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Do you even know your neighbors?

7 years ago

I was reading the other post about neighbors coming to visit. I don't even know my neighbors. I know who one couple is, only because the wife works at the school and my daughter went to school with one of their sons. The other day I went to get my dog back in the house after she jumped the fence and the neighbor across the street was getting her mail. She introduced herself. Has been there almost a year and has kids. I've never seen the kids or her until today. lol. I do work weird hours and if I'm home I'm at the back of the house not paying attention to the comings and goings in the neighborhood. Do you know your neighbors?

Comments (39)

  • 7 years ago

    Barely. I know the neighbor across the street the best. We look after each other's mail when either of us travels. A few others I know their name and we wave if we see one another, but we don't socialize.

  • 7 years ago

    I live in a spread out area (5-100 acre parcels) but in these many years I have come to know my neighbors some of whom I'm very friendly with although I may go months without speaking to them. I wave to most people as I drive on the road and we do socialize occasionally thank goodness.

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  • 7 years ago

    I live in a town of about 50 people. Last summer they moved 5 mobile homes into town. Before that I knew all of the 40 people who lived in town. I socialize with quite a few of them. Yes and everybody waves to each other.

  • 7 years ago

    Sure.

    Of the six houses nearest to us, all married couples but one (11 people): we went to high school with 2 men (they were both in the class just behind us), 1 woman was our son's 4th grade teacher, 1 man and 1 woman work the same place I do, 1 woman is the widow of another man that worked the same place I do, 1 woman is on the governing board of the place where I work and her husband used to be on our governing board, 1 man is the son of a man we graduated high school with. So by my count, that's 9 of our 11 neighbors that we've known for many years.

    I love small town living.

  • 7 years ago

    Where I live is a bit too rural to have a real neighborhood thing going on. I can't see neighboring houses so really do not know any of them. I did meet one one day as we were hauling our garbage bins up a shared private road to the street for pick up, only because I remarked about her dog (who was walking with her) and discovered we shared the same first name :-) But I have no idea which property is hers

  • 7 years ago

    I only know one neighbor, and we've been here 5 years. Well, I don't really know them. We wave and we've spoken with them a few times. The others - no idea. We have probably 15 houses on our street and all the homes are very close together.

  • 7 years ago

    I know many of my neighbors. Especially on my street and one street over. I share the work of the Farmers Market with my next door neighbor. We've been doing that for 3 years now. I socialize with many of my neighbors. I met most of them from walking my dogs around the neighborhood. It's a great ice breaker. It may be that since I am single, I interact with so many of my neighbors. They know if they need anything, they can usually find me at home and available to help. We are a little city within a large city so I know my city officials as well. I have the keys to several of my neighbors' houses and they have mine. I love small town living as well.

  • 7 years ago

    Yes, we know many of our neighbors quite well. I like to have gatherings that include all of the families that immediately surround us, front and back, side to side. It's great fun as we have ages from eighty down to newborns, singles, couples, and various cultures.


  • 7 years ago

    There are 50 houses in our neighborhood. About 20 years ago, I knew a lot more than now. At that time we did have an Easter egg hunt and a bonfire at Halloween for everybody. My brother in law and sister in law are across the street, so of course I know them. Next door neighbors on one side were already here when we came. I know them enough for them to call and leave a message that they will be out of town and to get their mail. Neighbors on the other side I absolutely love. She is baking the best bread. I pet sit their cats if they are on vacation. We also chat through the hedge. Just wonderful, retired couple. I know some others by name, but it is usually just a “Hi, how you are doing”. Don’t really know, but have met the neighbors 2 doors down and don’t like them. But that was a different thread of mine.

  • 7 years ago
    last modified: 7 years ago

    Not really. We live on rural acreage and have only one close neighbor. Hers is the only house you can see from mine. She is a widow in her late 70s and I have had a few conversations with her. I thought it was important when we moved there to introduce myself and make sure she knows that she can come to us if she needs help with anything. But we really don't see or talk to each other much. SO talks to her son occasionally when he comes to mow her acreage. SO often mows a large portion of it that is adjoining ours . He says it is to be nice, but he just likes playing with the giant zero turn mower he bought..... She has a lovely grandson around 16 years old I think. The FedEx people left a large heavy package of mine on her porch and he brought it up and insisted on carrying it up the steps into the house for me.

    Other than her,nope. And I like it like that. I mean, friendly neighbors are fine. But I prefer peace and quiet and most of all,privacy.

  • 7 years ago
    last modified: 7 years ago

    I know and visit with 15 neighbors. There's 350 houses in my neighborhood.

