An older lady decided to give herself a big treat for her 70th birthday by Staying overnight in an expensive hotel. When she checked out next Morning, the desk clerk handed her a bill for $250..00. She exploded and demanded to know why the charge was so high. “It’s a Nice hotel but the rooms certainly aren’t worth $250.00 for just an overnight Stay! I didn’t even have breakfast.” The clerk told her that $250.00 is The ‘standard rate’, so she insisted on speaking to the Manager. The Manager appeared and, forewarned by the desk clerk, announced: “This Hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference centre which are Available for use.” “But I didn’t use them,” she said. ”Well, they are Here, and you could have,” explained the manager. He went on to explain that she could also have seen one of the in-hotel Shows for which the hotel is famous. “We have the best entertainers from the World over performing here,” the Manager said. “But I didn’t go to any of Those shows,” she said. “Well, we have them, and you could have,” the Manager replied. No matter What amenity the Manager mentioned, she replied, “But I didn’t use it!” and The Manager countered with his standard response. After several minutes Discussion with the Manager unmoved, she decided to pay, wrote a check and Gave it to him. The Manager was surprised when he looked at the check. "But madam, this check is for only $50.00.” “That’s correct. I charged You $200.00 for sleeping with me,” she replied. “But I didn’t!” exclaims the very surprised Manager. “Well, too bad, I Was here, and you could have.” Don’t mess with Senior Citizens !!!

^^^ LOL! I know, I noticed that, but have no idea how to correct a meme. Rusty

I had to enlarge the toilet seat photo. At first glance I thought there was a clamp holding the seat down. hee-hee

Nine Important Facts to Remember As We Grow Older #9 Death is the number 1 killer in the world. #8 Life is sexually transmitted. #7 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. #6 Men have 2 motivations: hunger and hanky panky, and they can't tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich. #5 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe years. #4 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital, dying of nothing. #3 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism. #2 In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal. #1 Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers. What you do today may be a burning issue tomorrow. Sources: