Need pictures to help you

Sorry about that—I didn’t realize they didn’t save the first time. I added them to the original post. Thanks!

The kitchen is really pretty and I think a few updates in lighting and backsplash could make a huge difference. I have a similar kitchen and am doing this right now. I look forward to see what other ideas everyone has.

The backsplash is already light, so I don't think that the expense of changing it will give you what you are looking for. Your walls are also already light. If you want easy and cheap updates, change the pendants and add light colored cushions to the bar stools (or replace the bar stools entirely). Consider adding under cabinet lighting if you don't have it already.

I feel like the small accent tiles are dating the backsplash a bit. I think I might consider painting them so they blend with the rest of the backsplash. It would be pretty easy to do. I’d definitely try that before tearing out the backsplash and putting a new one in. I think that and changing the lighting would make a big difference.

I would replace your pendants and hardware with bright shiny polished nickel and get an elongated subway that could be done in herringbone or traditional subway style, matching grout. Start with lights and hardware and see.....

https://www.shadesoflight.com/products/highland-park-pendant?via=57e1330169702d78ae0000a5,57e95f6869702d76fe000001

https://www.wayfair.com/home-improvement/pdp/top-knobs-dakota-charlotte-6-center-bar-pull-w000760448.html?piid=165392703

Live in it for a year and see how it functions for you. Meanwhile, start an ideabook here on Houzz and begin collecting the looks/features you like. I see one major flaw that would bother me, and that is the distance and the barrier island between the sink and fridge. I hate schlepping food all across the space to prepare for cooking.

Change the lighting. At the moment, all looks nice. Need to lighten things? Add accents with ceramic jar or two, vase, runner rug.... Are those your counter stools? add cushions.

I saw this paint comparison to cabinets .... If you painted the walls but kept the backsplash, it will look choppy and really make the backsplash standout

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/503066220875389842/?nic=1

If it's in the budget, I'd reface the doors. Go with something a bit more transitional with cleaner lines/bevels.

Depends on your budget. I would replace the countertops, backsplash, lighting, hardware & piece over the sink. I would also make the island one level.

I'd start with changing the scroll-y lighting. A new backsplash (not white) will only move the needle a bit. The cost may or may not be worth it to you. Consider getting an estimate on changing out the tiered island.