  • 7 years ago

    I know the Japanese woman next door, and we speak if we see each other on the sidewalk, but otherwise not. She has two sons that are now in the early 20s, and they always wave and say hello to me if we see each other, which is rare these days, as they have moved away. I know the couple on the other side of me better, and they take care of my plants when we go on vacation. I sometimes see them at street fairs and always at our Halloween block party. They are probably in their early 30s.

    I knew the neighbors in Venice much better, possibly because I could see into their courtyard from my kitchen window, and I would give them food rather than throw leftovers away - they were mostly college students (four guys) and would eat just about anything. They had frequent week-end parties, and we were always invited. I would often go, but Kevin would not, and his bedroom was next to their house, and their parties sometimes kept him up - especially on warm nights when he wanted to keep his windows open. They were very friendly (if a bit wacky), and I liked them a lot. We traded fruit from our trees a lot - they had tangerines, and I had figs and oranges to trade. I had more fruit trees than that, but I kept most of the other fruit for myself and other friends. We were on a busy street (Abbot Kinney) and so we did not know the people across the street at all. We mostly did not know the people behind us either, even though our lot went all the way back to the next street, which is where our driveway was. There was one rather crazy/eccentric woman behind us plus and old German man who played loud music in his back yard that I had to listen to, which included Perry Como records that would get stuck and some oompah music.

    In Culver City, where I lived before Venice, I became best friends with the neighbors next door, but this was an apartment complex with an interior courtyard with swimming pool. There were a lot of retired people living there, and I got to know quite a few of them. The one who lived below me had bought her apartment, and she had been married to Zane Grey's son and used to live on Catalina Island. She told me she liked Catalina because she could go to the casino and drink as much as she liked and then stagger home without worrying about being hit by a car because cars were banned from the island (and still are, except for golf carts).

  • 7 years ago

    I've been living here almost 5 months now. I've been over to several of the neighbors homes, even for dinner. There's no lot under 2.51 acres here. But, I do get out and about....and I'm pretty friendly. I waved at a couple bicycling by and they stopped and introduced themselves, for instance.

  • 7 years ago
    last modified: 7 years ago

    I, who grew up on a farm near a nearby village, but moved to the prairies over 70 years ago, know some more than others, here, including some recent comers to this country road.

    I have continued a connection with a couple who I think were involved with my landlord's offer to rent this house to me over a dozen years ago, following my having cared for it for a time, after they retired about 8 years ago from their farm to a seniors' small condo in a nearby village and they value my visits.

    For two recent years I've visited over a dozen neighbours each Feb. to invite them to contribute to the research and support work carried out by the Heart and Stroke Foundation, which has helped with ongoing connection.

    I'll be doing that again, in a couple of weeks. Hey, maybe I should invite them all to my birthday party: no gifts ... just contribute to Heart & Stroke, please!

    Some have received veggies from my garden, with recent comers especially having been surprised when invited to pass generosity along to needy, charity or church when they asked the price.

    ole joyful

  • 7 years ago

    Yes, although we aren't as close (physically or relationship-wise) as in our former neighborhood where I had keys to every house on the block at one point. Here 5 years - We know names, basic information, could call or would expect to be called if someone had a problem or worry, needed a hand with something. The people directly below us have told their teen children to come here if they were gone and an adult was needed for something. The single man with the home closest is teaching himself bread baking and shares those improving loaves. The home at the end of our dead end street is someone who grew up next door to DH (decades ago). He's here a lot, great company and very helpful - he enjoys all those handyman type skills that have never really interested DH. His cooking skills are amazing, and he delivers dinner to us about once a month or so. Honest - we don't look hungry, but somehow people feed us ;0)

  • 7 years ago

    Ye I do. I've had some health issues the past several years and haven't been myself so entertaining has been almost non existent. For some reason, I'm not sure why, the end of November I started getting my stamina back.. Thank the Lord because I had the whole family here for Christmas and before that, wasn't quite sure how I would get through it. We had new neighbors move in this summer. DH had met them when he was at the mailbox, and has talked to them several times. He had been after me to do something and I wanted to but just didn't have the energy. Just before Christmas I finished all my baking and had made up a tray of cookies for several neighbors (new ones included) and had planned on stopping by and introducing myself when delivering the cookies. Unfortunately, several hours before I was planning on getting cleaned up and looking presentable, my doorbell rang and there stood my new neighbor with her grandson. I was mortified that she beat me to it. Now that the holidays are over and I've successfully recuperated, I've invited several neighbors for dinner next Saturday so they can meet the new couple. Also, there's about 9 or 10 of the neighborhood ladies that do lunch once a month. Not all show up every month, but usually there's 6 or 7. We go to a local restaurant, eat, visit and then go on our merry way. It's a nice way to stay in touch.

