overwhelmed remodel mom
5 years ago
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Stay at home mom - OR - working mom - what is your choice??
Comments (26)Are you a stay-at-home mom? Yes If so, a) what age was your child(ren) when you began to stay home with them? since birth. I graduated nsg school 6 days before she was born but I've never put it to use YET why do you chose to stay home with your children? I find being at home keeps me very busy & fulfilled. I've never understood SAHM who claim they are bored. I have 1 daughter, 3 dogs, a home & my husband's business I do much of the work for plus I made sure to start involving myself & my daughter in school & plenty of activities. Gosh if I never have to work I would be so happy BUT chances are that when the last of my kids is in fulltme school I'll at last work part-time. are you financially secure enough to be home and not work? Like everyone else we could always use the extra $. We don't have a retirement a/c set up, we have to buy our own very expensive health ins., we havn't been on a great vacation in several yrs, we no longer go to fancy dinners, our home could use allot more remodeling, our cars are old but in good condition & paid for & I am always comparison shopping BUT we have no debt despite every month praising when we've paid the last bills. Our daughter is in private school & already takes 4 sets of lessons at age 3 & when we have our day trips or do happen to go out we truly go all out & enjoy, plus since I have no family help at all I have been lucky enough to be able to pay for a mothers helper or sitter for those times I need to catch up on the home, errands or the business paperwork or go to my many medical appts (I was diagnosed with MS a yr ago). All in all I'm happy, but my husband is self employed & he'd like to make a switch right now & he can't b/c we don't have enough $ in the bank nor another income. I had a stay at home Mom when I grew up & feel there is nothing better. I think that while kids are young I prefer being aorund for safety & to be involved in all the firsts, then they start activities & who else is going to chaperone them everywhere & then later on I want to be around so they have support & hopefully I can prevent them from making some bad choices that they might make had they not had any parent at home during the day after school. what are the ages and gender of your kids? daughter age 3 & working on #2 Michie...See MoreI'm tired and overwhelmed!
Comments (25)Early, quiet morning here and as I read, it takes me right back to the feeling of chaos that seemed to prevail during our remodel. Whole house really -- as of today there is not a room that will not have been "touched" in some way, not including the three level addition that had to be situated just so to "save" two beloved trees on our property. My GC just kept shaking his head at that one -- they are right next to the house and whenever the guys were working they would jokingly say -"Lord, don't throw anything out the windows, you know, you might hit a tree." We began in July, estimated finish date was Nov. -- last install went in 2 DAYS AGO! I spent yesterday madly unpacking boxes, just b/c I wanted to see our stuff again! While we had a fabulous GC, it did not lessen the pressure of making the "right" decision every single day for something. I was here most of the time and saw it all in minute detail, then my beloved DH would come home from work and say, "So, what DID they do today?" and expected a re-hash of each and every thing, wanted an updated timeline on a daily basis, wanted me to enlighten him on what "process" I used for each decision, etc. I finally said, "Look, you and I have talked this to death, I know what is important to you and you are just going to have to TRUST that it will happen." I was so exhausted at the end of every day that it was like re-living it all over again. He finally got it, and I tried hard to give him the Reader's Digest condensed version on a regular basis. I eventually convinced him we were going to be on the "holiday" schedule -- nope, not hosting Thanksgiving dinner at our house; there will be no Christmas office celebration here - unless they don't mind unzipping the plastic wall to view our Charlie Brown tree in the roped off corner of the family room; New Year's is out; Valentine's will be an intimate affair; St. Patty's Day will have to be celebrated next year; April's Fools' - yep we can do that, b/c there have been definite times during this that I have been a complete fool -- embrace it, just don't expect there to be any furniture to sit on; Easter Brunch for the relatives - nope, not happening; Mother's Day - not too sure about that, but we CAN celebrate the fact that the Port-A-Potty has been loaded up and carted away, the dumpster vacated the premises the next day, and the plastic storage POD that has graced our front yard since October has been emptied and removed! All furniture is piled in the front room, but at least it is IN THE HOUSE! A parent of a teammate on my son's lacrosse team asked me last week -- "We had such a great time at that picnic/party at your house at the end of the season last year -- do you think we could do that again?" "Um, let's see," she thinks to herself, "last game May 9th and you would like to do it that afternoon and....have families and sibs of everyone included - hhmm, back yard/field is currently a sea of red clay, boxes and furniture stacked to the ceiling to unpack/organize, but.....bathrooms work, kitchen is functional --- Oh, why not -- let's do it!" Nothing like a deadline to work toward, right? Hang in there -- it is so hard to see the forest for the trees when you are in the midst, but, it is not eternal damnation, although I know it feels that way at times! Hug your husband, partner, kids, pet, neighbor, grocery clerk, mailman -- whoever is willing to lend you a shoulder for a bit. This will eventually end and you will live in it and love in it and cry in it some more and have your life back to "normal"..........See Morebathroom remodel overwhelming...
Comments (1)Sorry....I meant to put on baths! As I said, getting overwhelmed!!...See MoreMom’s remodel dilemma!
Comments (13)This sounds crazy to me. "she is spending everything in her saving"???? I hope you mean that her retirement savings are totally intact, and her insurance is in place and everything else...before tackling what size and color of new sofa she may need. I would just encourage her to save her money for the next big "surprise" event in homeownership. Houses have a way of surprising us with the unexpected expenses....See MoreRelated Professionals
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Leisa OwensOriginal Author