Never-Spoil Strawberries?
7 years ago
Featured Answer
Sort by:Oldest
Comments (19)
- 7 years ago
Related Discussions
I guess I may be a little spoiled
Comments (3)Argus, it's good to see that you are starting to appreciate some of the "common" vines that grow all around you there in sunny California. Thing about those commoners that appeal to folks over such a large part of America is that they are tough and can provide viewing pleasure in climates where the whimpy fancy exotics can be grown only in greenhouses. Have you checked out some of the beautiful Japanese Morning Glories now being grown. Beautiful blooms in the 5 to 7 inch range, many with really attractive leaves. You are blessed with a great environment for gardening. To really appreciate it, you need to spend a year in a hot, windy area or where the temperature gets below zero with 3 feet of snow------then you will really appreciate the "weedy vines" so abundant in your neighborhood.I'll take 'em all if I can get them to grow in this alkali soil around here!!!...See Morespoiled 19 yr old
Comments (5)I heard this quote recently: " The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents, the second half by our children." I suppose you could add, by our "lover's children." IF you LOVE HIM, REALLY LOVE HIM... like you think he and you have a long future together... Try to LOVE your boyfriend and enjoy every moment you two have together. BE "in the moment" with your boyfriend. CREATE a world where the two of you exist only to love and support each other. DO NOT let the residue of "the kids"-yours or his-pollute that world. Why should you sacrifice your relationship on the altar of the "spoiled 19yr old" ??? DO YOU really want THAT??!! The ancient meaning of "spoiled" really has to do with victory. "Spoiling" the enemy or "spoils" of war means TAKING everything of value that once belonged to your now defeated and humiliated enemy. So will you let the "spoiled 19yr old" SPOIL your relationship or will you have the victory by keeping your relationship? ...just a thought...See Morethe spoiled under-30 crowd!!! (long)
Comments (1)This is so true Moni!! LOL I especially can relate to this one Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ'd usually talk over the beginning and mess it all up!...See MoreWhy do Bio-parents spoil their kids?
Comments (11)Thanks for your kind words. And yes, absolutely .. enabling detrimental behavior is very destructive to the child and all relationships involved -present and future. Yes, also, to the truth that "being a step-parent is really, really hard, even for those of us who thought we had a good situation." I'm convinced that all positions in the step-family have their intrinsic difficulties. And, there can be real enduring love. It's still challenging for me, trust me. One boundary I'm grateful that I set in the beginning w/my husband is that I would never - ever - say a bad word about his children's mother. I've kept my word (except for the occasional slip w/him - but never w/or near the step kids). I've kept that promise w/my sons too. I also let him know - in no uncertain terms - that I would have a very difficult time respecting him if he spoke ill of his ex-wife (or me!) to his children. Kids who hear their parents trash each other get deeply wounded (after all, both parents are part of the child!). So, I bit my tongue - lots. Admittedly, quite often more out of self-preservation, than immediate concern for them: I didn't want to feed them any excuses to turn on me. Moreover, I have had genuine concern for their well being. My step-family challenges have been almost insurmountable w/the sudden death of my beloved son (3 1/2 years ago). There is no loss for a parent equal to that of a child; most simply - it's the worst loss - catastrophic, in fact. In order to honor my grief, I needed to drop any over-reaching attempts to stay connected to my step-children. All 4 are young adults who basically have no interest (or capability) in staying connected to me. I haven't been able to fill my old role (bringer together of family) w/them since my son's death. And they have been incapable of stepping into their adult roles - not only w/me, but pretty much across the board. Yes, enabling immature behaviors can cripple people. I find it too emotionally taxing to be around them much. And so, I'm not. I've let go of all expectations of them. And that's truly been a good thing to do. Over time, I've been able to see that there was a season in their younger lives that I was able to be there for them as a kind of hostess providing opportunities to allow them to connect w/their father. We had lots of good times together. In retrospect, I recognize it would have been better to let my husband figure out how to stay connected w/his kids .. or at least, not to have done as much as I did. Death rearranges everything. My step-kids have backed off and while it's a loss, frankly it's a loss w/benefits. I don't have to be in the midst of their sad power plays for attention. Not only don't I have to be, I would not be able to withstand it emotionally. It's better for my relationship w/my husband to have less to do w/them - at least for now. I have my younger son, also a young adult, whose life has been devastated by the loss of his brother, I have my son's widow and my beautiful 4 year old grand-daughter in my life. I'm blessed. There's tremendous love between us all. We are all adjusting to life w/out our loved one, each in our own way. And, like so many people who have suffered catastrophic loss, it's better for us not to have to interact w/people who suffer arrested development. I choose not to associate w/drama junkies, but w/people who are capable of sustained respect for themselves and others. My deepest connection is w/God. Maybe they'll come around. Maybe not. One thing is for certain: I will not be chasing them. And that's okay, I trust that the choice to grow up, or not, belongs to them alone. Hopefully, they will choose what's in their best interest. Thank you in advance for reading this. It helped me to simply write. And again, if something is helpful, please take it. If not, go ahead and leave it :) Wishing you the very best in your marriage and family....See More- 7 years ago
- 7 years agolast modified: 7 years ago
- 7 years ago
- 7 years ago
- 7 years agolast modified: 7 years ago
- 7 years agolast modified: 7 years ago
- 7 years ago
- 7 years agolast modified: 7 years ago
- 7 years ago
- 7 years agolast modified: 7 years ago
- 7 years ago
- 7 years ago
- 7 years agolast modified: 7 years ago
- 7 years ago
- 7 years ago
- 7 years ago
- 7 years agolast modified: 7 years ago
Related Stories

SPRING GARDENINGSummer Crops: How to Grow Strawberries
Pluck your own sweet strawberries right from the garden vine for smoothies, salads or eating then and there
Full Story
LIFESimple Pleasures: Spoil Yourself
Renew your spirit by indulging in treats, quiet time and letting someone else do your chores for once
Full Story
EDIBLE GARDENS8 Delicious Strawberry Varieties to Grow at Home
Discover our top choices for easy-to-grow plants, high berry yields and deliciously sweet strawberry flavor
Full Story
CONTAINER GARDENSPatio-Perfect Berry Bushes Like You’ve Never Seen
Small enough for pots but offering abundant fruit, these remarkable bred berries are a boon for gardeners short on space
Full Story
MOST POPULARSo You Say: 30 Design Mistakes You Should Never Make
Drop the paint can, step away from the brick and read this remodeling advice from people who’ve been there
Full Story
KITCHEN DESIGN12 Items Worth a Spot on Your Kitchen Counter
Keep these useful tools and accessories out in the open to maintain high function without spoiling the view
Full Story
DECORATING GUIDESA Beginner's Mini Guide to Buying Antiques
Experience the thrill of the hunt without ignorance ruining the spoils, with this guide to antiquing for novice buyers
Full Story
REMODELING GUIDESLet Screen Doors Mesh With Your Style
If you're spoiling all that lovely extra light and fresh air with a dull screen door, consider these imaginative options instead
Full Story
GARDENING FOR BUTTERFLIESGardening for the Bees, and Why It’s a Good Thing
When you discover how hard bees work for our food supply, you may never garden without them in mind again
Full Story
FEEL-GOOD HOME21 Ways to Waste Less at Home
Whether it's herbs rotting in the fridge or clothes that never get worn, most of us waste too much. Here are ways to make a change
Full Story
gardengal48 (PNW Z8/9)