  • 7 years ago

    I live on a street with 40 houses and know almost everyone. We socialize and have block parties. As new younger families move in, I don't feel as close to them as to my longtime neighbors. I like having people to chat with when I am outside, but on the other hand everybody knows everyone's business. That bothers me. My next door neighbor is nice enough but she is kind of bossy. She started "informing"me that our houses are very close together and I looked at her and said "yes, I've noticed that in the 45 years I've lived here." I like knowing the neighbors but would be happier with more privacy.

  • 7 years ago

    Altho we have only been in this house going on 3 yrs., I have known the next door neighbour since his Mom was pregnant with him :)....the one down from immediate next I have also known for over 40 yrs......and yes,we all speak

  • 7 years ago

    We have awesome neighbors. 5 families . We all get along and help each other - even our dogs play together. My block is a little slice of heaven :)

  • 7 years ago

    Been here 30 years. Don't know any of our neighbors. Wouldn't recognize them if I saw them in the supermarket. Hubby knows all of them, and all of their families and stories!


  • 7 years ago

    I know the people in the six houses closest to us on our street. I don't know any of the neighbors on the street behind us. I used to wave to the man who lived in the house immediately behind us, and our dogs were very friendly, but he and his wife moved last fall and I haven't seen the new people ... maybe when gardening season starts again. And I can think of four or five other folks we know who live a couple streets over.

    When walking our dogs around the neighborhood, everyone is friendly enough and waves and will return a "good morning" but that's as far as it goes.

  • 7 years ago

    Yes, we went out to dinner with our closest neighbors last night (they live 1/4 mile from us). The next couple down the road keep to themselves. After that, there is another couple we are friendly with although we don't see them that often as they are always coming and going. There are other neighbors beyond them, but due to the distance, we don't see them often and don't really know them.

  • 7 years ago

    Some years ago we sold 9 acres on the back of our place that is on another road. The guy who bought it was really nice and planned to build a house there. I don't know what happened because he doesn't seem to ever go there any more. He dug an old pond out and made it 2 acres, made a first class dam on it, and built nice docks on the pond and cleared all around it, but for the past few years has grown up in weeds. Anyway, when I was talking to him when he was thinking of buying the place, I told him "I will never sit on your couch, I won't show up in the mornings expecting coffee, I don't expect to be invited to your barbecues, and I don't care if you operate a whore house over here, but if you ever need anything, don't hesitate to ask." In other words, I am not intrusive but willing to be helpful if needed.

    I lived in Santa Fe for 30 years, and always got along with my neighbors. I think in all those years, I was in the houses next to me once. When I was moving, I said goodbye to one of my neighbors....we had often chatted across the fence...and told him I appreciated how nice he had been to live next to. (He had always been the perfect gentleman.) The next day...the very next day!!...he called me to the fence and asked me what I thought of a certain sex act. To say I was taken back by that, is to put it mildly. I told him, "I don't think of that."

    Good grief. Was that something he had always wanted to ask me, and thought his time was running out? I don't know.

  • 7 years ago

    I had the most wonderful neighbors at the flood house. That's something we miss. We lost so many great people when they left the neighborhood. We keep in touch and visit. My neighbor there still has her house, they are eventually going to get it fixed up again. We are still best friends and see each other often, go to lunch, she is still in the garden club. Here at the new house, I of course still have all the people who are in the garden club around the neighborhood. I have met the new neighbors across the street, we chat on nextdoor frequently. I know another across the street, his company does our lawn and gardening. He is a great guy. The lady we lived with right after the flood lives 3 houses down the street from us so we see her often. We need to get to know more of the neighbors right around this house. We wave and are friendly to all of them. Plus I have contact with many of them on nextdoor.

  • 7 years ago

    There is only two other families on my street other than my family that has lived on the street since the 1940's. I don't know anyone in the first block since they all either passed away or moved over the years. I know quite a few neighbours on my block and quite a few I am really close to. There are also new neighbours that I only know to see. Growing up all the neighbours sat on the front porch, then over the years people started building decks in their backyards so you didn't see them very often. I have always been a front porch sitter as is my neighbour across the street. My friend Karen who lived across the street who has now passed away used to yell over "Anne, cross the ditch for a beverage" We used to laugh ourselves silly while sitting on her porch and other neighbours would come over to see what we were laughing about. They were such good times. I still hear her laugh. When neighbours walk down the street they stop by to chat if they see me sitting on the porch, even neighbours I don't know who live in the 3rd block. I often bring meals over to one of my neighbours because she rarely gets out to go shopping. My neighbour across the street cuts my front grass for me because I could never get the lawn mower to start so he said he would do my lawn when he did his. A new neighbour moved in across the street in the summer. I haven't met them yet, I can't tell if it is a father and son or if there is a mother that lives there too. I just know one day just after they moved in a woman came over when she saw me picking up after the dog invited me to come over for a burger but I wasn't able to go and I was just so shocked at the invite I never introduced myself. I was going to bring over a tray of Christmas cookies to them but I was sick over the holidays and didn't do any baking. Some of my neighbours are like family to me. I don't ever plan on moving out of my neighbourhood because it is a wonderful place to live

