get married, anyhow?” Well, the truth is, my husband was a very violent person (which I found out before the marriage) and I was AFRAID to not marry him. He controlled people with fear. I actually feared for my life, and I did so many times while we were married. My mother even saw how bad it was (God rest her soul) and offered to pay for a divorce for me (and she was a “tightwad”). Of course, I refused. What would I tell my husband if he asked me where I got the money for a lawyer, “My mother gave it to me”? He would have outright killed her or threatened her fiercely with profane language. I could go on and on about this—there were so many terrifying incidents. But when he passed away last July, I felt like “the weight of the world was lifted off my shoulders” and we were married nearly 50 years. I could not cry at his funeral because of all the HORRID things he did to me. But he was like a “Jeckll and Hyde”, a split personality, as he had many friends who thought he was GREAT. He did always help them and fixed things for them (he was unusually handy), so it is to be expected. In his fits of rage, he broke everything that was important to ME. I made stained glass pieces (I did very well at that) and he broke the two lamps that I had in the house. I also had two organs (I loved to play them but I wasn’t that good) and he broke keys on both by flinging objects at them. He didn’t break my stained glass windows because it would have been too obvious to other people. So please hang in there, I’m sure things with your husband will get better over time. Wishing for a quick passing is one of the kindest things he could do....See More"Don't Surprise Me" -- A Vent
Comments (53)The vent helped. Your comments helped. This was a hard lesson for me. I've accepting my DH's first response -- which was pretty much the same as Jim's in the very first reply here. It's Good-bye and Never Again! There is no benefit for me in having any further contact with this gal. More 'stuff' keeps turning up: There are faint paw prints on our mattress pad. (I'd made the bed up fresh and covered dust-covered it before we left.) By going outside, I can see scrapes where dog scratched at the porch and French door screens -- before breaking through them. Branches were 'planted'. I evidently needed these 'last straws' to give up my wishful trust. My guess is that House-sitter is leaving town. She had said her mother was planning to remarry and sell the house here. She's probably moving downtown. It's where *normal* single adults live. Calling a locksmith. Changing the entry code on the garage doors. Hoping nothing serious is yet to be discovered....See Morededtired
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