  • PRO
    7 years ago
    last modified: 7 years ago

    I’ve lived here for over 34 years now. I know some of the people on my block, but only socialize with a couple, and even that is rare. Neighbors directly across from me are phantoms - wouldn’t recognize them if they rang the doorbell. It’s not an “in and out of one another’s houses” kind of neighborhood. But when DH died, two neighbors asked to do the alter flowers and did, and two others made condolence calls and brought food.

    It suits me just fine, even though it’s very different from our neighborhood in St Louis. Of course, it had sidewalks and there were 27 children on the one block! Different time and different stage of life.

  • 7 years ago
    last modified: 7 years ago

    Been here for about 11 years. We live in a neighborhood of about 30 houses, each set on at least 2 acres. We are acquainted with several. Those that are in closest proximity we know pretty well. 3 of them have children under 12.

    When I had surgery last July, one of our neighbors came over with her kids every day to water my potted plants. Another brought a "get well basket" with magazines and snacks. Some of the kids would get the mail for me (at the street) and bring it up to the door. The children just love being helpful!

    Before Halloween, I'd purchased some cheap kit at the Dollar Store for our grandkids and there were 6 left over. So I invited the neighborhood kids over to craft. We had the best time.

    So I picked up another set of Christmas crafts, and we did it again. Now I'm looking for a Valentine craft of some sort.

    The adults refer to us as "practice grandparents." LOL




  • 7 years ago
    last modified: 7 years ago

    Not all to chat with, but everyone waves. We live in homes with at least two acres surrounding them, maybe 25 homes in our subdivision. Many are walkers so evenings are when we see each other, pass, chat, pet the dogs etc. We compare sewer and well issues, road falling apart etc. When you live outside of town and sort of off the police beat we have learned to watch for things that aren't the norm. It has not been unusual for me to get a call when home ill from a neighbor noticing my dryer venting or an odd car in my driveway--just checking to see it is all kosher. We moved in 20 yrs ago. There were many younger families. Now the originals have died and new young families are moving in, we are the empty nesters. Cycle of life.

  • 7 years ago
    last modified: 7 years ago

    In Ohio and Tennessee we knew our neighbors very, very well. Our neighbors in Ohio where either close friends of my kids (close as in hangout everyday for 6 years) or really close friends of us. We still visit our neighbors when we occasionally go back to Ohio. Of course, there where a few neighbors we weren’t really friends with but I still talked to them and got to know them.

    Tennesee was mostly the same. Neighbors not quite as close as in Ohio, but my kids had friends and we knew several neighbors across the street from us!

    We currently live in Arizona and I have only met three of our neighbors. these people aren‘t very talkative!

  • 7 years ago

    I know, and like, all of my neighbors within about 1/4 mile, any direction. The nearest neighbors to the west are in a cluster of houses 1/4 mile away. I went to school with two of them, another was my brother's first grade teacher; another works at a bank I frequent, and another is a friend of my brother's, who came with my brother to visit us when we lived in Colorado 28 years ago.

    In the 1/4 mile to the east are the neighbors to whom we've been closest, watched our kids grow up together, and are now watching grandkids. One of the men was my son's teacher, and I used to buy milk and eggs from another neighbor, when she and her husband ran a small farm. The elderly couple at the bend in the road have adopted me since my husband passed away. Before then, they loved seeing my kids when they were young, and now love to see the grandkids stop for a chat.

    One of my daughter's classmates bought the farm to our south, and I've chatted with him several times when I've run into him at the fence line. Two distant cousins live to the north, and although one stopped to offer his help after my husband passed, I don't really see them, except to wave as they drive past my house.

    Other than the elderly couple, I don't really make it a point to go visit, but if I'm in the yard and see any of the neighbors out for a stroll, I usually walk to the end of the driveway to say hello, on their return trip.

    There is only one neighbor about whom I have mixed feelings. She lives on a dead-end road that starts at the 1/4 point, and drives a distinctive pick-up truck. A few years ago her cattle escaped and made a mess of my soggy yard and pond berms. When I complained, she said she'd fix the damage, but she never did, and I let it go. Her nephew hit our mailbox and didn't stop to tell us--the only way we knew who did the damage was that she came back looking for a piece of his side-view mirror, and asked if we'd found it. She didn't offer to fix the mailbox, so we fixed it, and let it go. Even though I recognize her truck, I no longer wave, or go out of my way to chat with her.

  • 7 years ago

    We used to know - and occasionally socialize with - the people who lived across from us and behind us. They've all moved and we don't know the new ones behind us at all, and the new ones across from us, we don't like and have no desire to interact with.

    Main reason, they keep their 2 dogs kenneled in their backyard 24 x 7 and the poor things bark 24 x 7, for which we don't blame them. Second reason, they constantly have visitors who park their big pickups on the narrow street across from our driveway and make it tricky to pull out.

    Other than the above, we wave but don't really talk to anyone. We are planning to move in a few years and I am looking forward to it. :)

  • 7 years ago
    last modified: 7 years ago

    Yup. We live in an older neighborhood close to the university. Have been here 38 years and seen many come & go. There's a wide mix of residents ... young families, professionals, retirees, professors, students. Have always been on speaking terms. Since we started walking a few years ago we've met even more people. We make it a point to introduce ourselves when someone new moves in.

  • 7 years ago
    last modified: 7 years ago

    We’ve been in our house 13 years and only know a couple of our neighbors. However, our subdivision is really small and kind of divided with 3 houses on one street and the rest on small a cul de sac behind us. One neighbor is a couple that live to one side of us and the other is a widow who lives directly behind. The couple next to us are our age with grown kids. We chat when we see each other and will help each other out as needed, They’ve also invited us to a couple of parties they had which was nice too. The lady behind us is also our age and and a widow of 4 years. Unfortunately, she’s one of those busybodies that every neighborhood seems to have and for years we couldn’t take anyone in our backyard without her finding a way to come over and inject herself. I finally had to put a stop to it which made things a little awkward for a while. Luckily, our dog loves her and visa versa so eventually (thanks to our dog) things got worked out. Both of these neighbors bought their homes when they were built in the late 80’s and have known every one who’s lived in our house so it was a bonus to be able to hear about some of the house’s history.

  • 7 years ago

    No I don't know my neighbors as we moved here two years ago and it took me 15 years to get to know my neighbors a little bit at my old place. I'm slow to socialize. I know there's a name for that. Oh yeah, recluse. :-).

  • 7 years ago

    No and we've been in our house 29 years. We know people in the neighbourhood, mainly the parents of the kids our sons went to school with. When we moved in we had a toddler and a newborn and the kids of our direct neighbours were older. Those families eventually moved out after their kids had left and the parents downsized. So now, the people who have been moving in are younger with young kids. So no, we just never connected.

  • 7 years ago

    Nope. Don't know them. We first bought a house in our early 20's on a dead end street. My favorite neighborhood I ever lived in. There were probably 25 houses and most were young families with two or three elderly neighbors. So many kids...mostly boys. Three houses had four boys. I loved this street...the best place I ever lived. I made two lifelong friends...one a godmother to my daughter. Sadly both are dead but we kept in touch with calls until the ends of their lives. Then we moved to the country for three years and I hated every second of living there despite the fact there was a lake across the street. Then we moved to a development where the kids spent their school years. Everyone was in their 30's with kids and lots of parties and kid stuff. 35 years ago we moved to a 180-year-old house in a town five miles from there and I know no neighbors intimately. I just wave and say hi...I have a few people I stop and talk with walking the dog in good weather. I have two streets and an alley surrounding my house with one neighbor and that house has been empty for half a year since the people moved out. The two friends I had in this town have died in the last few years.

  • 7 years ago
    last modified: 7 years ago

    Yes and no. In a neighborhood of over 200 units, we know or know of maybe 25%. This is an area that's NOT rural or a small town. There is an HOA but the subdivision of moderate sized suburban lots (large for the area) was for the land only and all homes were each individually custom built by the first owners. We know (enough to recognize) those in perhaps the 10 houses in both directions nearest our house, to a greater or lesser degree. The neighborhood vibe is "we're there if you need us, and we hope you're there if we need you. Otherwise, we'll go about our business and you can go about yours". That seems to work very well and everyone is happy. There are a few events through the year put on by the HOA and the turnout is pretty good. It's a good way to get to know more neighbors.

  • 7 years ago

    Yes, I do know all of those who live in my HOA...and many others here in this small town.